Archive for the ‘commercials’ category

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Progressive’s “Pets: Secret Keepers”

December 1, 2019


It’s hard to imagine Progressive’s insurance agents at home or about, when they are not doing insurance-agent things, and this “Secret Keepers” commercial provides that rare glimpse into their more mundane and vulnerable sides.  Who could imagine, for example, that the formidable Flo could get all weepy and emotional over watching someone miss a spare on televised bowling?  Her dog is nearby, seeing everything and revealing nothing…

Then there is the hapless Jamie, shown ironing wearing nothing but his Progressive apron, his Great Dane silent witness to it all.  Another  male associate is submerged for some reason in a bathtub filled with ice, his cat just down the hall.  There’s also the female associate doing the primal scream thing in a car while her dog watches silently; “I feel much better!,” confesses the woman after her eardrum-bursting yell.

Because pets see everything that we do and never say a thing, our “secret keepers” are covered for free in Progressive’s auto insurance policies, you see…and their silence can indeed be golden, for what they know and have seen could be quite embarrassing if not downright incriminating…

 

Categories: advertising, animal presence, animals, commercials, furry, furry commercials, television
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Mayhem’s “Elf on the Shelf”

November 21, 2019

What could be more seasonally festive than Dean Winters as Mayhem performing the Elf on the Shelf routine?  Beginning with an idyllic and well-decorated living room Christmas scene with subtle background music playing, we are shown the absurdly human-sized Mayhem elf in cutesy elf-attire sitting on the proverbial shelf, one which was clearly not designed to support his weight…

“I’m the ‘Elf on the Shelf’…and thanks to your ‘woodworking skills,’ this is about to get a whole less jolly!,” cautions Mayhem. There is an ominous cracking sound, and then down comes the shelf, with Mayhem and all…electronics sputter and crackle on the floor in their death throes around him, the costly gifts now ruined.  A dog on a chair whines as Mayhem laughs and reminds us, “and unless these are protected by Allstate, this little mess-up is going to cost you big!”  The narrator’s voice then kicks in, telling us that with an Allstate protection plan offered through Walmart, your electronics can be protected from breaks, spills, and other Yuletide mishaps.  

Prone on the floor, Mayhem then fields an electronic device of his own to call out.  “Elf down, elf down!,” he advises…and after being hit with Xmas promotions since October, I’m ready for a Mayhem Xmas special!  Maybe this Mayhem Elf and the pre-redemption Grinch could get together for a feature-length film for the Xmas-weary, perhaps titled Revenge of the Consumers!  And how about a sequel to this commercial, like Elf in the ER? Merriment ensues at General Hospital as doctors try to treat an uninsured, supernatural being dressed in absurd, felt clothing who calamity follows…

 

Categories: absurdities, advertising, Brilliant but twisted, commercials, television
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Allstate’s “Mayhem: Mother-in-Law” 

November 20, 2019

Many of us have had the experience of driving with a distracting or troublesome passenger, some so irritating that you can barely drive for wanting to choke the life out of them.  Well, Dean Winters and Tina Fey have another Allstate commercial gem that probes the potentially vexing relationship between a mother/daughter-in-law, with “Mom” judgemental and dispensing lots of unwanted advice…

Winters, who can play anything from a car thief to a raccoon to a cat, morphs easily into the mother-in-law role, wearing earrings, applying blush and lipstick, and mercilessly needling the driving Tina Fey with caustic and critical barbs about her driving and other things.  “I’m your mother-in-law,”  Winters advises viewers at the onset, “and I have to question your every move!”  

Question this mother-in-law certainly does, such as “Do you have to drive this slow?”  Turns out that Tina Fey is observing driving safely in conjunction with the Allstate Drivewise app to get insurance discounts.  “How did you make someone I love?!,”  questions Tina Fey.  The nastiness continues…“My son always did say that you were the ‘safe choice,’ ” carps Mother Mayhem.  “And that’s the nicest thing you’ve ever said to me!,” replies the long-suffering daughter-in-law.

After admonishing Tina Fey to try her lipstick as it was her son’s favorite color, Mayhem can’t resist asking her daughter-in-law why she drives like an old lady.  “You’re an old lady!,”  Tina Fey reminds her meddlesome passenger.- – Ahh, family!  Blessed be the ties that bind…and gag!

