Archive for the ‘Brilliant but twisted’ category

« FOXSYLVANIA home page
« Older Entries
Newer Entries »

Allstate’s “Wild Bird” Commercial…

March 19, 2024

Allstate’s Dean Winters as the redoubtable “Mayhem” is doing animal impersonations again, this time as a wild bird stuck in the attic of basketball legend Larry Bird. – -What, you’ve never seen a bird in a suit before?! That absurdity is part of the humor. Well, once again Winters pulls his animal act off, bonking his head against an attic window to show his entrapment, knocking stuff about, and announcing that he’s “going cuckoo…”

All of the ruckus draws the now senior Bird out of his comfy chair into his attic, where he encounters the bird-Winters, and arms himself with a lacrosse stick! “What ‘ya got, Larry? May the best bird win,” declares Winters. It’s no contest, however, as Winters-as-bird handily dodges basketball Bird’s swings. Jumping to reach Winters, Larry Bird crashes through the attic floor, his legs dangling comically through his living room ceiling…

“You may be a legend on the court, but you’re an amateur up here,” mocks wild bird Winters from the rafters. “Now YOU’RE the bird stuck in the attic!”

Once more, nature prevails…as does Dean Winters, whether as a cat, raccoon, deer, St. Bernard puppy, or bird.- – Can he do a fox next?! 🦊

Categories: absurdities, advertising, animal presence, animal problems, anthropomorphic, Brilliant but twisted, furry, furry commercials, humor, television
Tags: , ,

Comments: 1 Comment

The Robotic Ghost Furries of “Five Nights At Freddy’s”

March 16, 2024

There is now a 2023 movie based on the popular video game, Five Nights At Freddy’s. For those who have been living in a cave, Freddy’s envisions a closed and decaying 1980’s kiddie pizza emporium much like Chuck E. Cheese’s where the animal-resembling members of the house robotic entertainment band continue unnaturally to lumber around, stalking and killing intruders on the premises…

Now I’ve seen one of these animal robot bands performing in Florida, and it was creepy, because budget-level animatronics do not approach Disney World standards, and the robotic animal performers don’t move fluidly. Because of this, cartoon-like animal robots make suitable fodder for horror movies, kind of like Jason or Freddy with creaky hydraulics…

I’m usually not a fan of video games turned into movies, but this one is not without its moments, probably because I am a damn furry, and likely wouldn’t mind spending my afterlife as Foxy, the robot pirate-fox. Just be kind to him, because he’s been knocking around since the 1980’s unattended and without proper maintenance. Foxy is the worse for the wear, much like I myself…

The robots, ‘ya see, are inhabited by the spirits of deceased children who mysteriously vanished. While they are murderous, their mayhem is not graphically rendered on screen, and one reviewer termed this an introduction to horror movies for the video game generation, “baby’s first horror movie.” There are some novel concepts here, even if the film itself is not especially scary. This probably would have been better suited for presentation on the SyFy channel instead of the big screen, but it did play well in theaters. Similar themes were developed in The Banana Splits Movie, which didn’t have a video game pedigree. But catch this one on Amazon Prime if you have it. It’s fun, but won’t haunt your dreams. It just can’t be taken seriously, but there’s nothing wrong with that, and robotic furries are a kick…

(Foxy’s looked better, but haven’t we all?! And I could definitely get into the Robo-pirate fox scene, yarr! Lower yer flag and stand by to be boarded by the scourge of the Seven Seas, Matey!) 🦊

See y’all at Freddy Fazbear’s…or maybe the funny papers!

*Laughs hysterically and is taken away by nice young men in clean white coats* 🤪

Categories: absurdities, alternative realities, anthropomorphic, biomechanical, Brilliant but twisted, fantasy, furries, furry, furry films, furry movies, horror, humor, Questionably creepy, twisted reality
Tags: ,

Comments: 6 Comments

Arm and Hammer “Crazy Hard” Hardball Litter

March 9, 2024

Those Arm and Hammer cats are back, from the same people who brought you a feline John Travolta at the disco a while back! Disclaimer: If seeing cats in bed makes you feel uncomfortable, stay out of their bedroom! But I’m a furry, this is my world, and so just cope with it, OK? No one forces you to be here, after all… 😸

These cats in their bedroom and alternative universe just love to watch videos of the crazy and stupid things that humans do, the same way that folks in our benighted reality love to watch cat videos…and humans do some stupid things, like throw balls of used cat litter around, to see how hard it is. And how hard are they? Crazy hard!

