Archive for the ‘furry heroes’ category

Hail, Caesar!

July 24, 2011

 – – Caesar’s back, and he’s dark and seriously miffed…Caesar of the Planet of the Apes franchise, that is!  It’s been a long time since the original 1968 Charlton Heston Apes movie introduced us to what was then revolutionary special effects make-up  and the delights of Roddy McDowall as chimpanzee archaeologist Cornelius; he would later play Cornelius’ son, Caesar, in Conquest of the Planet of the Apes, and later in Battle for the Planet of the Apes.  McDowall characteristically spent close to four hours in the make-up chair for each chimpanzee transformation.  Despite wearing heavy ape prosthetic appliances, McDowall was able to effectively emote his character’s personality by exaggerating his facial expressions.

In the new Rise of the Planet of the Apes movie headed your way in August, a scientist is experimenting on a chimpanzee named Caesar to develop a cure for Alzheimer’s Disease.  Caesar’s intelligence is greatly enhanced by the experiments, and well…you know the rest.  The CGI apes have amazingly intelligent-looking eyes, but it remains to be seen whether this new Apes movie will be more fun than a barrel of monkeys or will simply drive you bananas…

One of Us?

April 4, 2011

– – Imagine a surreal TV series about a guy, the girl next door, and her mixed breed dog, Wilfred. The twist is that the dog is played by a comic in a rather mediocre fursuit, complete with a drawn-on black nose!  That’s right, there may be a furry cult classic in the making here!

Wilfred will be aired on FX, and is based on a successful award-winning Australian series.  Not all foreign shows translate well to American television, although there have been notable exceptions such as Being Human. The premise of this show is exciting as we who are furry generally have to content ourselves on television with anthropomorphic animal ‘toon characters such as Brian in Family Guy, or occasionally catch glimpses of fursuited actors such as Bill Murray’s dog character Frisbee all too briefly portrayed in the movie, Scrooged. Such tantalizing tastes only leave us hungry for more, and here in Wilfred we have the promise of a major, on-going furry character!

Family Guy alum David Zuckerman is adapting the quirky comedy for FX, and will write and exec produce.  Jason Gann, who co-created and starred in the Australian series, plays the title character.- -Coming your way in  June!

Outfoxed!

February 28, 2011

– – Sadly, fox hunting is popular in the farming region of Belarus that borders Poland.  It came to pass there in January that a hunter shot a poor fox from a distance, and then approached planning to bludgeon the fox to death with the butt of his rifle…swell “sport,” huh?

The fox, however, fiercely resisted these plans, scuffling although wounded with the mighty hunter and managing to pull the trigger on the hunter’s gun with his paw, shooting the 40-year-old man in the leg!   The fox then made good his escape, and the hunter wound up in the hospital.

Now that’s wily, and what I call poetic justice!




Die Hard Steer!

December 12, 2010

– – Every now and then, I like to salute  valiant bovines who refuse to go quietly when sent to the slaughterhouses.  One such hero with hooves, Super Red by name, escaped from a farm in Stroud Township in northeastern Pennsylvania as he was about to go to slaughter.

The owner of the steer then contacted police, who caught up with Super Red and shot him with a rifle.  The round hit the animal in the head, but he survived and ran off! I’m pleased to say that Super Red remains on the loose!- –Run, Red, run!

If Super Red were here, I’m sure he’d tell us that it was only a flesh wound…and that it’s important to keep fighting and never give up…

The blood of the aurochs runs in this one…and in my fantasies, terrible indeed will be the revenge of Super Red!


The Death of Bozo…

November 26, 2010

– – The bear, that is, not the clown!  Bozo the black bear had spent more than 15 years receiving treats near the grounds of a Northeastern Pennsylvania mountain resort, and was by all accounts a tame, gentle animal.  Unfortunately these very qualities probably led to his demise at the hands of a crossbow hunter on Nov. 15th, the first day of archery season.

One area resident fed Bozo for 17 years from the time that he was a cub, noting that the gentle giant was especially fond of donuts and anything sweet.  Bozo was considered a “mascot” at an area eatery, accepting ice cream there the night before he was slain.  He would sometimes let people pet him.  Local residents who had come to know and love Bozo are grief-stricken.  “I mean I feel like I lost a friend,” said one.

Ironically the hunter did nothing illegal, whereas those who fed him did. In Pennsylvania it’s illegal to feed some wildlife, including bears.–Why?–When a wild animal looses its fear of humans, it’s vulnerable.  Bears can create a public nuisance if they’re fed by humans, and they’re creatures of habit that can become accustomed to finding food in one area.

The legal slaying of a beloved and tame animal may create, however, a public relations disaster for the practice of hunting, which has already come under fire.  Hunting is further damaged by the attitudes of some of its practitioners.  One hunter said regarding Bozo’s death, “As long as the bear was not on someone’s property, it doesn’t matter if a few people liked it.”

Attitudes of that type and this image say more about hunting than any animal rights activist ever could.- -RIP, Bozo…



Furry Superhero Spotted!

November 22, 2010

– – Our last best hope against Bad Kitty,  Powercat was recently spotted soaring high over my area, and I consider myself fortunate to have captured one of the few known images of this mysterious and powerful but elusive hero…

…at some point in the future, Powercat and the evil mastermind, Tiger (aka Bad Kitty posted about previously) will probably tangle in a battle royal expected to lay waste to much of civilization as we know it…imagine the encounter!

