Archive for the ‘television’ category

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Parasyte: The Grey…Tentacled Horror!

April 13, 2024

I’ve always loved SyFy horror, and the Netflix series Parasyte: The Grey is of that tradition. We’ve seen bits and pieces of like materials before, in such films as Invasion of the Body Snatchers and even Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan. You can watch the spiny little pods descend, and their worm-like spawn wiggle their way into people‘s ears, causing their brains to be consumed, and the hosts to become imitations of the people they once were…but with the capability of emanating deadly tentacles from their heads!

There’s something about tentacles that are Lovecraftian, alien, and deeply disturbing, especially when they’re topping off a human body!  These tentacles are powerful, capable of extending themselves to great lengths, moving heavy objects, and cutting through or slicing through flesh.  It‘s 100% nightmare fuel…

But one young woman assaulted by a psychotic slasher has her assailant terminated by an alien, and is unable to be assimilated because the alien expends too much of its time and energy healing her wounds, leaving her brain and humanity intact while conferring alien powers, and kind of co-habiting with the alien in her body. She uses these otherworldly capabilities to work with the humans (Korean) to fight against the aliens, and some glorious tentacled fights ensue…

The special effects are good, and oddly compelling...and who doesn’t enjoy a good tentacled fight, anyways? 🦊

Categories: aliens, alternative realities, horror, sci fi, television
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Comments: 10 Comments

Allstate’s “Wild Bird” Commercial…

March 19, 2024

Allstate’s Dean Winters as the redoubtable “Mayhem” is doing animal impersonations again, this time as a wild bird stuck in the attic of basketball legend Larry Bird. – -What, you’ve never seen a bird in a suit before?! That absurdity is part of the humor. Well, once again Winters pulls his animal act off, bonking his head against an attic window to show his entrapment, knocking stuff about, and announcing that he’s “going cuckoo…”

All of the ruckus draws the now senior Bird out of his comfy chair into his attic, where he encounters the bird-Winters, and arms himself with a lacrosse stick! “What ‘ya got, Larry? May the best bird win,” declares Winters. It’s no contest, however, as Winters-as-bird handily dodges basketball Bird’s swings. Jumping to reach Winters, Larry Bird crashes through the attic floor, his legs dangling comically through his living room ceiling…

“You may be a legend on the court, but you’re an amateur up here,” mocks wild bird Winters from the rafters. “Now YOU’RE the bird stuck in the attic!”

Once more, nature prevails…as does Dean Winters, whether as a cat, raccoon, deer, St. Bernard puppy, or bird.- – Can he do a fox next?! 🦊

Categories: absurdities, advertising, animal presence, animal problems, anthropomorphic, Brilliant but twisted, furry, furry commercials, humor, television
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Comments: 1 Comment

NJM’s “Private Eye” Commercial…

March 14, 2024

Private eyes…gumshoes…private dicks….I’ve always loved ‘em, especially in retro versions, or neo-ones like Rorschach of Watchmen. So when I saw this private eye walking into a dimly-lit diner, soft jazz playing in the background, this fox was hooked…

This private eye had the full look, complete with fedora and trench coat. His client, however, was an oddball…not that I should talk…and what exactly was he? When I first glimpsed him, I thought that he looked like ALF, the Alien Life Form popular for a few years on 80’s television. He seemed at first to have an elongated snout, and was definitely a furry…

…but no, not ALF. Maybe some kinda bovine, I dunno. Anyway, the detective brought him the information he sought, but he wasn’t gonna like it. It seems, ‘ya see, that NJM only had their customer’s best interests at heart, and there was no way that the mascot client could compete with that…

And ALF, I still remember ‘ya, buddy…but don’t even think about eating my cat!

Categories: advertising, alternative realities, anthropomorphic, furry, furry commercials, television, twisted reality
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Comments: 2 Comments

Arm and Hammer “Crazy Hard” Hardball Litter

March 9, 2024

Those Arm and Hammer cats are back, from the same people who brought you a feline John Travolta at the disco a while back! Disclaimer: If seeing cats in bed makes you feel uncomfortable, stay out of their bedroom! But I’m a furry, this is my world, and so just cope with it, OK? No one forces you to be here, after all… 😸

These cats in their bedroom and alternative universe just love to watch videos of the crazy and stupid things that humans do, the same way that folks in our benighted reality love to watch cat videos…and humans do some stupid things, like throw balls of used cat litter around, to see how hard it is. And how hard are they? Crazy hard!