This is lightweight HardBall Litter, after all, and you can even hit clumps of it with a tennis racket against walls. Or throw it downstairs. – -Tsk, the things that these stoopid hyoomans do! Always makes you laugh, though…

And isn‘t this a handsome couple, just enjoying themselves? So what if they’re sharing a bed? We’ve come a long way as a society since Lucy and Ricky Ricardo had separate twin beds in their bedroom! And how do you suppose that kittens are made? Cats got needs, ‘ya know…but we’re not gonna get into that here, this being a semi-respectable blog, and all. Meow… 🐈🐈‍⬛

Categories: advertising, alternative realities, anthropomorphic, Brilliant but twisted, commercials, furry, furry commercials, television
Tags: ,

Comments: 3 Comments

“Disenchantment;” the Middle Ages as Buddy Comedy

January 30, 2024

As Monty Python and the Holy Grail memorably showed us, the Middle Ages were not totally dead and dreary times, especially if approached with a sense of wry humor. Simpsons creator Matt Groening does exactly that in Disenchantment on Netflix, and the series works on many levels, especially if you like history, myth, and satire…

While too complex to adequately cover in a single blog post, the series concerns the life and exploits of a medieval princess, Tiabeanie (Bean for short), a teenaged hellion adept at gambling and barroom-style fighting who has modern sensitivities, and rebels against medieval conventions such as arranged royal marriages…

Seeking to chart her own way through life, Bean is accompanied by mythic medieval companions that mirror the duality of her own nature; an innocent, idealistic elf appropriately named Elfo, and a black demon straight from Hell called Luci (short for Lucifer)…

Luci is my standout favorite in the series, a 9,000-year-old demon as inky-black as the original Felix the Cat, and thought by most who encounter him to be a weird, talking cat. Yes, Luci is the furry character in the series, having horns, fangs, and a forked tail, who despite his denials often postures bodily and presents like a cat. Sent from Hell to guide the Princess towards chaos, indulgence, and destruction, Luci proclaims himself to be “the guy who makes you feel good about doing bad.” This is one cool, laid-back, savvy demon!

This cat-like demon evolves, however, taking a serious liking to Princess Bean, becoming a loyal companion, fighting against her foes, and eventually dying for her…a sacrifice so noble that Luci appears before God in heaven, earning the status of ascended demon, a kind of reverse Lucifer, if you will…a bad guy who becomes good!

So catch Disenchantment on Netflix, if only to visit this fantastic, drinking, smoking, drug-ingesting cat-like thing that I’d be pleased to have in my corner, anytime! Bad boys, of course, can make you feel so good! 🦊

Categories: alternative realities, Brilliant but twisted, cartoons, fantasy, furry, humor, Mythological, television, twisted reality
Tags: ,

Comments: 3 Comments

Dean Winters in “Deer Mayhem…”

January 4, 2024

Dean Winters in his Allstate commercials effectively does a remarkable range of impersonations of objects, types of people, and to my interest, animals. In recent memory he has portrayed a raccoon, large breed puppy, bear, and my personal fave, a cat! Remarkably, he channels all of these creatures with little or no makeup, and often while wearing a suit. He doesn’t require a costume or prosthetics, rendering his minimalist but spot-on impressions by posture, actions, and attitude…

…and so equally masterful is Winters’ impression of a wild deer, emerging from a wooded area chewing on a leaf. He comes to a road, musing “What is this thing?” as he freezes on that surface, because that’s what deer do. Transfixed by the headlights of an approaching car, Winters as deer is thrown up onto the vehicle before landing on the pavement before it, leaving vehicular damage in his wake…

