Archive for the ‘twisted reality’ category
March 29, 2019
I had thought that last November’s KFC commercial featuring a Colonel Sanders impersonator dancing with a human-sized bottle of Mrs. Butterworth syrup was a once-and-done thing, but in a companion piece commercial airing currently, the Colonel is back, complete with a misty, bedroom-eyes type expression as he meets Mrs. Butterworth in a marble hallway while a Celine Dion ballad plays. I know that they say “the South shall rise again,” but this is ridiculous!
Mrs. Butterworth appears to make the first move as the impossible couple stare into each other’s faces and the Colonel caresses her molded plastic cheek, probably thinking of all the syrupy goodness contained within…then the couple lean towards one another as a preliminary to a kiss which thankfully, we don’t get to see!
I don’t know what will happen next, and frankly prefer not to go there. Some things are best left to the imagination, and I cringe to think of a Sanders/Butterworth union. Perhaps in the aftermath, however, a horror writer could pen an installment called Children of the Syrup. It would not be suitable for children or sensitive individuals, and viewer discretion is advised…
Categories: absurdities, advertising, bizarre, Brilliant but twisted, commercials, fantasy, humor, television, twisted reality
Tags: Colonel Sanders and Mrs.Butterworth, The Most Delicious Union
Comments: 8 Comments
March 26, 2019
In a hokey but charmingly surreal commercial, Johnsonville Jeff is eating his breakfast sausage out in the deep woods when he is approached by a talking raccoon asking about his meal. In the shorter version of the ad, Jeff also interacts with a wolf and a turkey, whereas the longer version additionally adds a squirrel and a porcupine. Most notably the wolf asks the man in the longer version where he learned how to talk to animals. “Books,” replies Jeff in a deadpan fashion, as if there was really nothing remarkable about the encounter; he’s kind of like Dr. Doolittle in hunting garb. They all have a good laugh together at the end, with the wild turkey practically loosing control of himself…
Johnsonville Sausage incorporates employee input in all phases of their operation, including this commercial which was conceived and is starred in by an actual long-term company employee. Since without the animal presence this commercial would consist of ho-hum talk about sausage, we’ll listen to anything if an animal presents it!
Categories: advertising, anthropomorphic, Brilliant but twisted, commercials, fantasy, furry, furry commercials, television, twisted reality
Tags: Johnsonville forest animals, Johnsonville Jeff and Forest Friends
Comments: 1 Comment
March 18, 2019
For many years now, insurance companies like Geico and Progressive have been producing clever and memorable commercials to tout and lure us to their services. Arriving a bit late to the commercial fray, Liberty Mutual has now produced commercials that incorporate an animal representative in the rather unlikely character of an emu…
These ads invoke the “buddy cop” series of the 1970’s, exemplified by such shows as Starsky and Hutch; Robert Blake’s series Beretta even included a cockatoo as Beretta’s companion.
In the Liberty Mutual commercials, the bird becomes even more of an active partner, riding shotgun with his human partner Doug while wearing aviator sunglasses! Called the LiMu Emu, this bird rocks, although in the Reflections ad he does have a bit of a problem interacting with his own image in a window glass, showing those bobbing, weaving, and pecking behaviors that birds sometimes manifest when confronted with reflections that they consider to be another bird. Partner Doug explains that the LiMu Emu spends so much time time interacting with humans on insurance customization that he doesn’t know quite how to respond to another bird, but that he’ll “figure it out.”
Now I know how to distinguish my own reflection, but do confess to a weakness with distractions posed by shiny things. At any rate, we can rely on the new dynamic duo of the LiMu Emu and Doug, and as Beretta might have reminded us, “Keep your eye on the sparrow…”
Categories: advertising, animal elements, animals, anthropomorphic, Brilliant but twisted, commercials, feathered friends, furry, furry commercials, television, twisted reality
Tags: Liberty Mutual emu, LiMu Emu
Comments: 5 Comments
February 28, 2019
After nine episodes, The Masked Singer concluded its first season on February 27th, that episode clocking in at an inflated two hours. The first hour was a recap of the contestants previously unmasked and eliminated, leading down to the three finalists of Monster, Bee, and Peacock. My enthusiasm for the series dwindled when Rabbit (Joey Fatone) was eliminated in the semi-finals, which I think was caused by his later selection of materials, none of which generated the excitement of his first performance of “Livin’ La Vida Loca.” No one really wanted to hear Rabbit sing “My Girl” or perform a country number, although he reportedly remained in character even when on breaks during rehearsals, and I felt that he and Peacock best incorporated dance and stage presence into their performances. Perhaps these guys could continue to perform as their costumed characters; I’d go to a psychotic Rabbit concert!
