– – Something’s fishy here! A few years back in 2009, McDonald’s produced an irritatingly memorable singing fish commercial, with the fish modeled after the singing “Billy Bass” novelty item, an electronic mounted fish that sang and moved about on its mounting. It was the kind of thing that you got tired of after seeing about twice. The earlier McDonald’s fish commercial could haunt you. “Gimme back that Filet of Fish, give me that fish!,” sang the McDonald’s spokes-fish. It took me some time to get that commercial out of my head…(shudders!)
…and what could be more memorable than a singing fish on a plaque?- -How about fifteen minnow-sized fish on a plaque, all singing together to sell you McDonald’s Fish McBites, now available for only a dollar, and for a limited time only! “Fishy, fishy!,” they sing while a guy in a checked flannel shirt stands there with his mouth open holding a dollar…the fish, they’re back, and are multiplying!
– – Thanks to the Super Bowl commercial for Wheat Thins, we now know what the Big Foot secret agenda is; they want to steal into our kitchens under cover of darkness, and abscond with our snack crackers! The only defense against this tactic is to sit in the blackness ourselves with night vision goggles, and be prepared to grapple with them! It’s the manly and right thing to do…
– – Goats tend to be slighted, and really don’t get the attention that they deserve. One crosses a goat at their own peril…or some might infer from the “Goat 4 Sale” commercial by Doritos featured on the Super Bowl. 
– – Maxwell the Geico pig continues to evolve; he doesn’t appear to exclaim “Wheee!” anymore, plays with electronics, and apparently can even drive a car. He could use some coaching on relationships with the opposite sex, however, passing up an ideal lover’s lane opportunity with a girl who appears to be hot for his porky body.- -Maxwell, it would seem, is more of a techie than a lover!
– – Witches could use a good spin doctor to handle their bad PR problem; they’re often portrayed as ugly and evil. Hollywood has also put forth a number of doctored and rehashed variations lately on classic fairy tales, with Red Riding Hood one of the most common. In this vein, Hansel and Gretel: Witch Hunters will be coming your way soon, conceived as an action fantasy sequel to the tale of two kids who stumble into a candy-covered witch house in the woods where they are taken prisoner and almost wind up consumed.
– – Seems like everyone’s a critic these days, even Fancy Bear from the FreeCreditScore commercial! It appears that you’re just not safe from having a home invasion by a bowler-hat wearing, cane and moustache-sporting bear in a dress jacket who criticizes your taste in home decor. “May I respond negatively about your porcelain poodle?,” interjects the well-dressed ursine intruder, disdainfully holding up the objectionable artifact. “This should be in the trash!,” he huffs. The commercial closes with Fancy Bear playing a piano piece while the properly scolded human couple sit listening on the couch. 
– – We’ve had the movie, Snakes on a Plane, and now we have Maxwell the Pig in a commercial set on a plane, where two flight attendants are after him to turn off what they think is his “little word game.”- -Well, it turns out that Maxwell is actually using his Geico application to pay his bill, detailing a host of other potential functions which the flight attendants can’t quite swallow, one remarking that she’ll believe the accounting of the app’s functionality “when pigs fly.” 
– – Even when you are out in the woods in the darkness of night, you can apparently find attached to a tree a convenient brightly-illuminated medicine cabinet, filled with a wise, zen-like squirrel who will counsel the gastric-afflicted that “many hot dogs are within you,” and provide pepto bismol to go, in a convenient use-anywhere vial! 
– – It’s challenging, but not impossible to be a Halloween-centered person during Xmas season as I am; it’s all a matter of perspective. Many of you have probably seen the classic Campbell’s Xmas commercial when a friendly fir tree gently opens the window of an invitingly warm kitchen, extends a branch through the opening to the delight of a cherubic boy inside, helps itself to some green bean casserole, withdraws with it, and then essentially becomes ablaze with light as the perfect Xmas tree.- -All is calm, all is bright, right?
– – Sadly, even NASA has found it necessary to debunk the reputed end of the world hysteria that some believe is suggested by the Mayan calendar. The Near-Earth Objects Program at NASA has explained away many of the most frequently cited doomsday scenarios for 2012. 
FOXSYLVANIA 
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