Winters is not a dead deer, however, continuing to address us scuffed up while lying on the road surface. Heck, Mayhem is nigh about indestructible. And if you had Allstate insurance, you might save some bucks, and be saved from Mayhem…like him! 🙀

Categories: advertising, animal spokepersons, anthropomorphic, Brilliant but twisted, furry, furry commercials, television
Tags:

Comments: 2 Comments

Sympathy for The Grinch…

December 16, 2023

Please allow me to introduce myself, I’m the Grinch…of Mt. Crumpit!” – -(to the tune of, “Sympathy for the Devil,” by The Rolling Stones)

At this time of year, my thoughts turn naturally to The Grinch. He was, after all, a furry, and like many of us, misunderstood and much-maligned. Max was a furry too, an anthropomorphic dog, loyal and obedient to his master, even if the Ego to the Grinch’s Id. Max I suspect actually liked Xmas, and probably would have affectionately licked any Whos that he came across…

Now, can you imagine being visibly different as a child, then banished to lonely exile on the foreboding heights of Mt. Crumpit? As Kermit the Frog memorably lamented, “It’s not easy being green!”

Is there not, I say, a little bit of the pre-redemptive Grinch in all of us? Who of us has not had dark thoughts after being exposed to Xmas carols and commercials since Halloween? I mean, how many times can you suffer hearing “I Want A Hippopotamus for Xmas” before you utterly lose it?! 🙀

And let’s face it, The Whos were annoying in their relentless cheerfulness. They represented the overkill aspects of Xmas, and holding us all up to an impossible celebratory standard. Clearly, they needed taken down a few pegs, an infusion of Grinchiness…

Even pre-redemptively, The Grinch had some remarkable qualities. He was a survivor, a strong if solitary spirit who was a master strategist and a genius inventor with many skills, kind of the Wile E. Coyote of Xmas characters. His Road Runner was the Xmas overkill that is everywhere at this time of year. I submit to you that The Grinch was a cultural warrior, a tragic hero who only wanted peace and sanity, and perhaps a little Who Hash…

So respect and honor The Grinch, who meant well but whose reach exceeded his grasp. I shall celebrate The Mean One in my heart always, and save him a generous slice of roast beast…🦊

Categories: absurdities, anthropomorphic, Brilliant but twisted, famous furries, fantasy, furry, movies, seasonal, television
Tags: ,

Comments: 3 Comments

NJM’s “Snowman” Commercial…

December 6, 2023

What could be more Christmas-y than a cute, smiling snowman? The one in this NJM insurance commercial is even rather pint-sized, so he’s not particularly menacing. Two kids are crafting the snowman, one of which looks a bit like Ralphie in A Christmas Story. And wouldn’t ‘ya know it, once they put Dad’s ball cap on said snowman, he’s comes to life in the best Frosty the Snowman tradition…

Rather than lead the kids in a parade, this snowman begins to sing about Polar insurance, “the coolest around,” He waves his stick-branch arms cheerfully about. The kids scream, and run away; Mom and Dad are still standing there, however, and the insurance-shilling snowman asks them if they have any hot chocolate. One wonders if the snowman has a death wish…

For a company that prides itself in having no mascots, NJM has produced for us some of the best mascots around…a variety, no less!

Categories: absurdities, advertising, alternative realities, Brilliant but twisted, commercials, humor, television, twisted reality
Tags:

Comments: 2 Comments

Ditching the Drama Llama “Flight” Commercial…

November 14, 2023

Drama Queens (and Kings, let’s be honest) are just about everywhere on the internet. You can barely enter a forum without encountering at least one, and they are easy to “trigger.” So it is appropriate that Dramamine has unveiled a spokes-animal that is an actual drama-llama, trying to get Rachel nervous about an upcoming flight…

…walking with her, the drama llama reminds the air traveler that she got nauseous during a previous flight, that the flight may get bumpy, and that she has a middle seat. But when Rachel whips out her box of Dramamine, the llama audibly gasps, stands back as the jet door closes, and tells the passenger that he or she is gonna wait right there!