I was rather surprised that Bee (Gladys Knight) came in third, with the Peacock (Donny Osmond) coming in second…this guy is an underrated performer! Monster (T-Pain) won the top honors with his soulful croonings, and seemed to be a sentimental favorite despite being nearly eliminated in an early round.
The series was weird stuff, but we are living in strange times for which the antidote may be this kind of freaky escapism…and by the way, The Masked Singer has been renewed for a second season, to begin at an unspecified date…
Categories: anthropomorphic, fantasy, furry, television, twisted reality
Tags: "Masked Singer" finale
Comments: 3 Comments
February 21, 2019
I, for one, am not surprised that the Banana Splits gang are finally going homicidal; they always were rather surreal, shady, and oddly disturbing, and one knew that there had to be something more darkly seething under the surface than what they wanted you to see.
For those of you who just fell off the turnip truck, the Banana Splits were an oddball creation of Sid and Marty Krofft, and were people costumed in cheap fursuits with unchanging and unmovable faces that presented themselves as being a gorilla, elephant, dog, and lion on kiddie television episodes that aired from 1968 to 1970, continuing afterwards in syndication for a decade. They were supposedly a rock band, and a typical segment might involve them running madly about before running into one another and falling down. Their theme song was extremely annoying, but an ear worm that could play inside your head, driving you to madness. It was the ’60’s, after all, and we didn’t know any better.
Anyways, the Syfy channel is bringing back the Banana Splits for a movie in which a boy and his parents go to a taping of the old show when things take a turn for the worse, and the body count starts rising. I’ve always suspected that this moment would be coming…
Categories: anthropomorphic, furry, television, twisted reality
Tags: Banana Splits movie, Banana Splits on Syfy
Comments: 6 Comments
February 14, 2019
The Butterfinger brand has been bought out from Nestle by Ferrero, who have amped up the brand and its slogan with an alien presence in a new commercial. The trademark admonition that “Nobody better lay a finger on my Butterfinger” has been said by many over the years, including Bart Simpson. Last uttered in 2012, the slogan has now been updated to “Nobody lays a finger on my better Butterfinger!“
In the frenetic ad, a yellow and blue alien (Butterfinger colors) escapes from a lab, helps himself to a dusty Corvette, and goes on a thrill ride with a hitchhiker he picks up who happens to be selling alien T-shirts! The wild ride ends with the alien using his telekinetic powers to help himself to a Butterfinger bar, after which he proclaims the revised slogan.
I saw this commercial for the first time after watching a recording of a Project Bluebook episode, and then seeing LaToya Jackson revealed as the Alien character on S1/Ep7 of The Masked Singer. I think that the powers that be are trying to tell me something…
(Tip o’ the pen to Cary Comic for the idea for this post!)
Categories: absurdities, aliens, Brilliant but twisted, commercials, paranormal, sci fi, television, twisted reality
Tags: Better Butterfinger commercial, Butterfinger with alien ad
Comments: 1 Comment
January 10, 2019
I was not disappointed! The Rabbit rocked the house on S1, Ep2 of The Masked Singer with a rousing rendition of Ricky Martin’s Livin’ la Vida Loca. With his glowing red eyes, straitjacket-type outfit, and head-twitching mannerisms, The Rabbit conveyed a touch of madness and menace, winning over Alien with a great stage presence and a lot of kinetic energy, together with that “fresh from the asylum” vibe that he had going on…kinda like Michael Jackson by way of The Joker. Rabbit was deeply into his character, and I respect that. Perhaps he’ll perform White Rabbit by Jefferson Airplane in a future match-up…
In other match-ups, Raven easily beat Pineapple, who was voted the weakest performance of the night and voted off. The identity of Pineapple? — Tommy Chong, who is known for comedy but hardly singing and dancing. Raven’s outfit was dark and foreboding, with almost steampunk and horror elements, and she sang Rainbow by Kesha…
In the third round, 
Poodle sang a strong version of Pat Benatar’s Heartbreaker, but lost to Bee who performed Chandalier by Sia. Bee is apparently a veteran performer who has been doing her thing since the 1950’s! When the menagerie convenes in weeks to come, we’ll be seeing both of them again in someplace where your fantasies meet your nightmares. This is weird but fun stuff, and I’m in for the ride… 
Categories: anthropomorphic, avian, Brilliant but twisted, furry, furry-like, television, twisted reality
Tags: The Masked Singer, The Rabbit on Masked Singer
Comments: 3 Comments
January 8, 2019
I’m not unsympathetic to the idea of Emotional Support Animals, although some people have pressed the limits of what may be considered such an animal, and where it may be appropriate to take them. As a case in point we have a Credit Karma commercial where a female passenger on an airline notices a male in the same seat row sporting a blobfish on his lap, who he introduces as Harold, an emotional support animal that he enlisted when his credit rating caused damage to his self-concept. The woman advises the man that he can gain tips on improving his credit rating from Credit Karma, a thought which so excites the man that he accidentally drops Harold on the aircraft floor. “He’ll be all right,” reassures the man. “He’s a bottom feeder!“
Now blobfish are real, a deep sea creature found in waters 2,000 to 3,900 feet deep off mainland Australia, Tasmania, and New Zealand. A few years back, they were voted “the Ugliest Animal in the World.” Blobfish are easier on the eyes if you see them in their natural habitat, since the appearance that people associate with them is caused by decompression damage as the specimens are brought to the surface. So be kind to the blobfish, as you’re not seeing them at their best. Harold could certainly not live out of water, even while he appears to move slightly during the commercial.