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

Powercat:  (flying in) “I’ve come fur ‘ya, Bad Kitty!”

Tiger:  “Powercat!–DAMN!”

Powercat:  “Nothing beats my kung fu, Bad Kitty!”

Tiger:  “Not even my radioactive hairballs?  (hacks one up)—AHAHAHAHAHA!”

Powercat:  “Gasp!–Weakening…Uhhh!”  (collapses)

Tiger:  “Join me, Powercat!–Don’t make me destroy you!”

Powercat:  “Never!”

Tiger:  “Powercat…I… AM… YOUR FATHER!”

Powercat:  (screams)  “NOOOOOOOO!”

(fade to black with Powercat prone on the ground and Bad Kitty laughing demonically…)

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

…Well, isn’t this a stinky litter box?…Is a real cat-aclysm to follow?!-Join us next time on Foxsylvania!!!

Bad Kitty!

November 20, 2010

– -I, for one, would not care to run afoul of this cat…he looks like an evil feline mastermind, or something that a Harry Potter villain might morph into!

…appearing like something out of a Stephen King novel, the cat, appropriately named Tiger, has reportedly inflicted “nasty injuries” upon postal delivery personnel in a small town called Farsley in Northern England.   Royal Mail has announced that they will no longer deliver mail to the home of Tiger’s owner…they apparently are not adept at dealing with cases of feline demonic possession.

By the way, the cat is 19-years-old, which is 92 in human years…but I still don’t recommend disrespecting him!   Do so at your own peril…total global domination is this feline’s goal!

(…Upcoming:  our last best hope!)

Furry in the Field: the Mascot Experience

October 20, 2010

– – What’s a great job for a furry?–Why, mascotting, of course!  Not that every mascot is a furry…some mascots represent humans like warriors, archetypes,  or historical figures, and some are unidentifiable weird creatures that don’t exist in reality.  Additionally, not all those playing mascots are of the furry fandom, although working as a mascot or having contact with one may lead to further identification and empathy with animals.    Many mascots of high school, college, and professional teams are identifiable animals, and that’s where the fun as well as the challenge begins!

Now if you want to be a mascot, don’t think that there are oodles of opportunities; it’s probably easier to land a job on a professional sports team that to be a professional mascot!  There are only about 125 professional mascot positions available in the United States, so opportunities are few, with many interested applicants for the few available positions.   This doesn’t rule out college or high school mascotting practice, or for that matter, dressing as a cow to promote the local dairy!

A mascot is a furson of many talents, a kind of actor/actress and performance artist who really must learn to work it!   You’ve got to be able to kind of get into the skin that you’re wearing, both physically in terms of the performance demands and psychologically;  you have to learn the politics of working with individual coaches and advisers, and understand what behaviors are acceptable and expected and where and when to manifest them.    There are schools where the finer points of marketing a mascot are taught, and where aspiring mascots are helped with everything from costume design to performance tips.

There are horror stories, too…of mascots being abused by drunks or opposing fans, and of user-unfriendly costumes worn in earlier times.  Dry-clean only costumes if neglected could become infested with fleas, and when chemicals were put on to kill the fleas, fur could fall off!   Today’s costumes are lighter and even machine-washable, weighing in at around ten pounds.  Compensation is better, and fans appreciate, support, and when necessary defend their team’s mascots.

Even after you take it off, the costume stays with you, kinda like the “furry inside” experience many of us in the furry fandom can relate to.  Mascotting is really both a sport and a performance art, and it deserves more recognition and rewards…

Magnificent Obsession

August 28, 2010

– -Uh–oh!–The previous post has gotten me going again on Catwoman, and I’m afraid you’ll just have to ride it out with me…

Catwoman really has the complete package; she’s furry, female, and feline with just the right touch of sado-masochism going on.   As the folks at Toyota might say, who could ask for anything more?

In the cult of Catwoman, I might be considered a zealot; I’d go door-to-door for her! In fact, I think a National Catwoman Day might be a good idea as kind of a fusion of Halloween, religion, and furry awareness. Besides, who couldn’t use another day off, especially for such a worthy cause?

Catwoman also has an approach-avoidance thing going on; she’s dark, and we wouldn’t have her any other way!   You know that Catwoman would take you to heaven before she sends you to hell…

…and I know it’s all a fantasy.  Catwoman belongs to Batman, after all. –But a fox can dream, can’t he?  😉

Stuffed Celebrity Animals

July 12, 2010

– – In times long past, kids actually had cowboys as heroes!  They had no superpowers,  but could shoot a gun out of a bad guy’s hand, or win in a fistfight without getting their hats knocked off.  People when they got shot didn’t even bleed or lose body parts!

“How lame!,” declares one present-day kid.

“Totally gay!,” agrees another.

–No, it’s true!  I swear! – -There were cowboy heroes like the Lone Ranger, Sky King. and Roy Rogers!   Said cowboy heroes had their animal sidekicks, especially their horses and occasionally a dog.- -Well, when Roy Rogers’ famous horse Trigger died, he had the deceased equine preserved, as in stuffed.  Once featured at the Roy Rogers and Dale Evans Museum in Branson, Mo., Trigger is now going on the auction block at Christie’s in Manhattan, and is expected to fetch between $100,000 and $200,000!  Also being sold are the preserved remains of Roy Rogers’ dog, Bullet.

– –Happy Trails to You, famous old furries!