Archive for the ‘television’ category
April 17, 2013
– – As you’re likely aware, the Aflac Duck was recently injured, suffering damage to his beak and a wing. Now the waterfowl is fighting his way back, with help from physical therapy and the inspiration of Rocky Balboa! In the 60 second commercial, we are shown the duck struggling with such therapy tasks as climbing stairs, treading water, working on a gym station, and jumping rope…slow and sad piano-accented music plays in the background. It’s so hard for the doggedly-determined duck…but then he starts to get his energy and range of motion back, and as the soundtrack of “Eye of the Tiger” by Survivor plays in the background, we see the duck working out like a champ!
The underlying message is that with Aflac to pay his bills so he doesn’t have to worry, the duck can focus on therapy and getting better…and there’s no keeping a good duck down! He’s gotten 35,000 get-well cards, according to Aflac’s chief marketing executive, who considers the duck and the brand to be not an image but an experience. But will he suffer from post-traumatic stress, and require therapy? This is the 58th commercial to feature the Aflac duck, if you’re counting…
Categories: absurdities, animal spokepersons, animals, anthropomorphic, Brilliant but twisted, furry commercials, television
Tags: Aflac Duck therapy
Comments: 2 Comments
April 10, 2013
– – In a recent Geico commercial, the company spokes-gecko travels back to the ninth century to book passage on a viking longship and comment on the difficulty of mobile phone communications in that time period. The viking-era ship forges through a nasty storm at sea, its stalwart oarsmen keeping pace with the thudding drumbeat provided to synchronize their efforts. As the gecko traverses the water-soaked deck of the viking vessel, the absurd juxtaposition somehow works!
The spot cross-promotes Geico with the new History Channel series, Vikings. Well-written and acted, the Vikings show is worthy of your attention for its characterization and attention to detail. There’s death, decapitation, spirited combat, and political scheming…and talk about tough! One viking wife beats off two would-be rapists with a sword, while another on a raiding party dispatches her lusty assailant with a dagger! Defending English warriors are outclassed by the Vikings after a hard day’s raiding, and they seem to relish the workout. Vikings is a gritty and unflinching show about some of history’s toughest warriors, so pass the mead, and let us feast!
Categories: animal spokepersons, anthropomorphic, furry commercials, television
Tags: gecko with the Vikings, the Vikings
Comments: 2 Comments
April 8, 2013
– – Wouldn’t you like to have a hawk for a friend that obligingly drops off a cold drink when you’ve a hankering for one? The dude in the “No Man’s Land” commercial for Dr. Pepper 10 does, and also frolics with a bear in the wilderness, tears and chews bark right off a tree, and effortlessly carries a huge log with one arm! Such things are apparently possible when you partake of “The Manliest Low-Calorie Soda in the History of Mankind.” Welcome to the manly world of Dr. Pepper 10, so manly it’s packaged in gunmetal-gray cans.- -Would Hillary Clinton drink this?- –I think not!
‘Ya see, diet sodas are frequently perceived as wimpy drinks unfavored by manly men, so the good folks at Dr. Pepper have brought us this neo-version of Grizzly Adams to counter this perception. Partaking of it’s “bold flavor” and ten calories enables us to be “wild and free,” or so they would have us believe; all that’s missing is a drum circle. So much for guys being sensitive and in touch with our feelings, and I like my diet drinks just fine.- -I’ll gladly take a friendly hawk and a bear buddy, though, if anyone’s offering…
Categories: absurdities, animals, Brilliant but twisted, furry, furry commercials, television
Tags: Dr. Pepper 10
Comments: 2 Comments
April 2, 2013
– – Back when special effects were a lot less special in the 1960’s, we were treated to an episode of Star Trek (The Original Series) called Arena where a young William Shatner’s James T. Kirk fought a powerful but ponderous and slow-moving reptilian creature called a Gorn.- –Well, 46 years after their original encounter, Shatner is again rematched with his scaly rival in a commercial for a Star Trek video game debuting this month. The duo is comfortably seated on a sofa in a cozy living room, each one armed with a video controller and engaged in virtual on-screen combat!
Things get a little heated, and the two arise to their feet to engage in hand-to-hand combat, complete with sofa cushions being thrown, and the legendary Starfleet captain dodging clumsy swings by the reptilian! When the combatants clinch, Shatner breaks the reptile’s hold by smacking his palms over its ear orifices. As the Gorn moans in pain, Shatner accuses it of overacting, and out of breath admonishes it that, “We’re both too old for this kind of thing!”- -Wonderful stuff!
