The Flatwoods Monster!

Posted March 11, 2010 by vulpesffb
Categories: aliens, cool things, cryptozoology, scalies, television, unexplained, unidentified

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– – You can call him the Flatwoods Monster, or you can call him the Braxton County Monster, or you can call him the Phantom of Flatwoods…just don’t call him early in the morning or late for dinner, ’cause this nine or ten foot tall reptilian monster gets cranky, and just might emit some noxious fumes in your direction that could act like mustard gas, burn your respiratory tract, and ruin your whole day!

In a golden oldie incident going way back to September 12th of 1952, the Flatwoods Monster event was still cool, representing as it did a Close Encounter of the Third Kind! Back even before Elvis made it big, a large, pulsating ball of red light hovered above or rested on the ground in the town of Flatwoods in Braxton County, West Virginia.  The apparent pilot of this craft was described as being about ten feet tall but reptilian in aspect, with bulging red non-human eyes, a red face that glowed from within, and a green body clad with green, pleated skirt-like apparel that may have been a booster.   Some accounts describe the creature as having no visible arms, while others attribute short stubby arms ending in two claw-like fingers that protruded from the front of the body.  Clearly, this alien would have had a hard time finding a date on Saturday night, even in West Virginia.

When startled, the creature is reported to have emitted a series of sharp hisses and a thumping sound that emanated from within its body, ejecting for good measure a thick mist of noxious substance that irritated the eyes and noses of witnesses.   An oily residue of this substance was reportedly found on the faces of two of the witnesses after the encounter, another reportedly getting it on clothing.

Now MonsterQuest reports that other sightings of the Flatwoods Monster have occurred since ’52 and in other regions, although Flatwoods remains the epicenter.  Most recently, three such humanoid creatures were seen by a lone deer hunter who was understandably freaked out by the whole experience.  In their investigation of the sighting area, MonsterQuest investigators questioned whether a release of gases from the underground may have caused hallucinations and the reported  fireball associated with the appearance of the monster.  Their investigation found no sign of radiation or gas leaks.   Chemical investigations of a black plastic-like substance found indicated that it was a natural, organic material like wood.

In a tangent, the episode questioned whether the creature seen might have been a human-alien hybrid, and dragged out the Starchild skull, a freaky 800-some-year-old artifact that we’ve previously considered in an earlier post here.  The expert working with the Starchild skull found it to be that of a human child with modifications that were intentionally inflicted, very possibly as part of a cultural practice like cradle-boarding.

So what in the final analysis do we have?–As usual, not much of anything, but it was a fun trip, and it was good to have seen physicist Stanton Friedman again, who made a brief appearance on the episode!  It was also concluded that witnesses from the original and later sightings of the Flatwoods Monster were most likely seeing the same thing…and I’d rather meet with the grays than reptilian extraterrestrials, wouldn’t you?


Animal Lawyer!

Posted March 9, 2010 by vulpesffb
Categories: animal rights, animals, furry, furry causes, furry perspectives

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– – You have, of course, heard of Ace Ventura, Pet Detective. But did you know that Switzerland boasts an animal lawyer?

Now animal rights are no joke in tiny Switzerland, which revised and tightened its regulations two years ago.  Their animal protection laws are 160 pages long, stating among other things that pigs, budgies, goldfish, and other social animals can’t be kept alone.  Horses and cows must have regular exercise outside their stalls, and dog owners must take a training course to learn how to look after their pets.   As in other countries, the law forbids killing animals in a cruel fashion or for fun.    Swiss voters, however, recently rejected by a margin of about 70% a proposal which would have required special lawyers to be appointed to act on behalf of animals.

Switzerland’s single animal defense lawyer, Antoine F. Goetschel, represents about 150-200 animals annually, although only a handful of cases go to court each year.  Most of his clients are dogs, cows, and cats.  Cases often involve the serious abuse of animals, such as deliberate wounding, neglect, and yes, rape.  Such cases can get a bit ridiculous, as in one handled last month where the attorney represented a dead pike after an animal protection group accused the angler who caught it of cruelty for taking ten minutes to haul the fish in…

The Dino Dilemma…

Posted March 7, 2010 by vulpesffb
Categories: animals, environmental, evolution, extinct species, science, strange happenings

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– – How, oh how, did the dinosaurs die off?- – For many, the answer has been an asteroid impact, while others have blamed the eruption of a mega-volcano. Yet others think that they smoked too much… (Gary Larson, et al)

Well, the latest is that a “dream team” of 41 researchers from 12 nations continue to feel that the evidence points overwhelmingly to a mountain-sized asteroid more than seven miles wide impacting with the earth at twenty times the speed of a rifle bullet about 65 million years ago, leaving a 120-mile-wide scar, the Chicxulub crater,  on the Mexican coast. An impact-induced environmental catastrophe ensued,  with melted rock raining as far as northern Canada followed by caustic chemicals, dust, and soot filling the air, shutting down photosynthesis and causing darkness for perhaps as long as a year...major bummer!

