Archive for the ‘furry’ category

The Pepto Bismol Squirrel in “Aerial Enlightenment”

November 15, 2013

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– – Enlightenment can apparently be found anywhere, even on aircraft, when you have Pepto To Go!  We’ve already seen the zen-oriented rodent in the forest, and now he pops up on a flight, where he tells a female passenger that he can see that she’s packed…her stomach!  Such a pronouncement would be unwelcome from a human, but coming from a squirrel, we marvel at his sage perception.  

He appears out of a seatback compartment that looks like a medicine cabinet, and before we know it, the squirrel has somehow teleported into the woman’s pocket, emerging with a vial of Pepto, and telling the passenger that relief can be hers. There is a price to be paid, however, for the woman’s airline peanuts belong to the squirrel, and are shown in his tiny paws as he reappears in the seatback compartment in front of her, and the commercial ends.  Wisdom, like the squirrel, is where you find it…and perhaps the squirrel will come when the student is ready…

The Denskies and the Bear…

November 13, 2013

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– – In a new Sears commercial dealing with points redemption, we again see Bob Denskie, the guy earlier at the core of the squirrel revolt, trying to save money and winding up apparently in mortal danger.  Venturing out in the woods to harvest a Christmas tree, we see a panicking Denskie dragging the object of his search, running while being pursued by a bear.  “I’ve got the tree, open the door!,” he implores urgently with the bear in hot pursuit.  Denskie makes an additional observation about the bear: “He’s not hibernating!

We then cut to information about how Sears bonus purchase points add up, making it an easier way to save money.  When we are again returned to the hapless Denskie, we find that we need not have been concerned, for he is shown making snow angels with the bear sitting harmlessly at his side.  “And I thought you were gonna eat me!,” comments Bob Denskie, alive, well, and presumably much relieved…

Five-Hour Sour Apple Energy Shots Deer…

November 10, 2013

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– – In a recent commercial, the door of a rustic cabin deep in the woods creaks open late one night.  Standing in the doorway, we see the form of a magnificent buck.  The invader steals into the cabin where a hunter sleeps in bed; quickly and silently, the deer steals the hunter’s five-hour energy shots, thinking by this action that the hunter will be weakened, drowsy and unable to undertake the hunt the next morning! But perhaps the hunter has only pretended to be asleep; he pulls down his covers to reveal beneath them a pack of five-hour extra strength sour apple energy shots, saying to the now absent deer that he’ll be seeing him bright and early the next morning…diabolically clever!

One can hardly fault the deer for seeking to deprive the hunter of his edge.  Perhaps, however, the deer should have absconded with the hunter’s rifle instead of his energy shots, and opened up on him with his own weapon when he sought to pursue his “sport,” making it for the first time a fair competition…that’s what the fox says!

 

Tiger in the Library?

November 6, 2013

white tiger– – A recent Subway commercial for their Sriracha Chicken Melt sub features a woman named Candice, apparently the librarian, whom we are shown comfortably seated at the main desk in a busy library.  With her sprawled on an adjoining table is a magnificent white tiger, who is spied by a startled male assistant, Carl, apparently returning books to the shelf using a cart.  “I’m not sure that you should have that here!,” ventures Carl nervously, referring to the tiger.  Candice responds as if he was referencing her sandwich, however, saying that she’s just gotten into trying new and spicy things.  She then chides Carl for having an overdue scrapbooking book out, and sends the chastised guy on his sorry way.  Carl is clearly not an alpha male type…

In the remaining seconds of the short commercial spot, the featured sub is described as “bold” and “fiery,” and that is presumably the association or linkage with the tiger.  I guess that we all have to be wild in our own ways…

Bear in your Buick?

October 28, 2013

05_Flatbed_WEB - JULY– – As do a number of animals, bears continue to acquire skill sets, to learn, and to adapt to human-engineered objects and environments.  For this reason, bears have acquired a degree of know-how and finesse, and are able to do things with greater skill and agility than once was the case.  There once was a time when a a bear would have smashed a jar of peanut butter to get at its contents; now, bears having exposure to the item and a degree of experience with it can actually unscrew the lid!  Bears in some locations have also acquired the ability to get into cars by manipulating door latches.  In the past two weeks, three bears have been trapped in cars in Truckee, California.  The trouble is that once inside a car, the door may close in on the bear, rendering it trapped within the vehicle.  The bear after acquiring the desired food items that prompted its entry into the vehicle then endeavors to get out, with results that aren’t pretty for vehicle interiors, as bears claws are deadly weapons more than capable of trashing a car from within.

When observing a car rocking and bouncing about due to powerful and destructive interior forces, the owner of said vehicle would understandably want to extricate the ursine occupant promptly.  In some cases, police have been summoned to remove unwanted ursines from cars; at times, it’s necessary to smash the car windows to do so.  In other cases, people have allowed bears to escape simply by opening car doors, and remaining out of the way.

As prevention is obviously desirable, the best way to keep bears out of cars is not to keep fragrant foods within them.  Locking the doors is another common-sense precaution…

What Does The Fox Say?

