FOXSYLVANIA

Security cameras are everywhere now, and have captured images of everything from criminal activity to cryptic animals to supposed ghosts and aliens. One such video captured disturbing images of what appeared to be a naked girl ambulating on all fours with remarkable speed and agility. Stories and attempted explanations for the “dog girl” have spun off from there.

Now the Dog Girl (Nina Perra) was first filmed in Tamaulipas, Mexico in 2009, but reports of her appearing more recently have since surfaced. She’d now be about 25 years old. Video footage is brief, filmed at a distance, and blurry but still memorably creepy. I mean, this naked humanoid doesn’t stagger awkwardly for a short distance on all fours, but moves rapidly and fluidly. She’s done this before, and is good at it.

Internet remarks on the footage are diverse and snide, with some contending that the person depicted is on meth while others calling the images that of a wendigo. According to one report, the security cameras are in place in case the person “escapes.” A more scholarly explanation offers that the figure depicted may have a medical condition called Uner Tan syndrome, which prevents a person from walking normally in an upright position on two legs. The parent of the individual by this account protectively keeps them out of sight to avoid mockery and derision. This explanation does not account for the individual pictured being apparently naked. In addition, most people with the condition are not able to move quickly or smoothly.

So there you have it; another questionable urban myth. It’s unclear whether the video images have been subject to manipulation. All that I can say is that I’ve personally gone bipedal as that better permits me to pass unnoticed among you… 🦊

Over the years, you have probably puzzled as I have over what exactly McDonald’s mascot Grimace was supposed to be. To me, he resembled something like an ambulatory eggplant, or perhaps how Barney the Purple Dinosaur came to appear as he completely let himself go. Yet it turns out that the anthropomorphic purple blob was not actually intended to be any of these things, so wonder no longer.

Grimace first appeared in 1971 as Evil Grimace (above), complete with two sets of arms to steal milkshakes and other drinks. About a year later, however, the character was reformed to just be Grimace, a dull-witted character intended as a comic foil to Ronald McDonald. He has continued to be one of the gang ever since. This group includes Mayor McCheese and the Hamburgler.

Now thanks to Canadian franchise holder Brian Bates, we have learned that Grimace is actually nothing more than a gigantic taste bud whose presence is intended to represent that McDonald’s tastes good. The goofy grin on the character’s face is intended to reinforce his happiness with the product’s flavor. I suppose that we should be grateful that Grimace is not supposed to represent some component of the lower gastrointestinal tract.

Sometimes, the less that we know about our food, its processing, and promotion, the better…