The dinos, however, were in decline for millions of years before the asteroid strike, and the celestial hammering may be seen as presenting additional circumstances that collectively the saurians couldn’t cope with, causing 60% of all species to  go extinct at that time.

…and how about a “Dream Team” of  researchers?- – Can you imagine all of those pocket protectors?- -The nerdish laughter?- -The sexual frustration?!

Early Conditioning…

Posted March 6, 2010 by vulpesffb
Categories: anthropomorphic, furries, furry, stupid

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– – I was programmed to be furry from an early age; just my karma, I guess…anyways, when just a wee one I was enrolled in the Cub Scouts (although I would have preferred to have been called a fox kit), and attended weekly meetings in a den led by a den mother.– -Are you sensing a pattern here?!

Then I was made to swear an oath, and they’re serious stuff, by the way…swearing an oath is not to be confused with just plain swearing, which I learned early on can get you into a heap o’ trouble!  Part of the oath was, “…to obey the laws of the pack.” (silent pause for dramatic effect)

Now, many years later, I’m still bound by that oath, waiting for the pack leader to appear.- – Someone’s gotta tell me what I’m supposed to do;  I need my orders, right?   Until then and the coming revolution,  I suppose that as Churchill said,  “they also serve who only stand and wait.” I’m good at waiting as it’s not labor-intensive. – – Someday, the Alpha male will come and give me my marching orders…I have faith!

…another part of the Cub Scout oath was, “to be square”…and that, I’m afraid, has come all too true…

(…although I am a bit twisted, ahahahahaha!)    😉


Fishies of Fury!

Posted March 4, 2010 by vulpesffb
Categories: animals, anomalies, environmental, strange happenings, television

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– – I, for one, do not worry excessively about piranha, although Frankie the Fish does tend to annoy me because his McDonald’s jingle sticks inside my head.  (–“Gimme back that Fillet-O-Fish!”)

Anyways, MonsterQuest warned in their current episode that reports of piranha sightings have been growing around the country!–Yes, a Piranha Invasion! Even though these suckers are native to South American countries like Brazil, piranha have reportedly been caught every year for the past three years in the Lake of the Ozarks in Missouri.

So MonsterQuest sent their team to this very location where a baited underwater surveying system was submerged, using what they termed a “dead chicken”  as bait.  While the deceased chicken was shredded up a bit, cameras showed that native fish did it rather than piranha.  The science team additionally ran experiments to see if red-bellied piranha could survive in cold water as would be encountered in the Ozark lake in winter.  They found that the piranha huddled together in temperatures from 55 to 50 degrees, and below that point, they lost their equilibrium and would presumably croak.   Parts of the Ozark lake in question are fed by underwater streams that stay warmer,  possibly in the mid-to upper 50’s range in winter so piranha could survive.

The historical perspectives of the show were to me the most interesting, with reference made to a mega-piranha four times the size of the current model which became extinct ten million years ago.  None less than Teddy Roosevelt gave an account of Amazonian piranha back in 1914 which cemented their reputation as ferocious.  An old grainy black and white photo of about that vintage was also shown depicting a human body stripped to the skeleton supposedly by piranha.  Today, there are dozens of documented piranha attacks in South America, with many of the victims having lost pieces of fingers and toes.

With over 40 different species of piranha, some like the red bellied variety may be better able to survive cold water, and there may be a handful of piranha in the Ozark lake, although probably not a lively breeding population.   Nothing to lose sleep over…

…and maybe next week’s episode on a “Lizard Man” may be more interesting!

Animal Rights and the Orca

Posted March 2, 2010 by vulpesffb
Categories: animal rights, animals, furry causes

Tags: ,

– – In the aftermath of a veteran SeaWorld trainer’s death in Orlando, animal rights activists are questioning whether marine mammals, especially large predators, belong in captivity.

The people who run theme parks, after all, are first and foremost interested in making money; conservation and protection are at best secondary interests.  An orca’s life in captivity in a tank has been compared to keeping a human being in a bathtub for his entire life.   Such captivity causes stress, and stressed-out whales are more likely to injure or kill people.  We tend to think of such whales as “bad animals” when in reality they are wild animals, used to running free in an entire ocean but now confined to what is to them a very small space.