Sadly, no one claims blobfish as their spirit animal. These guys just can’t seem to get a break. And when it comes to emotional support animals, I’m inseparable from my inner fox…
Categories: absurdities, advertising, animal oddities, anomalies, aquatic, Brilliant but twisted, commercials, creature features, furry, television, twisted reality
Tags: Blobfish, Credit Karma blobfish
Comments: 5 Comments
November 25, 2018
A comedy-horror series is a rare and wonderful thing, especially if it’s done well. If you’ve missed this gem, you may want to check out Stan Against Evil, now in its third season on the IFC network. The show takes place in the fictional New Hampshire town of Willard’s Mill, which was the site of witch burnings in the late 17th century. As a result of that history, strange and creepy supernatural things continue to emerge there which are dealt with by the town’s former sheriff, Stan Miller (John C. McGinley) and it’s current one, Evie Barrett (Janet Varney).
Now Stan Miller is a delight as an aging, cynical, slovenly antihero who just wants to be left alone, but can’t even manage to 
do that! Teamed reluctantly with the young and beautiful woman who is his successor, Stan is pressed into service to battle legions of demonic monsters that include witches, vampires, evil puppets, and even a were-pony! Although he’d much rather be drinking and watching television, Stan uses traditional and improvised weaponry to devastating effect, repeatedly bludgeoning for example a large winged skeleton-bird wraith creature (at right) with a shovel until it moves no more .- – You gotta love this guy!
The show parodies horror in a loving fashion, and manages nods to The X-Files and other traditions from which it has drawn. I’m glad to see something like this still in active production…long may its demonic beasties thrive!
Categories: animals, anomalies, anthropomorphic, bizarre, creature features, furry, furry horror, horror, noteworthy, television, twisted reality
Tags: comedy horror, Stan Against Evil
Comments: 3 Comments
November 22, 2018
Being a big fan of Halloween, I love images of early Thanksgiving parades because they had balloons and floats back then that were, well, creepy! Animals have had a long association with Thanksgiving Day parades since their inception, with the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day parade beginning in 1924 and including live animals, many of them actually borrowed from the Central Park Zoo for the occasion.
The early Thanksgiving Day parades often had a circus orientation, and hence the animal elements. Actual lions, tigers, and bears were trucked down city streets, traumatizing them and causing the elicitation of roars and growls that frightened observing children. Wisely, the use of living animals was abandoned after a few years, with animal balloons and floats substituted, together with some great vintage cartoonish stuff that was rather surreal. Felix the Cat was an early parade favorite.
In the 1930’s, Macy’s actually released their balloons at the end of the parade for a few years, with rewards of $25 offered for their return, a princely sum in depression-era America. Macy’s wasn’t the only Thanksgiving Day parade on the block, either, with Newark, New Jersey having memorable ones as well as other cities in diverse locations.
So while you enjoy that traditional Thanksgiving feast, remember those poor souls who marched, danced, and performed in frigid twenty-some degree weather this year in parts of America dressed among other things as fried eggs and sticks of butter. As I said, I like my holidays surreal, which makes them and family easier to take…
Categories: animal presence, animals, anthropomorphic, furry, twisted reality
Tags: Thanksgiving Parade Animals
Comments: 4 Comments
FOXSYLVANIA 
You must be logged in to post a comment.