Although the llama’s voice sounds male, if female would the drama llama be a momma? And at night time, would she be a drama llama in pajamas? Inquiring minds wanna know…

So if you see a drama llama, don’t feed it unless with Dramamine…and don’t confuse a drama lama with an emo alpaca, either… 🦊

Categories: absurdities, advertising, alternative realities, anthropomorphic, Brilliant but twisted, commercials, furry, furry commercials, television
Tags: ,

Comments: 11 Comments

Mountain Dew…”Your Soul Needs Dew” Commercial

November 6, 2023

This commercial for Mountain Dew blew me away…totally! It’s definitely furry-friendly. Three persons figure in it. A guy is working on his computer in a large office. He stares at his complexion on his monitor, and he is reptilian. A young woman in a diner happens to stare out the window, and sees her reflection as an exotic bird. A third guy is throwing out garbage in an alley, looks up, and sees his image as feline. This furry trio has gotta do the town, and they do!

We see these guys individually and collectively, the reptile viewing his reflection in an elevator glass and the big cat viewing his paw appendages. They go places, too, like a pool hall, making a fine entrance and getting admiring glances. The reptilian is shown performing in some kind of trendy club, playing to a receptive audience. Two of them are shown in an off-road vehicle. There’s no stopping these guys as they make the world their own in their idealized furry forms…

So enjoy…I think that someone out there in commercial-land finally understands the furry experience, and the inner self! And I’d drink a boatload of Mountain Dew if it would transform me… 🦊

Categories: absurdities, advertising, alternative realities, anthropomorphic, Brilliant but twisted, furries, furry, furry commercials, furry fandom, furry television, television, twisted reality
Tags: ,

Comments: 6 Comments

RIP, Paul Reubens…

August 2, 2023

I was shocked and deeply saddened by the recent death of actor and comedian Paul Reubens, not knowing that he was battling cancer. Best known for his Pee-Wee Herman character in his red bow tie, white shoes, and several sizes too small gray suit, Pee-Wee’s Playhouse ruled 1980’s Saturday morning kid’s television, presenting us with a twisted world that appealed to children and secretly adults alike…

I grew up watching wild and crazy children’s TV hosts like Soupy Sales and Sandy Becker, and Pee-Wee Herman was just the logical extension of the demented kiddie show host, a perpetual 10-year-old boy trapped awkwardly in a man’s body. I’m a man-child too, ‘ya see, the 10-year-old in me still secretly loving Godzilla movies…

Paul Reubens recognized the enduring power of childhood. A few other comedians have too, as did the late great Andy Kaufman when he memorably lip-synched the theme to Mighty Mouse, complete to a vintage recording with earnest expressions and dramatic gestures…

Pee-Wee Herman in his Playhouse created an entire twisted world for us, a microcosm of madness complete with a cowboy, a sea captain, dinosaurs, anthropomorphic furniture and devices, a robot, and even a genie in a box! It was a world of enchantment far preferable to reality, and we felt that we belonged there! Paul Reuben’s “Playhouse” world was a fully fleshed out alternative reality drawn from bits and pieces of our childhoods, the better parts, really…

Pee-Wee Herman expressed the inner child in all of us, and represented the way that we wished we could respond to inflexible humorless adults if we were not ourselves expected to be respectable grown-ups. Pee-Wee was Peter Pan with a sarcastic sense of humor…

Paul Reubens was more than just Pee-Wee Herman, too. He had movie and TV roles in which he was virtually unrecognizable, such as The Spleen in the under-rated film Mystery Men, was a vampire in the Buffy series, and played the father of Batman villain The Penguin…

But it is as Pee-Wee Herman that Paul Reubens will best be remembered, and while not everyone’s cup of tea, it’s certain that he’s left many of us smiling….and just remember that if you hear the Secret Word, scream real loud! Adults hate it when you do that…

Categories: absurdities, alternative realities, Brilliant but twisted, humor, movies, television
Tags: , ,

Comments: 9 Comments

« Older Entries
Newer Entries »