This is lightweight HardBall Litter, after all, and you can even hit clumps of it with a tennis racket against walls. Or throw it downstairs. – -Tsk, the things that these stoopid hyoomans do! Always makes you laugh, though…

And isn‘t this a handsome couple, just enjoying themselves? So what if they’re sharing a bed? We’ve come a long way as a society since Lucy and Ricky Ricardo had separate twin beds in their bedroom! And how do you suppose that kittens are made? Cats got needs, ‘ya know…but we’re not gonna get into that here, this being a semi-respectable blog, and all. Meow… 🐈🐈‍⬛

Categories: advertising, alternative realities, anthropomorphic, Brilliant but twisted, commercials, furry, furry commercials, television
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Comments: 3 Comments

Aliens, Seeking to Rent…

February 24, 2024

Jeff Goldblum is an awesome dude. He knows dinosaurs, has blended his genes with a fly, and is equally comfortable with aliens, fighting them or otherwise. In a recent Apartments.com commercial, he is part of a group having a first encounter with arthropod aliens that have been described as giant ants, but I also see some resemblance in them to Star Trek’s Species 8472. In either case, they’re quite cool as well. The hard-headed military types in the group of humans seem all too willing to open fire, but Goldblum knows better. These aliens are just looking for a rental apartment, probably in a good location, and not too expensive…

And these aliens argue amongst themselves as to whether they want a one or two bedroom apartment; two would accomodate her mother when she comes to visit, so of course the guy is in favor of a single bedroom model.  In either case, Jeff Goldblum is tuned to their wavelength, and sure to be able to fix them up.  They’re just extraterrentrials.  Some things seem to be universal, after all…  🦊

Categories: advertising, aliens, alternative realities, anthropomorphic, sci fi, television
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Comments: 3 Comments

Progressive Commercial “Sting” Operation…

February 8, 2024

What?!- – Say it ain’t so! Progressive Insurance’s Jamie in cahoots with bank robbers, and ones wearing cat masks, to boot? Well, Jamie is the eternal innocent, and when he signed on to be a wheelman, he didn’t understand that title to mean an escape car driver. Rather, wheelman is an old family name for Jamie..it’s Irish!

So when three cat animal-headed robbers make a hasty exit from the bank, Jamie cheerfully asks them if they’ve gotten their banking done.Unfortunately for the robbers, Jamie’s in no hurry to burn rubber leaving, either.He pulls out slowly, almost immediately stopping at a stop sign where he times the stop by counting 1 Mississippi, 2 Mississippi, etc.Jamie deals with their befuddlement by sharing that he has Progressive’s “Snapshot” feature, which rewards good, but not speedy drivers. These robbers are screwed…

And I guess that you could say that these were cat burglars. I envy them their masks…

Categories: advertising, animal occurrences, anthropomorphic, commercials, furry, furry commercials, fursuits, television
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Comments: 9 Comments

“Disenchantment;” the Middle Ages as Buddy Comedy

January 30, 2024

As Monty Python and the Holy Grail memorably showed us, the Middle Ages were not totally dead and dreary times, especially if approached with a sense of wry humor. Simpsons creator Matt Groening does exactly that in Disenchantment on Netflix, and the series works on many levels, especially if you like history, myth, and satire…

While too complex to adequately cover in a single blog post, the series concerns the life and exploits of a medieval princess, Tiabeanie (Bean for short), a teenaged hellion adept at gambling and barroom-style fighting who has modern sensitivities, and rebels against medieval conventions such as arranged royal marriages…

Seeking to chart her own way through life, Bean is accompanied by mythic medieval companions that mirror the duality of her own nature; an innocent, idealistic elf appropriately named Elfo, and a black demon straight from Hell called Luci (short for Lucifer)…

Luci is my standout favorite in the series, a 9,000-year-old demon as inky-black as the original Felix the Cat, and thought by most who encounter him to be a weird, talking cat. Yes, Luci is the furry character in the series, having horns, fangs, and a forked tail, who despite his denials often postures bodily and presents like a cat. Sent from Hell to guide the Princess towards chaos, indulgence, and destruction, Luci proclaims himself to be “the guy who makes you feel good about doing bad.” This is one cool, laid-back, savvy demon!

This cat-like demon evolves, however, taking a serious liking to Princess Bean, becoming a loyal companion, fighting against her foes, and eventually dying for her…a sacrifice so noble that Luci appears before God in heaven, earning the status of ascended demon, a kind of reverse Lucifer, if you will…a bad guy who becomes good!

