Archive for June 2012

Researcher Attacked by Chimpanzees…

June 30, 2012

– – A Texas graduate student researcher suffered multiple and severe bite wounds when attacked by chimpanzees at the Jane Goodall Institute Chimpanzee Eden in South Africa. 

Andrew Oberle was leading a tour at the Institute when he left the group and crossed one of two fences separating himself from the animals.  As he neared the second fence, two chimpanzees reached underneath and pulled Oberle by his feet into their enclosure where he was attacked by the animals and dragged for half a mile before armed guards and staff members were able to enter the enclosure and rescue him. 

Oberle underwent surgery, and is now in an induced coma in critical condition…

Cheetos “Bank Robbery” Commercial…

June 26, 2012

– – Chester Cheetah for “Cheetos” is one cool feline, almost unflappable.–Oh, I know, he can mess with people’s heads at times, but that’s part of his appeal, and he can put it to good use!  In a recent commercial, he’s working as a teller at a bank with a human, and they’re on their lunch break, which we all know is sacred, me time.- -Well, some robbers are stupid and inconsiderate enough to hit the bank at that time, so they more than deserve the disrespect that they receive from Chester, who repels the thugs by firing rubber bands at them!    On your way!,” Chester admonishes one robber as a rubber band stings the lout…

…some people are actually opposed to some of the newer Chester Cheetah commercials as they feel that they encourage bad behavior, but Chester has been with us since 1986, and I don’t look to see him going away anytime soon.  He is, after all, dangerously cheesy…

(Update:  This ad is only being aired on television, and is not available online.  Bank robbery victims are protesting the ad, and asking Frito-Lay to take it off the air.  A spokesperson for the company has said that they do not have any plans to stop running the spot, but that it is being looked into…)

Progressive’s “Rocket Cat”

June 23, 2012

– – He’s not to be confused with “Courageous Cat” or “Rocket Man,” but Progressive Insurance currently features a commercial in which a Progressive associate tries to “bundle” a sweet mewing cat with a rocket in a miniature pod that is reminiscent of the concept and device in the sci fi/horror classic, “The Fly.”  Fret not, however, because this associate is interrupted by the cheerfully demented Progressive icon Flo before this unnatural scheme can be carried out!

“Rocket Cat” is also reminiscent of Nyan cat, originally a YouTube video from 2011 that became an internet meme.  The video merged a Japanese pop song with an animated cartoon cat who has the body of a Pop-Tart, flies through space, and leaves a rainbow trail behind him.  Video games are now available for both “Rocket Cat” and “Nyan Cat,” if this floats your boat.  Either is preferable in my opinion as a flying feline to the dead cat helicopter we’ve blogged about here earlier. 

As for me, I’d like for Flo to place me with a fox in one of her “bundler” machines to see if I may through that means achieve the fusion that I desire.  I’ll even buy her insurance if she’d swing that for me!

The Lusca…

June 21, 2012

– – I think that the appeal of giant mollusks, cephalopods in particular, is that they are so non-mammalian as to be almost alienAdd to that the reported immensity of the lusca with an 85-foot span, and you have something rather impressive.  

An old episode of Destination Truth (2009) got into the search for a lusca off the Island of Andros in the Bahamas.  “Blue Holes” exist there as openings to a maze of underwater tunnels, with caverns starting at a depth of about 140 feet and diving depths going to around 175 feet.  Chief investigator Josh Gates found area sea captains there reluctant to charter in search of what is essentially a giant octopus, so it became necessary to venture forth in their own boat.  Armed with a FLIR thermal imager, Josh went diving in the murky water and perceived something huge in one cavern that he explored; on the surface, a disturbance was likewise perceived in the water  near the expedition boat.

While nothing further came of the investigation than this, the point was made that the deep tunnels reported to be the lairs of the lusca have never been cataloged, and that such a creature could conceivably exist there…

Ted, the Movie…

June 19, 2012

– – Imagine your favorite plush childhood companion coming to life and maturing with you into adulthood, and you have the premise for Ted, a live action/CG movie written, directed, and produced by Seth MacFarlane of Family Guy fame.  Ted the bear is voiced by MacFarlane himself, and sounds much like his Peter Griffin character would sound like if reincarnated as a teddy bear.  Ted, however, is both outrageous and foul-mouthed; this is not a movie for the kiddies!  Ted is rated “R” for language and content.

Problems arise when the 35-year-old bear owner played by Mark Wahlberg becomes serious with his girlfriend, causing the man to have to wrestle with the consequences of his childhood wish as the bear refuses to leave his side.  The trash-talking furry is coming from Universal Pictures June 29th…

“Touchdown” Snackin’ With Sasquatch Commercial…

June 15, 2012

– – In the past,  Jack Links Beef Jerky has regaled us with commercials featuring the legendary cryptid Sasquatch (aka, “Bigfoot”) in the “Messin’ With Sasquatch” series.  A common theme of these was jerky eaters  pulling sophomoric pranks on the big guy, for which the jokers would receive well-deserved and usually physical retaliation.  They’re still making these spots, as in one where the classic “snakes in a can” prank is pulled on Sasquatch; he retaliates by throwing an enormous real snake through the window of their camper in a clear case of what goes around, comes around!

