Archive for the ‘animals’ category

In the Rut State of Mind…

October 18, 2010

– -It’s “Deer Gone Wild” time, with mating season or “the rut” having begun last week and ending in late November.- -Yup, deer will be chasing one another in fits of passion    (Don’t look, Ethel!), making the roads in states and areas with significant deer populations a bit more hazardous.  Deer are not known for their prudence on roadways, anyways!

Nearly 50 percent of vehicle crashes statewide in Pennsylvania involving deer occur during the rut, according to the Pennsylvania Dept. of Transportation.

“You have males chasing females; females running away from males; males fighting males for females,” said one naturalist.  “They’re not in their right minds.”

Ahh, love!- -A fine insanity!

Too Many Cats…

October 14, 2010

– – How many cats are too many?–Well, certainly 77, especially if you’re keeping them in two cars.  I swear that I am not making this up…

Police in Bennington, Vermont cited two women for animal cruelty after finding 77 cats living in two cars.  Plates of food were inside the cars, and some of the cats had fecal matter matted to their fur.  One of the cats was found dead in the trunk of one of the cars Friday.

The women charged owned two of the cats, and were apparently looking for homes for the rest.  Police investigated after someone complained about seeing people sleeping in the cars with the cats.  Prosecutors will consider whether to upgrade the civil citations against the two women to criminal charges…

The Japanese Kappa Monster on Destination Truth

October 9, 2010

– –  Once feared as an evil cross between a demon and a turtle, the Kappa has become somewhat of a Japanese national mascot, more loved than feared and depicted on such innocuous items as lunchboxes.   The darker incarnation of the Kappa, however, is blamed for the disappearance of livestock and even children, prompting a segment on a Destination Truth investigation.

Journeying to the location of a recent reported Kappa sighting near Tono, Josh Gates and his team set up infrared and trap cameras to capture any images of the elusive beast, and broke into two groups to sweep the area.  They saw a large dark shape in the water,  which was later regarded by experts to be a large fish or perhaps an eel.  Also checking out skeletal remains of a reported Kappa foot at a Japanese shrine, the team returned with photographs of the same,  which were regarded by a mammalogist to be bones of a canine.

The conclusion?–Evidence for the Kappa is not convincing, and the creature exists at the juncture of folklore and animal misidentification…


Sheep Impersonator Arrested!

October 5, 2010

– – Animal impersonations tend not to win many talent competitions, especially when they’re offered unsolicited in the middle of the night… and so one boozy German who regaled his neighbors by bleating like a sheep and doing other animal impressions, some for as long as twenty minutes,  found himself  arrested in the Bavarian town of Coburg on Sunday.

The 49-year-old man had an extremely high blood alcohol content, and became “unreasonable and aggressive” when police tried to get him to cease his bleating…I guess his impersonations were pretty baaad, and neighbors wanted to be counting sheep rather than hearing them…

The Flintstones Turn 50…

October 3, 2010

– – I’m more a fan of The Jetsons myself, but The Flintstones turned 50 at the end of last month.  Owing much to “The Honeymooners,” the Bedrock gang in turn set the stage for the success of more adult-styled cartoons such as The Simpsons, Family Guy, King of the Hill, and many others.

Running from 1960 to 1966, The Flintstones didn’t start their popular “Meet the Flintstones” theme until their third season. – -And who can forget the infamous commercials of the cartoon characters smoking, since the show was sponsored in part by Winston?

My personal cast fave Dino (pronounced dee-no), the Flintstone pet dinosaur, was not mentioned by name until the fourth episode, and in an apparent flashback story sequence of episode 18 was portrayed as very anthropomorphic indeed, complete with powers of speech! 

The Quiznos Kittens…

October 1, 2010

– – There are some clever and innovative commercials featuring furry characters, such as the Geico ad with Maxwell the pig.  Other commercials with furry characters do not serve the fandom well, such as the one with a trio of kittens screeching “five-four-three” to the tune of Three Blind Mice.

The kitten “Singamals” appear in a rhythm-challenged brass band, singing very badly about the joys of the fast food franchise’s Value Menu.  Internet condemnation of the ad is almost universal, with one commentator stating that the ad “is worse than one can possibly imagine,” and another saying that the kittens resemble “brain-damaged rejects from karaoke night.”  These kittens get old very quickly!

Not all Quiznos commercials have been horrendous; I rather liked a 2003 ad called Raised by Wolves which featured Jim Parsons of The Big Bang Theory as a businessman flashing back to suckling at the teat of a Siberian Husky.  While the kittens aren’t creepy, they certainly get annoying in short order… 

–Frankenfish?

September 29, 2010

– – It kinda feels like a Syfy movie offering, these tales of genetically-engineered animals for human consumption.   A fast-growing Atlantic salmon developed by AquaBounty Technologies in Massachusetts contains an extra growth gene that makes it grow twice as fast as conventional farm-raised salmon, and is the first such genetically-engineered animal to be promoted for a food source.

The FDA says that studies conducted by AquaBounty show that the gene is safe for the salmon, safe for humans, and safe for the environment.  Some scientists and consumer groups say, however, that the agency should slow down and get more information, citing concerns over potential consumer allergies to such fish and questions about what would happen if such genetically-modified fish escaped from fish farms into the wild, there to mate with wild fish, out-compete with them for food, or irreversibly change their environments.   Soon, such fish might be running for elected office…

It all sounds a bit fishy…and there’s gotta be a bad horror movie in this somewhere! 

Kitchen Samurai Defeats Bear!

September 27, 2010

– – When a Montana woman found a 200-pound black bear attacking her 12-year-old collie in her backyard early Thursday after midnight, she screamed to divert the bear’s attention from her dog.  The bear then charged the woman, taking a swipe at her with its paw and tearing her jeans (of course you know, this means war)!

Driven backwards, the woman then jumped back and grasped the nearest object on the kitchen counter inside the doorway.   Desperate times call for desperate measures, and so the woman grabbed one of the most loathed vegetables that the Creator in his wisdom ever put on the face of the earth…a zucchini!

Yes, and it was a big zucchini, too, a 12-incher harvested earlier from her garden!  Flinging the dreaded vegetable at the bear from a distance estimated at 3 feet (point blank range), the woman bopped the bruin on the top of his head, and he wisely fled!   Probably the bear feared that he might be forced to eat the horrid thing…that oughta teach him!

(…I don’t like zucchinis, but I do respect them!)

“Sharktopus” Arrives!

September 25, 2010

– – We all know that the government does terrible things behind our backs, like the calamitous Plum Island experiment that created yours truly.–Well, it would appear that the Navy has engineered a half-shark, half-octopus killing machine as a super-weapon which, of course, gets out of control as genetically-engineered creatures are prone to do…life would be so dreary if they didn’t!

The sharktopus shows a perverse predilection for beautiful blond women in bikinis, dragging them off boats, beaches, and bungee cords…gotta love the big lug!    He also is not deterred by machine gun fire, otherwise the movie might be over quickly.

Coming from B-movie king Roger Corman and boasting a cheesy theme song,  the absurd, low-budget made-for-tv movie Sharktopus may be a real hoot! –Witness the glory that is Syfy this Saturday night!

Hold That Tiger!

September 24, 2010

– – Tigers tend to be thought of as jungle creatures, but a British television crew filmed a population of “lost” tigers living at a higher altitude than any others known.  These cats were spotted roaming in the remote Himalayan nation of Bhutan at an altitude of 13,450 feet!

While the number of tigers has plunged to fewer to 3,200 from 100,000 over the past century, countries where wild tigers range hope to double their numbers by the year 2022…