Archive for the ‘animal spokepersons’ category
March 27, 2013
– – He understands marketing completely, wears an electronic speech translation device around his neck, and occasionally eats his staff members…that’s Mr. Wolfdog, the marketing director brought in by Old Spice to promote their Wild Collection fragrance line. Wolfie knows his way around an office, and his is complete with devices like calculators, business awards, and desk toys like a Newton’s Cradle. Wolfdog is also a busy rascal, having made a series of banner ads, a number of videos posted on YouTube, animated GIFs, and even an album of inspirational business music called Night Business, with cover art featuring Wolfie in shades and a cool casual suit! His credentials include being Alpha Male for Deciduous Forest Pack #13588 in Woods, Montana.
It’s all parody, but with videos such as How to Give Constructive Criticism (“Use a compliment kabob!,” “Wear a criticism sweater!”), Wolfdog is a more authentic, creative, and benign supervisor than some I’ve had.- -I could work for this guy! He’d be a great improvement, actually…
Categories: absurdities, animal spokepersons, animals, anthropomorphic, Brilliant but twisted, furry, furry commercials, television
Tags: Director Wolfdog, Old Spice's Wolfdog
Comments: 3 Comments
March 23, 2013
– – The commercial for Old Spice’s Hawkridge runs like a demented out-take for Alfred Hitchcock’s The Birds. It’s a high-stakes poker game, and two male players are squaring off over the card hands that they hold while on-lookers gawk. One card player with glasses, a receding hairline, and a handful of costly rings is contending against a handsome guy who has, interestingly enough, a hawk on his arm. Although he holds a royal flush, the dominant player is sweating. We are privy to his thoughts; “I couldn’t get a read on him. Is he bluffing?,” thinks the man. Looking up, the royal flush holder sees that his opponent now has two hawks. Scree, screech the hawks. A moment later, the hawks have multiplied to four; scree, they cry. Briefly later, the hawks have multiplied yet again. The shrill cries are now a chorus, with hawks descending from above and one even roosting on the handsome guy’s head.- -Holy Hitchcock!
When yet another hawk rolls out from under the table between the bespectacled guy’s legs, he obviously has even more to sweat about, and so decides to fold despite holding an unbeatable hand. This is known as winning by intimidation. A victory for the hawkmaster, who has also by now acquired his opponent’s girlfriend! The message is that this scent doesn’t just attract women, but vanquishes competition! Talk about giving someone the bird…
Categories: animal presence, animal spokepersons, animals, Brilliant but twisted, feathered friends, furry commercials, television
Tags: Hawkridge commercial
Comments: 2 Comments
March 21, 2013
– – It’s wild, and perhaps a bit crazy…like a fox! Also like a wolf and a hawk. Meet the Old Spice Wild Collection, which introduces men’s scents called Wolfthorn, Foxcrest (- -yay!), and Hawkridge. Now unfortunately (or fortunately), these scents smell nothing like the wild animals that they’re using as mascots, but at least you won’t wind up smelling like stale beer or Axe. All three scents are available as antiperspirants/deodorants, body washes, body sprays, after shave lotions, and cologne sprays.
Now these scents stay with you, so the commercial for Wolfthorn is narrated by a woman who’s at a high society function when she meets a man who literally comes in with a snarling wolf hanging on each of his shoulders. “I was afraid, then seduced, then intigued, then in a car,” she relates. “I never had a chance!,” she concludes as the whistled classic Old Spice theme plays. The wolf-wearer bears his wolves with him at every step, drives his car with the babe and beasts right through the fancy glass side doors of the society affair, and barrels off into the night with them.- -I do so love a happy ending!
This certainly beats an earlier Old Spice commercial where a sea captain was shown fighting with a squid-like creature on his shoulder…and did I buy Foxcrest? – – Well, what do you think?!
Categories: animal presence, animal spokepersons, animals, furry, furry commercials, television
Tags: Old Spice Wild Collection, Wolfthorn commercial
Comments: 2 Comments
March 14, 2013
– – Litter Genie is a cat litter disposal system, not to be confused with Little Genie, the Elton John song. Anyways, Litter Genie features a spokes-cat named Walter, who is a bit of a singing sensation himself. Walter has actually cut some music videos, one of which is called I Haz a Pie Row Tek Nik, performing as Walter and the Awful Pawfuls. My favorite Walter video, however, is a flashback to the psychedelic sixties, with the fab feline performing I Haz a Catnip in Mah Head with Walter and the Wizards. This is from an album called, Litter Trippin’.
Yet another of Walter’s music videos is called, Me Luvz Mahself, with Walter performing with the Lap Cats and featuring rhythm and blues styling with cats wearing gold chains and gem-studded collars. As it was sung in The Aristocats, “Everybody Wants to be a Cat”…meow!
Categories: absurdities, animal spokepersons, anthropomorphic, furry, furry commercials, television
Tags: the Litter Genie cat, Walter
Comments: 5 Comments
February 25, 2013
– – We’ve all heard of pulled pork, but Geico takes Maxwell the pig to a different level of meaning with this when a police officer pulls his blue convertible over in a recent commercial. Maxwell hands the officer his license and registration as well as his Geico digital insurance card. Now it turns out that the cop doesn’t have a problem with the fact that a pig is driving, but rather the fact that Maxwell’s tail light is out. “Fix it!,” orders the cop before walking away.