Additionally, Carmichael Lynch now has a new “Snackin’ With Sasquatch” campaign out in which the former tormentors are now making nice with Sasquatch but still getting their lumps.  In the “Touchdown” spot, Sasquatch is actually sitting on a couch in the living room of two apparently twenty-something guys who are watching the big game.  When a touchdown occurs, the two guys enthusiastically jump to their feet and give a “bro” hug to one another.  Caught up in the spirit, the towering Sasquatch grabs one of the two guys and hoists him up; too bad that the ceiling isn’t high enough to accomodate this gesture!- – Feed your wild side!

The Gecko and Looney Tunes…

June 13, 2012

– – In a recent series of Geico commercials, the gecko is traveling across America, his journey leading him in this installment to the American Southwest where he runs across two iconic figures from the Looney Tunes world, none other than Wile E. Coyote  (Super Genius!) and The Road Runner.  An anvil impacts with the Earth first, embedding itself deeply, followed by a piano…then the Road Runner himself screeches to a brief halt by the gecko, but obviously soon must be off, leaving the gecko to consider the meaning of, “Meep meep!”   Wile E. Coyote follows, and we are privy to his thoughts where he envisions the gecko as dinner…

…but not to worry!  A large safe smashes down on top of the coyote, the brand on such product being, of course, “Acme”…and the gecko is again free to continue his journey, pondering “What a strange place!” as he walks off. – – It’s all vintage Chuck Jones stuff in this worthy crossover effort!

Geico’s Pet Possum…

June 11, 2012

– – We all know that some parents can be quite cheap, so when his kids asked him for a puppy, one big-spending father depicted finding that puppies can be really expensive got them a possum instead!  We see this guy in a Geico commercial working over his barbecue while his son and daughter stand over their “pet” possum, which is lying motionless at their feet; the son appears to prod the possum with his foot.  “Dad, I think he’s dead,” advises the daughter.  “Probably just playin’ possum,” reassures the father.

Sure enough, moments later the inert possum comes to life, rolls to his feet, and hisses at the two kids.  “There he is!,” declares the vindicated father, not even bothering to look up from his grill There’s an easier way to save money, of course…Geico Insurance!

Dead Cat Helicopter?

June 9, 2012

– – Me-ouch!  Call me old fashioned, but I’m not too keen on the idea of turning a deceased cat into a mini-helicopter, finding the idea unsettling and perhaps gruesome; I like bizarre and creepy, but in a good way.   PETA likewise dislikes the notion, with a spokesman calling the postmortem transformation “…a macabre way to honor a beloved family member.”  The artist, however, sees the visual exhibit as paying tribute to his cat, who now can soar with the birds that he loved.

The male cat appropriately named Orville died following a less than positive encounter with a car about six months ago.  His Dutch artist owner taxidermied the skin, encased it in polyester, and put a propeller on each of the four outstretched paws.  A remote control device enables the cat-quadcopter to fly.  The end product has been called creepy, sick, or hilarious, depending on one’s perspective.  The Orvillecopter has been on display at an art fair in Amsterdam, although Dutch animal lovers and the Dutch animal welfare party have heavily criticized the exhibit…

…the late cat, Orville, has a brother, Wilbur, who is still alive.  Both  animals were named after the Wright brothers of aviation fame.

The Great Emancipator, and More!

June 7, 2012

– – Before there was Buffy the Vampire Slayer, there was…Abraham Lincoln, Vampire Hunter!  In one of the strangest, genre-blending movies since Cowboys & Aliens, the film to be released June 22nd will mix incidentals of the American Civil War era with the gothic.  Based on the 2010 novel of the same name and co-produced by Tim Burton, it seems that the mother of the 16th president was killed by a supernatural creature, which fuels Lincoln’s passion to crush vampires and their slave-owning helpers!  Lincoln therefore assumes a secret identity as a vampire hunter, brushing elbows during the story with a variety of historical notables, including in the book Edgar Allan Poe.

– –Ha, and you thought that history was a dead subject!- -Well, in a sense, part of it is, at least where the vampires are concerned.  The book has generally received favorable reviews, and been described as being an original vampire tale with heart, humor, and (–of course!) bite.  I’m encouraged by the fact that the vampires in the film will supposedly be presented as fierce, visceral, intense, and bloodthirsty rather than as the insipid pretty boys that they’ve recently morphed into elsewhere.  Lincoln will supposedly prove himself adept at wrestling and with an ax…and John Wilkes Booth wouldn’t have dared to take on this president in a fair fight!