The Gorn depicted is true to the original creature, complete with bulky costume and compound eyes. A computer-generated Gorn as later seen in an episode of Star Trek: Enterprise was considerably more agile, and moved quickly. This flashback, however, reminds us of what may be Gorn, but not forgotten…
Categories: absurdities, animals, anthropomorphic, Brilliant but twisted, furry commercials, scalies, sci fi, television
Tags: Shatner and Gorn commercial, Shatner vs. Gorn
Comments: 2 Comments
March 29, 2013
– – Many of us like to hug kittens, but would you like to wear them?- -Not as skins, heaven forbid, but as living, moving creatures? It would be unnatural, and possibly a bit surreal if not creepy. Then you’d probably pick up a lot of cat hair, and what if one of them had to pee or poop? Many would be the problems of a kitten shirt, not to be confused with a hair shirt, worn in the Middle Ages to mortify the flesh, which is not an idea much in vogue in contemporary society…
…well, hair shirts were worn intentionally to be uncomfortable, and the idea of this commercial for Hanes ComfortBlend T-shirts and underwear is that they’re as soft or next best to being covered with luxurious kitten fur. To drive home that point, we are shown a man wearing a digitally-enhanced shirt of many kittens, and they don’t seem to be overly-distressed by being worn, moving slightly and mewing independently. The kitten-shirt wearing man doesn’t seem to be getting much support on his attire from his friends, so he taps Hanes spokesman Michael Jordan for his opinion. Michael doesn’t seem to think much of kitten shirts either, and you can bet that PETA would be of the same frame of mind.
While cat-friendly, I doubt I’d like a kitten shirt, as well. Now if you’d care to cover me with Catwoman, however, that’s another matter entirely…
Categories: absurdities, animals, Brilliant but twisted, furry, furry commercials, television
Tags: Hanes cat commercial, kitten undershirt
Comments: 2 Comments
March 27, 2013
– – He understands marketing completely, wears an electronic speech translation device around his neck, and occasionally eats his staff members…that’s Mr. Wolfdog, the marketing director brought in by Old Spice to promote their Wild Collection fragrance line. Wolfie knows his way around an office, and his is complete with devices like calculators, business awards, and desk toys like a Newton’s Cradle. Wolfdog is also a busy rascal, having made a series of banner ads, a number of videos posted on YouTube, animated GIFs, and even an album of inspirational business music called Night Business, with cover art featuring Wolfie in shades and a cool casual suit! His credentials include being Alpha Male for Deciduous Forest Pack #13588 in Woods, Montana.
It’s all parody, but with videos such as How to Give Constructive Criticism (“Use a compliment kabob!,” “Wear a criticism sweater!”), Wolfdog is a more authentic, creative, and benign supervisor than some I’ve had.- -I could work for this guy! He’d be a great improvement, actually…
Categories: absurdities, animal spokepersons, animals, anthropomorphic, Brilliant but twisted, furry, furry commercials, television
Tags: Director Wolfdog, Old Spice's Wolfdog
Comments: 3 Comments
March 23, 2013
– – The commercial for Old Spice’s Hawkridge runs like a demented out-take for Alfred Hitchcock’s The Birds. It’s a high-stakes poker game, and two male players are squaring off over the card hands that they hold while on-lookers gawk. One card player with glasses, a receding hairline, and a handful of costly rings is contending against a handsome guy who has, interestingly enough, a hawk on his arm. Although he holds a royal flush, the dominant player is sweating. We are privy to his thoughts; “I couldn’t get a read on him. Is he bluffing?,” thinks the man. Looking up, the royal flush holder sees that his opponent now has two hawks. Scree, screech the hawks. A moment later, the hawks have multiplied to four; scree, they cry. Briefly later, the hawks have multiplied yet again. The shrill cries are now a chorus, with hawks descending from above and one even roosting on the handsome guy’s head.- -Holy Hitchcock!
