It’s hard to believe that The X-Files aired thirty years ago, and equally hard to fathom that David Duchovny is now 64 years old. Rejoice at least that the guy who brought Fox Mulder of the FBI to life is hosting and producing a new 10-part documentary show on the History Channel called, “Secrets Declassified” that may at least have something of an X-Files vibe to it…
David Duchovny and mysterious secrets seem to go together, and the series promises to “profile thegovernment’smost secretive, strange and mind-blowing activities that have been declassified throughout history.” Topics will, of course, include Area 51...
Secrets Declassifiedwill premiere on The History Channel April 4th, and I’m on board for it!
People or furries who go to salons or beauticians seeking a “whole new look” are brave souls. I have worn the same hairstyle for decades, knowing what helps me blend in so I can almost pass for human…
Alpacas are adorable animals; who doesn’t like them? And so it’s easy to relate to this courageous little alpaca in the NJM Insurance commercial who goes to their salon seeking that total makeover. Her hairstylist is up for the challenge,and so demonstrates a variety of different styles on the client…
One hairstyle looks rather EMO; another is a Mohawk. Still a third may be a Mullet. But our customer Alpaca isn’t quite satisfied with any of these possibilities…
Sothe alpaca’s stylist summons the salon’s master stylist, Gloria. That woman appears in a portal, and in greeting says, “Come to Momma!” The alpaca makes a sound that may be a mixture of fear and excitement. Be careful what you wish for, I guess!
“Whatcha doin’,” inquires hubby of his wife in this recent NJM Insurance commercial. “Just shopping for new car insurance,” she chirps while on the internet. That’s all it takes, apparently, because then the Mascots come!
A bear is repeatedly ringing the doorbell…a rabbit is knocking on the window…the phone is ringing insistently…windows are popping up on the computer…and a pair of bird legs is struggling to emerge from the fireplace!
“We should have known!,” despairs hubby as he grabs an umbrella to jab at the bird legs, and repel the invader!
Now I, for one, have always wanted to seek out the furry mascot army, and join their hellish crusade, so I would embrace the invaders, and go off with them! Just let me grab my fox fursuit. – -My time would have finally arrived, Ahahahaha! 🦊
(What?! – –You think I’d rather watch the Trump coronation?! Not in this life! 😼 )
Aww!–It’s Xmas season again! And what could be a better antidote for that than Dean Winters playing an overworked elf!? Doesn’t the above scene look Christmas-y? A coating of snow, seasonal yard decor, and…gasp!– –Santa and his sleigh on the rooftop!
But there’s a rub…the Mayhem dude is playing Santa’s overworked assistant, and he’s ready to call it a night! Mayhem is wearing his suit, but clearly the worse for the wear. There’s soot on his face, maybe some bruises,and his tie is askew…it’s been a long night! Clearly, the elves need to unionize..
But I’ve always disliked elves of the relentlessly-cheerful variety. I like my elves world-weary, and a bit sarcastic, and Winters fits that bill perfectly! He’s already had a hard night, and so when he hands Santa his pack (“here you go, Boss!”), he fumbles, and the gifts go tumbling down the chimney! It gets worse, too, ’cause there a fire burning in the hearth! An expensive Apple laptop impacts and is broken open, and other gifts ignite! If you have ever dropped electronic devices even a short distance much less ignited them, you’ll know that this does not bode well for their functionality. Yuppers, Allstate insurance sure is needed for protection of these electronics, or as as our elf tells us, you’ll be “Ho-ho-SO out of luck!“
I alsolove the fact that Winters apparently has names for the reindeer other than what we are used to, referring to one of them as “Cliffton.” I’d be in favor of re-naming most of the reindeer, giving them relatable names such as Frank, Harry, and Clyde. This reindeer looks somewhat startled by the spectacle that he has just witnessed…
Dean Wintershas given us Xmas elves before, memorably playing The Elf on the Shelf just a few years back. That elf was dressed in traditional elfish attire, and as human-sized, brought the shelf down that he was sitting on due to his weight. “Elf down!- -Elf down!,” he alerted from the floor…
So enjoyDean Winters in this year’s holiday offering…he’s a national treasure, really!
“I’m not a “rainbows and unicorns” kinda guy, but this brief NJM commercial features a well-rendered unicorn in a very Arthurian atmosphere…
When two guys go traipsing through a pristine and dense unspoiled forest talking about the one’s car, ethereal fantasy-type music plays, and a majestic white unicorn appears between some trees! He’s anthropomorphic and so can speak, of course, so he comments that the most magical things about NJM insurance is that they put their customers first. When asked by one of the two guys if he’s a mascot, the unicorn adamantly denies it, and proclaims that he’s just a fan of the insurance. Unicorns, if memory serves, could best be tamed by a virgin…
I guess that we could all use an occasional unicorn in our lives, which beats a pesky insurance salesman any day…
Exploding Kittens on Netflix is a hoot, although not for those who prefer their religion unpilloried…
It seems that God is felt by a divine council to need to be rehabilitated, and so He is sent to Earth in the form of a talking cat, devoid of his most useful but not all powers. He is to help a human family who prayed for his assistance, all the while contending against a similar demonic cat sent to thwart him… 🙀
This is pretty wild stuff that plays like Sunday School on heavy psychoactive medication. God-Cat has not long arrived on Earth before He is corralled by an animal control officer, and sedated. He escapes confinement, and goes on as a strange mixture of deity, human, and feline, railing against his cat incarnation while gradually embracing it. He learns the ways of man, and has frequent epic but hilarious battles against the opposing Devil-Cat.