October 2, 2013

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– – There are few things that I both love and hate at the same time, and a video by two Norwegian brothers of the comedy group Ylvis named What Does The Fox Say is one of them.  The video begins with a gathering of fursuited people at a home, and many different species are represented; there is a rather good dalmatian, an elephant, and some birds, among others.  Although these scenes are thought to be a reference to the furry fandom, the brothers denied even knowing about furries when this footage was made.  You then have a few awful moments when you think that you are viewing a video intended for a preschool audience; animals are introduced by the sounds that they make, e.g., “A cat goes meow,” etc.  After several such painful introductions, however, the question is raised, “What does a fox say?,” and we are off to the races, or rather, the forest…

…the forest is wonderful, a tree-bordered area shrouded in the night and rich ground fog; I could party there all night!  We are shown the brothers, wearing mediocre fursuits with facial fox paint. Then there are the dancers ringing the brothers, fox-like but not attired as such, more like the Blues Brothers with white shirts and dark ties…they do, however, have some awesome moves!  I didn’t know a pelvis could move like that. .. anyhow, as the brothers launch into their vocals, we hear as part of the lyrics sounds supposedly representative of those that foxes make, with the camera occasionally cutting to a grandfatherly-type reading a storybook to a child and making those same sounds.  It then becomes a matter of interpretation as to whether you think that the sounds made are intended as a parody of the excesses of electronic house music, or are actually intended as imitative of the variety of sounds that foxes make.  We do make over forty sounds for different purposes, including warning alerts and, ahem, calls to lure a mate…(blushes)

The later stage of the video that I love becomes mystical and spacey, with the vocals continuing to refer to the language of foxes as an ancient mystery.  The performing fox-clad brothers are surrounded by spikes of blue laser light, and arise into the air to be suspended there comfortably.   Is there an alien connection? – – I’ll never tell!  The final stage of the video shows a breath-taking CGI fox who enters at the periphery of the scene then takes center stage, arising to stand on his hind legs and singing scat in a beautiful baritone/bass voice, with subtle supportive choreography!   This jazz-oriented fox is alone worth viewing the video for, and could easily become a break-out star.- – I’d buy his albums, this dude has some major pipes!

You’ll either love it or hate it, but whether for the comedic elements, the furry overtones, or the electronic music, What Does The Fox Say is worth a look and a listen, and can accessed on YouTube.  Just don’t ask me about the ancient mystery thing, please.  These are secrets entrusted to only a few, and I’m bound not to tell…wink, wink!   http://youtu.be/jofNR_WkoCE

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Cousin Itt…

September 27, 2013

Itt– – I would be remiss if I did not include at least one post about Cousin Itt, since who could be more hairy or furry than he? A recurrent but not main character on The Addams Family television series and movies, Itt was a character not created by cartoonist Charles Addams but rather by the producer of the series. The cousin of Gomez Addams, Itt was a short individual completely covered with long, thick hair that completely obscured any underlying features. He typically wore sunglasses and a hat, usually a derby. Itt’s speech was rapid, high-pitched gibberish understandable to any member of the Addams family but not to anyone else.

Cousin Itt did not routinely reside at the Addams mansion, but was a regular visitor there and at times occupied a room, one scaled down to his height and size. Itt was reputed to be highly intelligent, and had a variety of skills and talents, including singing. Itt was quite a lady’s man, and did at one time sire a child, whose name appropriately was “What,” supposedly the first word out of the gynecologist’s mouth when the child, who resembled a tiny Itt, was delivered.

Itt could be the life of any party. My favorite episode depicted Gomez asking Cousin Itt what was under his great mop of hair.  Itt’s response was, “roots!”

The Kia Hamsters in, “Totally Transformed!”

September 16, 2013

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 – – The Kia hamsters combined cool, cute, and cuddly in their previous commercials, but they were always a bit, well, rotund. So with a redesign of the endorsed product, it was time to pack the rascally rodents off to the gym and the salon for some serious body sculpting and a fashion makeover.  We are shown the boys working out in a variety of ways, including treadmills, exercise bikes,  and swimming pools.  We see them all in a row under driers at the salon, and when they appear in formal attire and shades at a red carpet Broadway-type opening, the transformation is indeed striking; these guys are sleek, stylish, sexy, and total babe-killers!  There hasn’t been a physical transformation this dramatic since Rocky Balboa went from chump to champ.

Backed by Applause by none less than Lady Gaga, these hamsters have indeed arrived…

The Day of the Squirrel…

September 11, 2013

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Sears has given us a great gift in their commercial, Squirrel Revolt, about the best furry-themed ad that I’ve seen in months! The commercial begins with the fictitious Denskie couple entering their home, where Bob Denskie reveals to his better half that he’s trained those “pesky squirrels” to cut coupons! And so we are shown realistic CGI squirrels, about half a dozen sitting at tiny individual work tables and industriously using scissors. “I love your brain, Bob!,” says his adoring wife. “So do I!,” agrees Bob immodestly.

All is not well, however, in this workers’ paradise, for a moment later one squirrel throws his worktable over and screams:
“Enough! — Your tyranny ends now, you filthy humans!” With that, nuts are thrown, tiny fires are ignited, and the squirrel leader flings himself onto the face of his human oppressor! This is getting good! Bob screams at his wife to get the squirrel off his face, and she obliges by repeatedly whacking him in the head with a golf club! –Ooh, that’s gotta hurt! The Day of the Squirrel is at hand…and it does not bode well for the Denskies.

I, for one, wish to avoid the great and terrible wrath of the squirrel, so I don’t put them to hard labor in sweat shops, but rather feed them peanuts in parks. Perhaps they will remember this small kindness, and spare me in the coming tribulation…

“Fresh Step” DJ Cats…

September 9, 2013

dj cats— Love them or hate them, cats have been a powerful presence in advertising, and since at least the 20th century, they’ve also been associated with music, especially jazz. They’re part of the language; consider idiomatic references like hep cat, swing cat, cool cat, and the list goes on. Perhaps it’s because cats are independent and tend to choose their own focus that they’ve come to be associated with music forms that are cutting edge and a bit outside of the mainstream, at least at their inception and at one particular point in time.

It’s perhaps only natural then that cats should update and transition into studio and technology based forms of musical expression, functioning as disc jockeys and engineering today’s sound in a Fresh Step kitty litter commercial…