So catch Disenchantment on Netflix, if only to visit this fantastic, drinking, smoking, drug-ingesting cat-like thing that I’d be pleased to have in my corner, anytime! Bad boys, of course, can make you feel so good! 🦊

Categories: alternative realities, Brilliant but twisted, cartoons, fantasy, furry, humor, Mythological, television, twisted reality
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Comments: 3 Comments

Dean Winters in “Deer Mayhem…”

January 4, 2024

Dean Winters in his Allstate commercials effectively does a remarkable range of impersonations of objects, types of people, and to my interest, animals. In recent memory he has portrayed a raccoon, large breed puppy, bear, and my personal fave, a cat! Remarkably, he channels all of these creatures with little or no makeup, and often while wearing a suit. He doesn’t require a costume or prosthetics, rendering his minimalist but spot-on impressions by posture, actions, and attitude…

…and so equally masterful is Winters’ impression of a wild deer, emerging from a wooded area chewing on a leaf. He comes to a road, musing “What is this thing?” as he freezes on that surface, because that’s what deer do. Transfixed by the headlights of an approaching car, Winters as deer is thrown up onto the vehicle before landing on the pavement before it, leaving vehicular damage in his wake…

Winters is not a dead deer, however, continuing to address us scuffed up while lying on the road surface. Heck, Mayhem is nigh about indestructible. And if you had Allstate insurance, you might save some bucks, and be saved from Mayhem…like him! 🙀

Categories: advertising, animal spokepersons, anthropomorphic, Brilliant but twisted, furry, furry commercials, television
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Comments: 2 Comments

Sympathy for The Grinch…

December 16, 2023

Please allow me to introduce myself, I’m the Grinch…of Mt. Crumpit!” – -(to the tune of, “Sympathy for the Devil,” by The Rolling Stones)

At this time of year, my thoughts turn naturally to The Grinch. He was, after all, a furry, and like many of us, misunderstood and much-maligned. Max was a furry too, an anthropomorphic dog, loyal and obedient to his master, even if the Ego to the Grinch’s Id. Max I suspect actually liked Xmas, and probably would have affectionately licked any Whos that he came across…

Now, can you imagine being visibly different as a child, then banished to lonely exile on the foreboding heights of Mt. Crumpit? As Kermit the Frog memorably lamented, “It’s not easy being green!”

Is there not, I say, a little bit of the pre-redemptive Grinch in all of us? Who of us has not had dark thoughts after being exposed to Xmas carols and commercials since Halloween? I mean, how many times can you suffer hearing “I Want A Hippopotamus for Xmas” before you utterly lose it?! 🙀

And let’s face it, The Whos were annoying in their relentless cheerfulness. They represented the overkill aspects of Xmas, and holding us all up to an impossible celebratory standard. Clearly, they needed taken down a few pegs, an infusion of Grinchiness…

Even pre-redemptively, The Grinch had some remarkable qualities. He was a survivor, a strong if solitary spirit who was a master strategist and a genius inventor with many skills, kind of the Wile E. Coyote of Xmas characters. His Road Runner was the Xmas overkill that is everywhere at this time of year. I submit to you that The Grinch was a cultural warrior, a tragic hero who only wanted peace and sanity, and perhaps a little Who Hash…

So respect and honor The Grinch, who meant well but whose reach exceeded his grasp. I shall celebrate The Mean One in my heart always, and save him a generous slice of roast beast…🦊

Categories: absurdities, anthropomorphic, Brilliant but twisted, famous furries, fantasy, furry, movies, seasonal, television
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Comments: 3 Comments

NJM’s “Snowman” Commercial…

December 6, 2023

What could be more Christmas-y than a cute, smiling snowman? The one in this NJM insurance commercial is even rather pint-sized, so he’s not particularly menacing. Two kids are crafting the snowman, one of which looks a bit like Ralphie in A Christmas Story. And wouldn’t ‘ya know it, once they put Dad’s ball cap on said snowman, he’s comes to life in the best Frosty the Snowman tradition…

Rather than lead the kids in a parade, this snowman begins to sing about Polar insurance, “the coolest around,” He waves his stick-branch arms cheerfully about. The kids scream, and run away; Mom and Dad are still standing there, however, and the insurance-shilling snowman asks them if they have any hot chocolate. One wonders if the snowman has a death wish…

For a company that prides itself in having no mascots, NJM has produced for us some of the best mascots around…a variety, no less!

Categories: absurdities, advertising, alternative realities, Brilliant but twisted, commercials, humor, television, twisted reality
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Comments: 2 Comments

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