You might say that God becomes a better fur-son because of all this, but you’ll just have to watch Exploding Kittens to learn of all the enabling details… Meow! 😸
(Foxsylvania proudly endorses Harris-Walz in 2024!)
I didn’t like the version of Riddler or Batman that we saw in the movie The Batman, but I did like the version of Catwoman and The Penguin that we saw. We saw a bit of “Oz Cobb”(Oswald Cobblepot) in The Batman, enough to make me want to see more. Fortunately, Colin Farrell is back as The Penguin, and he makes the role both gritty and believable…
(Don’t hate him because he’s beautiful!)
Sure, Danny DeVito and Burgess Meredith gave us memorable versions of The Penguin that were fun, but so cartoonish that they couldn’t possibly exist in reality. Colin Farrell’s Penguin is no outrageous freak show with a pointed beak-like nose and flipper fingers, but rather a master gangster-like figure, perhaps what Tony Soprano could have been if he were far nastier and battle-scarred. Colin Farrell is a good-lookin’ actor who plays Penguin under heavy latex modifications that gives him a larger (but not beak-like) nose, extra pounds, and facial scarring. His hairline is receding and slicked back, and he walks with a pronounced side-to-side limp, perhaps a nod to the character’s waddle in previous incarnations. We see his bare foot in one scene, and it’s hideously deformed. This Penguin (who doesn’t like to be called that) knows his way around a knife and a machine gun, and wouldn’t be caught dead tooling around in a giant rubber ducky like Danny DeVitoin the role…
Robin Lord Taylor got the role of the young Penguin much better and more realistic in the series Gotham, in my opinion. This guy was intelligent, adaptable, and ruthless…
So I’m glad to see this re-imagining of Penguin, and see the character given proper respect. No, he’s not my favorite Bat-villain, coming in my hierarchy after The Riddler and Joker. The limited HBO/HBO Max series takes up right after Riddler has flooded parts of Gotham in The Batman flick, and Oz Cobb is looking to fill in the gap in the power vacuum following the death of his bosswith a mixture of shrewdness and brutality. No, you won’t see Batman in this, but he is out there, and no one knows just where. This is a crime drama told from the point of view of The Penguin himself…
Only the first episode of the series has aired as of this posting, and there are nods to the character’s comic roots in his gait and his use of an umbrella in the episode. Involved in the drug trade, this is Penguin as a tough, ruthless crime boss looking to climb the ladder, and this bird just might fly… 🐧
The buffalo in the Buffalo Wild Wings commercials appears to be a party animal, and as he shows in the Box Out ad, is a bit of the “bull in the china shop” beast as well, not that a pub equates to a china shop! The buffalo spokes-animal still manages to trash stuff pretty impressively, and that’s without being mad!
I’ve always kinda admired the Wild Wings buffalo as a rather well-rendered and impressive chimera, and he’s certainly articulate and expressive to the point of being brash or domineering. I doubt that his wings would be adequate, however, to enable flight, and support his massive bulk. They’re nice wings, nonetheless...
The buffalo, whose name is Hank, is voiced by Beck Bennett. Crafted for the March Madness event, the commercial is certainly mad and wild. Hank, who thinks that he knows a bit about playing defense, goes into a demonstration by unintentionally knocking people about, even breaking out the window, complete with a bodily ejection and flying glass. One would certainly want to be on this bison’s team, as his opponents might not survive him!
I’ve never posted about a buffalo before, but Hank does cut an impressive and imposing furry figure in this ad; you’d just want to think twice about inviting him to your apartment, however! Unanswered are the questions of whether Hank will be held liable for damages…
And BTW, this fox was born in Buffalo, New York!
And by the way, I just happen to have been born in Buffalo, New York! My university mascot was a bison!
For a company that disavows mascots, NJM insurance presents a lot of mascots of the fictitious competition, and they frequently are pretty good! These dastardly mascots also try their best to cover up advertising copy for NJM. As this commercial begins, we are shown a peacock who spreads his tail feathers at a bus stop to cover a posted ad for NJM. Then at an office, the purple arm of some thing appears to close the lid of a laptop that might be preparing to display NJM copy. A large green” Kraken” hangs from the roof of a bus to spread its tentacles over an NJM ad. Lastly, a bear using a riding mower runs over and thoroughly shreds a delivered newspaper bearing NJM ad copy, pieces of which then float in the air like confetti around a bewildered homeowner…
It’s no “secret,” you see, that NJMinsurance is so good that it stands on its own merits, and doesn’t need mascots…
There’s a strange live-action/animated anthology TV series hosted by “Bill” (Bill Leff ) , MeTV’s “cartoon curator,” along with his puppet friend, Toony the Tuna. One does not often see a fish co-hosting a TV show, much less a talking fish apparently comfortable out of water, but Toony manages. Toony even sports wardrobe changes!
Each show contains four to six animated shorts taken from classic cartoon shows, including Looney Tunes/Merrie Melodies, Tom and Jerry, Betty Boop, Popeye, Woody Woodpecker, and a number pf others. The shows featured mostly aired from the 1950’s through the 1990’s. In between cartoons, Bill and Toony banter about what the cartoons illustrate, as well as issues around the studio. The show can be mildly educational at times…
While the MeTV show airs early weekdays in many areas for just an hour, a more comprehensive 24-hour a day version called MeTV Toons began in late June, and is available through subscription, or if you’re fortunate enough may be available through your cable package in your local area. Several complete episodes are available for free through YouTube. At any rate, it’s nice to see a series dedicated to the airing of classic ‘toons, and we’ll just hope that Toony doesn’t wind up in a casserole or someone’s sandwich…
FOXSYLVANIA 
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