At least we haven’t seen an example of species profiling from the unflappable officer…
Categories: absurdities, animal spokepersons, animals, anthropomorphic, Brilliant but twisted, furry, furry commercials, television
Tags: Maxwell pulled over, pig driving a convertible
Comments: 3 Comments
February 19, 2013
– – When an asteroid passes within a cosmic whisker of Earth and a meteorite smashes down in the former Soviet Union, one might not be totally surprised that small, plaque-mounted anthropomorphic fish are becoming more vocal than humans. In a variant of the McDonald’s Fish McBites commercial, we again visit with the young gentleman in the checked plaid shirt, this time in a beautiful, wood-paneled cabin.
Two young women enter the cabin through the door and see the young guy feeding his face. “Hey, what are those?,” asks one of the women, clearly no more of a Rhodes scholar than the guy. Fortunately, the fish themselves are well-able to answer her query, with one responding and then the group of mounted fish launching into a rhythmic cadence of “Fishy, fishy!- – Fish, fish McBites!- -McBites!” Soon all of the trio are munching away on the item, with the guy saying not a word during the whole commercial, even to the women…
…and I thought that fish were reputed to be “brain food!” 
Categories: absurdities, animal spokepersons, animals, anthropomorphic, aquatic, furry commercials, television
Tags: Fish McBites ad, Fish McBites Fish Plaque
Comments: 2 Comments
February 14, 2013
– – Something’s fishy here! A few years back in 2009, McDonald’s produced an irritatingly memorable singing fish commercial, with the fish modeled after the singing “Billy Bass” novelty item, an electronic mounted fish that sang and moved about on its mounting. It was the kind of thing that you got tired of after seeing about twice. The earlier McDonald’s fish commercial could haunt you. “Gimme back that Filet of Fish, give me that fish!,” sang the McDonald’s spokes-fish. It took me some time to get that commercial out of my head…(shudders!)
…and what could be more memorable than a singing fish on a plaque?- -How about fifteen minnow-sized fish on a plaque, all singing together to sell you McDonald’s Fish McBites, now available for only a dollar, and for a limited time only! “Fishy, fishy!,” they sing while a guy in a checked flannel shirt stands there with his mouth open holding a dollar…the fish, they’re back, and are multiplying!
Categories: absurdities, animal spokepersons, aquatic, furry commercials, scalies, television
Tags: Fish McBites Fish Plaque, singing fish
Comments: 2 Comments
February 3, 2013
– – Maxwell the Geico pig continues to evolve; he doesn’t appear to exclaim “Wheee!” anymore, plays with electronics, and apparently can even drive a car. He could use some coaching on relationships with the opposite sex, however, passing up an ideal lover’s lane opportunity with a girl who appears to be hot for his porky body.- -Maxwell, it would seem, is more of a techie than a lover!
In the latest Geico commercial featuring Maxwell, he is stranded in a broken-down convertible car with a rather comely lass, and appears to be fooling with his hand-held device. “Did you just turn your ringer off so no one would interrupt us?,” questions the lady. Maxwell responds that he just used his Geico app to summon a tow truck, his ears rising as he finally perceives that his date wants to “pass the time.” Maxwell has an idea ready to pass the 30-minute waiting interval, and unfortunately it’s not the past-time that the lady apparently desires; no, for Maxwell immediately switches his hand-held to a rousing game of “Fruit Ninja!” The look of disappointment (or whatever) on his date’s eyes is classic as Maxwell enthusiastically launches into the game…
Many questions go unanswered. We are not told how Maxwell’s little legs can reach the car’s pedals, or how his cloven hooves can operate his device, for example…but at least we are spared the messy and probably distasteful details of human/pig relationships, something for which we all can be grateful…although I’m sure that some of our readership can relate to having dated real pigs! Thankfully, no one can refer to Maxwell as a chauvinist pig…
Categories: absurdities, animal spokepersons, animals, anthropomorphic, famous furries, furry art, furry commercials, television
Tags: Maxwell the Geico pig, Maxwell the pig's date
Comments: 2 Comments
February 2, 2013
– – For those not into the almost omnipresent Super Bowl in the U.S. this weekend, the Animal Planet network will air as in past years its “Puppy Bowl” event, complete with new commercials by Subaru of America that target consumers likely to transport canine passengers in a recurring campaign called, “Dog Tested. Dog Approved.” Four of the dog-based ads will also appear on YouTube, specifically titled “On the Lot,” “Tailgate,” “Let’s Talk Financing,” and “Lint Roller.”
The Budweiser Super Bowl ad will again feature their classic Clydesdale horses, which have appeared in 23 Super Bowl ads since 1986. This year’s offering called “Brotherhood” features a 7-day-old foal and his growing relationship with his trainer… 
Categories: animal spokepersons, animals, television
Tags: animal spokesmen, Budweiser's Clydesdales, Subaru's dogs
Comments: 2 Comments
January 20, 2013
– – The Aflac Duck had seemed almost indestructible up to this point…after all, he’s been bonked by soccer balls, whacked with logs, singed by flames, and even dropped into the Grand Canyon. Now the daredevil duck has suffered the unthinkable, involved in an undisclosed accident with ensuing injuries to his wing and beak! In a new series of television commercials, a “doctor” discusses the duck’s disaster in front of reporters, and we only see the familiar fowl as a small fixed image on the screen.
The campaign is to illustrate that if the iconic duck can run afoul of fate, anyone can get hurt. Of course, his Aflac insurance is going to take care of the hospitalized duck’s expenses.- -What else is he gonna do, put them on his bill?!
Categories: animal spokepersons, animals, anthropomorphic, avian, feathered friends, furry commercials, television
Tags: Aflac duck
Comments: 2 Comments
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