Archive for the ‘creature features’ category

Werefoxes…

April 18, 2011

 – – On this night of the full moon, I find it appropriate to post about my fave were-animal, the werefox.  Now don’t get me wrong, I love werewolves dearly…some of my best friends, and all!  With the understandable excitement over werewolves, however, the other were-animals tend to be neglected a bit,  yet fall into the same furry shapeshifting family.

Werefox stories are common to northern China, where they are seen to inhabit the netherworld between the material plane and the unseen dimensions.  They can take human form and mate with normal humans, although such people tend to turn into a zombie-like slave of the werefox;  (–heh, gotta get me some of those!).  Even while in human form, the werefox retains his or her fox tail, which can be a dead give-away when it pops out of clothing!  The werefox can also lose control of its human form when it sleeps or gets good and drunk.  This can pose a major embarrassment.

Werefoxes are not the strongest of the were-animals, and are accordingly not as likely to rip deserving individuals to shreds.  They are rather more inclined to mess with the heads of their intended victims, playing heavy-grade tricks on them or perhaps laying a curse on their sorry asses.  For this reason werefoxes are often associated with sorcery, and in Native American legends sorcerers preferred to shapeshift into this form. – – Can’t say that I blame them!

So support and respect your friendly neighborhood werefox, and give him his due…you may have found a clever and resourceful new friend!


Mysterious Goat Slaughter!

January 5, 2011

– – Over the past two months, more than 300 goats owned by shepherds in Mexico’s Puebla state have been decapitated by someone…or something! As there was reportedly very little blood in the area where the goat bodies have been found, suspicions are again afoot about the chupacabra or some other unidentified animal being the culprit.

Chupacabra sightings often emanate from the Southwest U.S., Puerto Rico, Latin America, and Mexico.  Researchers have speculated that the reported chupacabras of Mexico and Texas may actually be coyote hybrids, although in Mexico groups of peasants have formed watch groups to monitor any possible chupacabra activity in their communities.  With so many incidents, 2010 has been termed by some “the year of the goat sucker.“

Now that’s something I could sink my teeth into…ahahahahaha!

Forest Ghoul!

December 14, 2010

– – Not to be confused with Forrest Gump, it’s time to talk about our ghoul friends, like this one reportedly photographed by a deer hunter on a reserve in Berwick near Morgan City, Louisiana.  The hunter contends that he was lying in wait in the pitch black when this specter with glowing eyes filled his sights.  The mysterious thing jumped from the undergrowth and flashed a look at the camera before vanishing back into the bushes.  The hunter was so spooked he broke his camera, but conveniently retrieved the undamaged memory chip from which this image was supposedly produced.

While creepy, the eyes and limbs of this thing don’t look real to me, and if it isn’t photoshopped, it may be a suit of some sort…don’t bet the rent on the reality of this creature, but I’ll take Halloween over Xmas any day!

“Sharktopus” Arrives!

September 25, 2010

– – We all know that the government does terrible things behind our backs, like the calamitous Plum Island experiment that created yours truly.–Well, it would appear that the Navy has engineered a half-shark, half-octopus killing machine as a super-weapon which, of course, gets out of control as genetically-engineered creatures are prone to do…life would be so dreary if they didn’t!

The sharktopus shows a perverse predilection for beautiful blond women in bikinis, dragging them off boats, beaches, and bungee cords…gotta love the big lug!    He also is not deterred by machine gun fire, otherwise the movie might be over quickly.

Coming from B-movie king Roger Corman and boasting a cheesy theme song,  the absurd, low-budget made-for-tv movie Sharktopus may be a real hoot! –Witness the glory that is Syfy this Saturday night!

“Beast Legends” Is Upon Us!

September 9, 2010

– – You gotta give the Syfy channel credit for trying to  please us, and Beast Legends starting September 9th at 10:00 in my area just might be the ticket!  Billed as an “investigative adventure series,” Legends features a team of a globetrotting animal doctor, a Harvard professor of evolutionary biology, a gifted illustrator, and a mythology maven as they explore the truth behind some of the world’s most renowned creatures.  Your payoff will be a life-like computer-generated model of the creature investigated depicted living in the real world at the end of each show, kinda like the mortal combat simulations shown at the end of Deadliest Warrior matchings.