Most Americans have romanticized, artificial notions of sea life perpetuated by such shows as Flipper; the reality is quite different.  Some animal rights organizations like The Humane Society of the United States and the Animal Legal Defense Fund feel that it’s high time for the marine park industry to get out of the captive orca business…

Oh Deer!

Posted March 1, 2010 by vulpesffb
Categories: animal oddities, animals, furry, furry art, strange happenings

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– – A statue of two deer making whoopie in the missionary position caused quite a stir when it graced the Herron School of Art’s campus in Indianapolis in the summer of 2005.– -How deer they! Although the statue left the premises in late 2006, it continues to evoke memories and controversy.

Entitled “Trophy,” the sculpture was crafted by Wim Delvoye, a Belgian artist.  According to him, the statue was never supposed to evoke a sense of shock.  “These animals love each other very much,” he explained.   “Only in the United States was this sculpture regarded as shocking.”

“It is funny, but I see a lot of tenderness in the way they kiss,” noted the artists.  “I tried it with dogs and cats, but it looked like they were fighting.”

(We sophisticates, of course, know that they were wrestling!)

The buck naked statue which you see incompletely here is currently back in Belgium with its creator…

Stand By Your Whale…

Posted February 28, 2010 by vulpesffb
Categories: animal occurrences, animals, furry perspectives

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– – SeaWorld has announced its intention of keeping the killer whale Tilikum, who dispatched veteran trainer Dawn Brancheau earlier this week in front of a horrified audience.  Some have argued that the whale in question should be set free or put to death like a dangerous dog.  Tilikum would not be likely to survive in the wild , however, as he has been captive for so long, and destruction of the animal is not an option either as he’s an important part of the breeding program and a companion to the other whales there.  Brancheau’s sister has commented that the trainer would not have wanted anything done to the whale.

SeaWorld now faces the rather daunting task of reassuring the general public that the parks are safe.  Ordinarily, however, there is virtually no contact between visitors and the orcas at SeaWorld shows, although in the past VIP visitors have occasionally been allowed to come down to the edge of the pools and pet the whales, a  practice which will no longer be allowed.

The attack could actually drive up attendance of teens and young adults at the parks, groups that get excited about risks and the potential for drama…and wouldn’t Stand By Your Whale have been a great Tammy Wynette song?


Pennsylvania’s Pigeon Shoots…

Posted February 27, 2010 by vulpesffb
Categories: animal rights, animals, endangered species, furry causes, furry perspectives

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– – One can be less than fond of pigeons but still abhor their use as living targets.  The practice of live pigeon shoots continues to exist in the state of Pennsylvania despite unsuccessful efforts to eradicate it, drawing the attention of none less than animal rights activist and former long-time game show host Bob Barker! Now pigeon shoots involve hunters firing at birds as they are released from small cages and attempting to fly away, and still takes place through a circuit of gun clubs holding shoots in the fall and winter seasons, typically involving 500 to 1,000 birds and about 40 to 50 shooters.

In 1998, a long-running annual pigeon shoot in the town of Hegins, Pennsylvania came to an end following a Pennsylvania Supreme Court ruling that participants could be guilty of animal cruelty.   An attempt at a statewide ban on such “hunting” failed to be passed by the legislature in 1999, and an updated ban proposed in 2007 remains under debate.

Viewing the infamous Hegins pigeon shoot, together with its use of children in the horrific killings, led one long-term hunter, Steve Hindi, to abandon hunting altogether and found SHARK, “SHowing Animals Respect and Kindness,” a registered non-profit charity that deals with any issue involving violation of the innate rights of living creatures.  SHARK also conducts animal rescues and education projects.–Bravo!

Fatal Killer Whale Attack at SeaWorld

Posted February 25, 2010 by vulpesffb
Categories: animal occurrences, animals

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– -In a horrific attack today witnessed by audiences,  an employee at SeaWorld in Orlando, Florida has died after being attacked by a killer whale.   The employee, a trainer, had just finished explaining to the audience the show that they were about to see when the veteran trainer apparently slipped and fell into the water.   The whale then suddenly came up from the water, grabbed the trainer around the waist, and according to a park guest, “thrashed her all around” to the point that the trainer’s shoe fell off.

Paramedics were summoned to the Shamu Stadium at the theme park just this Wednesday afternoon where they found the trainer who could not be revived.  The death is characterized as a drowning.  Guests were evacuated, and the park was closed.  The bull whale involved, Tilikum, is the largest Orca in captivity, weighing about 12,000 pounds.

The fatal attack was not the first time that a killer whale at a SeaWorld park has turned on a trainer, with a trainer attacked in November of 2006 but escaping with a broken foot…