 

 

 

Categories: advertising, Brilliant but twisted, commercials, television, twisted reality
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Allstate’s “Mayhem: St. Bernard” Commercial

November 18, 2019


Don’t worry; Foxsylvania hasn’t gotten into some kind of kinky sexual thing here.  It’s just Dean Winters as Mayhem impersonating a 70-pound St. Bernard dog as he tries to distract driver Tina Fey as she resolutely pilots her vehicle. All of the uncontrolled puppy behaviors are depicted; affectionately licking his owner (after eating his own poop, fortunately not shown), thrashing materials around with his mouth, and barking out the window at other (real) dogs in cars…

…and why does Tina Fey have nerves of steel?  She’s using Allstate’s “Drivewise” app to qualify for a discount as a safe driver, and Mayhem’s “tongue on cheek” performance isn’t going to deter her.  He is, after all, just a baby…and Mayhem may have met his match, although he certainly seems to be enjoying himself…

 

 

Categories: absurdities, advertising, Brilliant but twisted, commercials, furry, furry commercials, television, twisted reality
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The Sparkle Fairy in, “More Towels, More Ribs”

November 12, 2019


I’ve always considered the Sparkle Fairy to be in that rarified class of people (entities?) who are cool yet disquieting at the same time. Progressive insurance’s Flo I would include in this grouping, although she lacks supernatural powers.  I’m not sure that I’d like to encounter the Sparkle Fairy in my supermarket or elsewhere, although she seems mostly harmless.  To give proper credit, however, she wears blue really well, and some people even consider her hawt.  I also appreciate her general vibe and “fish-out-of-water” characteristics.

In a recent commercial, a guy is pigging out on ribs, a messy meal, and wishes for more paper towels to assist in this.–Presto!  The Sparkle Fairy appears, and announces that her product now offers 200 more sheets than a leading competitor’s brand.  “I wish I had 200 more ribs!,” pines the hungry guy.  Obligingly, the Sparkle Fairy makes those ribs appear on his table.  Smitten, the guy proposes marriage on the spot.  “I’m into Giants,” advises the fairy matter-of-factly.  To each their own, I suppose, and who am I to judge?

In my twisted mind, I can envision a paranormal investigation show going in search of the Sparkle Fairy and perhaps baiting a trap with paper towels. When thus captured, the fairy’s anger is unleashed and serious dark enchantments ensue, with many turned into newts. Hilarity ensues…

Categories: absurdities, advertising, Brilliant but twisted, commercials, Mythology, television, twisted reality
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Movie Night with Casper the Friendly Ghost…

October 21, 2019

I’m not a big fan of Casper the Friendly Ghost.  It’s not that I have anything against him, it’s just that I prefer my ghosts to be scary if not outright terrifying.  Casper may be friendly, but I find that annoying, and so he is to me in this Geico commercial, in which young couple Kurt and Jill are preparing to enjoy a movie in the living room of their new house…

“I can’t believe it,” says Jill.  “You can’t believe that our house is haunted by ‘Casper the Friendly Ghost?,'” replies Kurt.  At that moment, Casper enters the scene, cheerily greets the couple, notices the movie, and enthusiastically invites himself to go get some snacks.  He then returns with popcorn, announces the other varieties of it that are available, and sits or hovers there on the sofa back between them, stuffing his face and making a pig of himself.  Jill then clarifies herself to say that she can’t believe how much money they’ve saved on their car insurance with Geico.

Perhaps the couple could invest some of those savings to hire Ghostbusters to get rid of this pest, who even chews loudly.  This ghost is a milquetoast, not a proper haunt, and his cuteness gets cloying very quickly…

 

Categories: absurdities, advertising, cartoons, commercials, paranormal, television
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d-CON Refillable Bait Commercial…

October 17, 2019

d-CON is in the strange position of making a product that most people hope not to need, but want to buy if they need it, and in advertising for their rat and mice control products have now as in the past taken a whimsical approach.  In the past they have shown a clearly human actor clad in an obvious mouse costume, in one ad being told by a woman that he “disgusts (her),” to which the mouse responds, “Prove it!”  

In a recent commercial, we’re shown instead some almost cute puppet mice at a social gathering, most likely set in a kitchen.  The hostess mouse remarks to a guest that she sees her guest has found the snacks, that mouse responding that “she must have the recipe!”  The hostess replies that everyone thinks she made the treats, but really they were made by d-CON.  There is then a thunking sound as the guest falls to the floor, leaving the clueless hostess calling for her friend, “Judy?”