The show will follow season four of Destination Truth, which could make Thursday night quite a draw on Syfy for our types!- –All hail the mighty Kraken!

“Alien” Prequel Coming…

September 8, 2010

– – The Alien franchise has operated with mixed success since 1979, with in my opinion Alien and Aliens being the best of the lot.- -Well, a prequel and perhaps even two are supposedly coming in 2011 or 2012 (hopefully before Dec. 21st), with Ridley Scott at the helm and the film(s) likely to be shot in 3D.- -We’ll even find out what happened with the “Space Jockey,” that poor alien devil found on Zeta Reticuli!

The prequel will be set in 2085, about 30 years before Sigourney Weaver made her first memorable appearance as Ellen Ripley with the Nostromo, and will in the words of Scott be “…really tough, really nasty.”

…and that’s just how it should be!- –Count me in!

Fact or Faked?

August 1, 2010

– – For  those of you hungry for a MonsterQuest fix, Syfy’s new show Fact or Faked:  Paranormal Files may offer you an alternative.  The show has been described as what Fox Mulder might have done after leaving the X-Files; in fact, the show features former FBI agent Ben Hansen.  Adding to the diversified investigative team is a scientist, a journalist, an effects specialist, a photography expert, and a stunt expert who explore video submissions and famous paranormal footage to determine which can be validated or debunked through experimentation.

Topics investigated are a mixed bag that include UFO’s, ghosts, cryptids, and unexplained phenomenon.  A lot of grainy videos are screened by the team in a “situation room” to weed out the obvious fakes and determine which cases are worthy of further investigation.  While it’s too early to tell if this series will be a hit, if you liked Ghost Hunters, Paranormal State, and Destination Truth, you’ll probably like this one.   Fact or Faked is a banquet, so take what you like, and leave the rest of it lying on the buffet table…we think it merits a look!

Summer Rerun Season…

May 28, 2010

– – When MonsterQuest has a re-run marathon fest, I can usually tell by the number of renewed hits that I get on my old posts on past episodes of The Quest. It’s the good episodes that get the hits…like myself, most people aren’t as interested in installments on wild dogs, rats, or bees.

So mundane and unexciting were some of these episodes, in fact, that we can bring you this picture of a MonsterQuest reject…in fact, he might have been more interesting than some of the episodes that aired!


Giving the Devil His Due…

May 6, 2010

– – Stories of the Jersey Devil have been in oral circulation since 1735, making it possibly the oldest reported “monster” in America.  Two schools of thought exist about the creature, one holding that it is truly supernatural…the “son of the devil,” as suggested by the original Mother Leeds account.  A second explanation for the creature holds that it is some sort of mutated animal that has not yet been identified by science.  Supporting this latter contention is the fact that the Pine Barrens location reported as the Devil’s stomping grounds has been known to have produced genetic malformations in reptiles and mammals, including humans, possibly due to heavy metal or other mineral deposits. Some abnormalities afflicting animals in this location have included odd colorations, extra appendages, and even extra heads.

Native Americans in petroglyphs, some dating back thousands of years, depicted an entity that has reptilian features.  In spite of this and the extensive oral history, the Jersey Devil has been treated satirically, making many reluctant to step forward with their beliefs due to fear of ridicule.  More serious study and treatment of the Jersey Devil may be fostered by a recently opened exhibit at the Paranormal Museum in Asbury Park, N.J. that features a variety of artifacts, including reproductions of a supposed Jersey Devil skull, drawings, and other artifacts.

Despite the lack of hard evidence, the Pinelands area of New Jersey covers more than a million acres…a perfect environment for an unknown animal to hide in!

Metal Dinos!

May 4, 2010

– – In Finland, Barney meets heavy metal in Hevisaurus, a group of long-haired costumed reptiles in leather and spiked bracelets who perform largely to  kiddie audiences.   Billed as the world’s only Jurassic metal band, the five performers wear elaborate costumes made of reindeer skin dyed to look green and treated to look scaly.

Metal music has gone mainstream in Finland, and is even played in churches...and if they meet Barney, I think he’ll be extinct…