— Ah, the stories, the wonderful fantastic tales that could be shared if Dorothy from “Oz” and Alice from “Wonderland” could sit down together, and compare notes on a pleasant summer afternoon! I’d surely pull up a chair to listen in to that conversation!
Alice could open by relating how she followed a white rabbit with a watch who seemed much preoccupied with the time, while Dorothy could share an encounter with a cowardly lion. Alice might speak of meeting a hookah-smoking caterpillar, while Dorothy could regale us with descriptions of flying monkeys. There would be reports of animal abuse, too, such as Alice’s description of a croquet game with flamingos used as mallets, and Dorothy’s account of a green-hued witch threatening her small dog.
Some of the strangest furry encounters in literature have been described or related by children, or by those with child-like, open minds. Weird shit, indeed, and oddly compelling…
– – Hipster Maxwell the pig may have hail damage to his baby blue VW Cabriolet, but he’s so slick that he speedily gets an appointment through his Geico app with an insurance adjuster, and as fellow hail damage sufferer Ted struggles on hold with his insurance company, Maxwell even has time to steal Ted’s girlfriend away, and go boating with her! “Later, Ted!,” chortles the nameless fickle girl. –What is it with pigs, anyhow, that makes them “chick magnets?” Perhaps because they’re both farm animals…
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– – Camels haven’t figured in commercials much since the days of tobacco pitchman Joe Camel, who was, it must be admitted, extremely cool. Now at last we have an anthropomorphic camel figuring in a Geico commercial, who parades around an office interrupting and distracting workers by happily asking them what day it is. The answer to the dromedary’s query is that it’s Wednesday, also known as hump day. Our two amiable musical hosts then appear, one asking us how happy people are that save hundreds of dollars on car insurance; the answer is that they’re happier than a camel on Wednesday…
– – The season finale of Monsters and Mysteries in America went off with a bang in their “Desert Wasteland” episode, treating us to tales (and tails) of thunderbirds, skinwalkers, nightstalkers, and not to be forgotten, aliens! The American Southwest may be a desert wasteland, but it’s rich in really cool folklore! Of course, I was hooked, and wouldn’t have been disturbed unless there was an earthquake or I was on fire.
– – Seldom are cryptids described as goat-like, but the “Goatman” of Western Kentucky is an exception. As characterized on the Discovery Channel’s show, Monsters and Mysteries in America, the Goatman is reputed to have hypnotic powers of a sort, to be able to imitate voices, and to entice people to climb the Pope Lick railroad trestle to lure them to their doom. 
– – As you’re likely aware, the Aflac Duck was recently injured, suffering damage to his beak and a wing. Now the waterfowl is fighting his way back, with help from physical therapy and the inspiration of Rocky Balboa! In the 60 second commercial, we are shown the duck struggling with such therapy tasks as climbing stairs, treading water, working on a gym station, and jumping rope…slow and sad piano-accented music plays in the background. It’s so hard for the doggedly-determined duck…but then he starts to get his energy and range of motion back, and as the soundtrack of “Eye of the Tiger” by Survivor plays in the background, we see the duck working out like a champ!
– – Many strange things may be found in New York City, including people who walk about in unlicensed character costumes offering tourists the opportunity to have their children photographed with them in the expectation of getting a several buck tip in return. These characters are known to frequent Times Square and elsewhere, and may be dressed up as Sesame Street notables, Mario of Nintendo fame, Buzz Lightyear, Winnie the Pooh, or perhaps the Statue of Liberty, to name a few; some of the outfits are poor copies, barely recognizable. Trouble is, the hustlers tend to be a bit aggressive, and at times have been known to bother or pursue their marks for photo privileges, demanding money afterwards before putting a photographed child down. There have been ugly incidents as well; last summer, someone dressed as Grover lost it, and burst into an antisemitic rant in public…a Super Mario once groped a woman, and a Spiderman even punched a mom! Hardly your friendly neighborhood Spidey…
– – In a recent Geico commercial, the company spokes-gecko travels back to the ninth century to book passage on a viking longship and comment on the difficulty of mobile phone communications in that time period. The viking-era ship
– – Many of us yearn for a furry transformation, but there are those who wish for a more uncommon conversion. Among these rare and exotic types are those who are into mermaids, or their male counterparts, mermen. Both according to legend are alluring and seductive sea creatures who possess the upper body of a human and the lower body of a fish. They tend to make themselves visible to ships during storms, using their siren-like singing to lure the opposite sex into the water.
FOXSYLVANIA 
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