Mice love d-CON to death, you see…and isn’t it curious how people love cartoon mice, but not the genuine article in their homes?

 

Categories: absurdities, advertising, Brilliant but twisted, commercials, furry, furry commercials, television, twisted reality
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Geico’s “The Gecko Explores an Old Attic”

October 6, 2019



Attics may be disquieting places in which the stored past lives on, even intruding on the present. Mannequins can be creepy because they imitate a life that they lack, a horrific potential that has been explored in Twilight Zone stories among others.  As part of their GEICOween series, the Gecko takes a new homeowner into the attic of his recent house acquisition, convinced that doing so can reveal the home’s charm in what has been left behind.  While the Gecko discovers a music box complete with a tiny ballerina, the focal point of this attic is a table around which are seated a number of broken mannequins, their faces frozen in a variety of peculiar and even disturbing expressions as they partake of a tea party of the damned…

Observing these house haunts is a bit too much for the new owner of the abode, who beats a hasty retreat from further exploration of his discovery.  Perhaps in the Rod Serling tradition, these mannequins each have stories to tell, and lives that they live when not under observation.  I’d join their little attic party for tea and tales, wouldn’t you?

The inference is that while Geico may not be able to help you with malevolent spirits in your home, they can assist you with homeowners and renters insurance.  Just keep an eye on those mannequins, OK?- –Boo!

 

Categories: advertising, commercials, television, twisted reality
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GEICOween is coming!

October 1, 2019


In a series of Halloween-themed commercials, Geico insurance introduces us to Griselda the witch, a witchy but wonderfully hip witch who builds on traditional stereotypes to in one commercial host a karaoke cooking show, complete with bubbling cauldron in which angel sneezes and a thumb drive are added to the brew!

But I digress…in one wonderful, furry-themed commercial, two female college students have taken in Griselda as a compromise roommate, one seeking someone who can help with the cooking, and the other wanting someone who likes cats.  Griselda fits the bill nicely, spoon-feeding one of the students soup that transforms her into an anthropomorphic cat complete with cat ears, facial features, and furry forearms… I’d drink of that brew anytime! While her cooking may be questionable, Geico can really help these students with renters insurance, we’re told.

Anyways, Griselda is a real hoot as is her furry creation, and deserves to be a breakout  character.  We Halloween lovers thank you, Geico…watch for yourself, and meow!

 

(tip o’ the pen to Carycomic for the idea for this post!)

 

 

Categories: absurdities, advertising, anthropomorphic, Brilliant but twisted, commercials, furry, furry commercials, humor, television, twisted reality
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Allstate’s “Mayhem Cat” Commercial…

September 14, 2019

Dean Winters is back as the Allstate Mayhem guy, a role he plays to perfection…and he’s no stranger to playing animals as well, having played a raccoon in the attic in an earlier outing (below)…

This time he’s portraying a cat, and the absurdity and whimsy of his portrayal is enhanced by the fact that he’s neither in costume nor CGI enhanced, but simply appearing as a normally dressed adult human male adopting feline mannerisms, poses, and behaviors. 

“I’m your cat,” announces Winters, “and ever since you brought me home that day, I’ve been plotting to destroy you,” he declares calmly, flashing back to his batting away the petting hand of his male owner on that first day. We are show Winters doing a variety of iconic cat-things, like playing with kitty-toys while lying on his owner’s couch, and spitting a mouse onto their sleeping face.  “I’ve been sizing you up, calculating your every move,” Winters shares as he peers from a cat-condo and rides a Roomba.  “You think this is love?  This is a billion years of tiger DNA, waiting to pounce!” Eventually a faucet left running by the Winters-cat overflows the sink, causing the upstairs bathroom to collapse down to the floor below.  His feline agenda is proceeding nicely…

“If you have the wrong type of insurance, you could be stuck coughing up the cash for this,” advises Winters as he coughs up bird feathers by a now vacant cage. “So get Allstate, and you could be better protected from Mayhem, like meow,” he closes, dipping his fingers into a cat-food bowl bearing the name “Mayhem,” and laughing in a rather sinister fashion, his outfit complete with a collar and tag…the devil is in the details, you see!

 

 

 

Categories: absurdities, advertising, animal spokepersons, anthropomorphic, Brilliant but twisted, commercials, furry, furry commercials, furry perspectives, television
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