When yet another hawk rolls out from under the table between the bespectacled guy’s legs, he obviously has even more to sweat about, and so decides to fold despite holding an unbeatable hand. This is known as winning by intimidation. A victory for the hawkmaster, who has also by now acquired his opponent’s girlfriend! The message is that this scent doesn’t just attract women, but vanquishes competition! Talk about giving someone the bird…
Categories: animal presence, animal spokepersons, animals, Brilliant but twisted, feathered friends, furry commercials, television
Tags: Hawkridge commercial
Comments: 2 Comments
March 21, 2013
– – It’s wild, and perhaps a bit crazy…like a fox! Also like a wolf and a hawk. Meet the Old Spice Wild Collection, which introduces men’s scents called Wolfthorn, Foxcrest (- -yay!), and Hawkridge. Now unfortunately (or fortunately), these scents smell nothing like the wild animals that they’re using as mascots, but at least you won’t wind up smelling like stale beer or Axe. All three scents are available as antiperspirants/deodorants, body washes, body sprays, after shave lotions, and cologne sprays.
Now these scents stay with you, so the commercial for Wolfthorn is narrated by a woman who’s at a high society function when she meets a man who literally comes in with a snarling wolf hanging on each of his shoulders. “I was afraid, then seduced, then intigued, then in a car,” she relates. “I never had a chance!,” she concludes as the whistled classic Old Spice theme plays. The wolf-wearer bears his wolves with him at every step, drives his car with the babe and beasts right through the fancy glass side doors of the society affair, and barrels off into the night with them.- -I do so love a happy ending!
This certainly beats an earlier Old Spice commercial where a sea captain was shown fighting with a squid-like creature on his shoulder…and did I buy Foxcrest? – – Well, what do you think?!
Categories: animal presence, animal spokepersons, animals, furry, furry commercials, television
Tags: Old Spice Wild Collection, Wolfthorn commercial
Comments: 2 Comments
March 19, 2013
– – It’s cheesy, and proud of it…Wolfman Mac’s Chiller Drive-In, that is! Many of us when young grew up with regional variations of the “Chiller Theater” concept, a show usually on Saturday night which presented horror or science fiction films from the 1950’s or 1960’s, such “The Crawling Eye” or “Attack of the 50-Foot Woman.” Armed with a freshly-made batch of Jiffy Pop popcorn, I’d settle down before the tube for two hours of kiddie bliss. Horror and sci fi films of that era weren’t terribly graphic and the special effects were laughable by today’s standards, but they were great stuff to a ten-year-old! Some of those shows included hosts, such as Elvira, Mistress of the Dark.
Wolfman Mac is cut from the same cloth as such hosts, but he’s lower budget still. He’s a werewolf who runs a dilapidated drive-in located in the fictional town of Hauntington Heights that shows B-grade horror movies you’ll marvel were ever made. The Wolfman’s sidekick is an wisecracking, extremely fake-looking plastic skeleton called Boney Bob. There are over a dozen cast members that include TORG the robot, a guy in a cardboard box costume; and the nutty Professor M. Balmer. During breaks from the movie, they perform skits that mirror or parody the action from the flick. It’s not Shakespeare, but is great late-night fun!
Wolfman Mac is in real life Mac Kelly, who as a kid loved old horror films, werewolves, and all things Halloween. Originally a local show, it’s now carried nationally by the Retro Television Network, but has retained all of its high camp charm…
Categories: absurdities, animals, anthropomorphic, Brilliant but twisted, furry, television
Tags: Wolfman Mac
Comments: 2 Comments
March 16, 2013
– – The aptly-named reality show Odd Folks Home is a spin-off of the Science Channel show, Oddities. It tends to feature the most eccentric clients of the Obscura Antiques and Oddities store showcased in the parent show, and viewers are taken into the homes of these people to see their private collections and practices. Many of these individuals would be at home residing with the Addams Family; there are sword swallowers and fire eaters, and artists who work in such mediums as skulls, animal parts, and human blood. These people would be fun dates, and indeed one lady screens her men by taking them home to see how they handle such tasks as articulating a cat skeleton.
The show has the perfect host in Edgar Oliver (pictured), a real-life playwright and actor who takes creepiness to an art form. On the Oddities show, we see him in a state of near ecstasy over the discovery of a straightjacket. “Are you sitting…comfortably?,” inquires Edgar of the listening audience on some episodes of Odd Folks, with the perfect facial expressions and hand gestures.- -This guy is a treasure!
You can learn much about the morbid and macabre from this show, and for that reason it’s probably not suitable for young children or the squeamish. As for me, however, I’m right at home in the Odd Folks Home…
Categories: anomalies, Brilliant but twisted, strange, television
Tags: Edgar Oliver, Odd Folks Home
Comments: 3 Comments
FOXSYLVANIA 
You must be logged in to post a comment.