Archive for the ‘bizarre’ category

Creative Taxidermy…

July 17, 2013

20130717-134207.jpg— As an episode of the Weird or What series hosted by William Shatner would remind us (Aliens Walk Among Us), some candidates for new and unknown species have been nothing more than the products of creative taxidermy, fueled by the simple public desire to believe. The desire to believe is an incredibly powerful thing, intoxicating and seductive. If we are not careful, that desire can cause us to suspend reason and logic.

I would like to believe in monsters. They are intriguing, can be romantic, and give me a warm fuzzy feeling inside! Existentially, we all ask, “Is that all there is?” Assuming the existence of monsters can give many of us the intangible thing that we seek, the hope that there is something more beyond the evidence of our senses. Feeding the public desire and demand for monsters has been a lucrative occupation for centuries, leading in the era of P.T. Barnum to the manufacture of the Fiji Mermaid, a sewn-together linkage of a monkey’s upper body with the lower body of a large fish.  In far more recent times, the Metepec Creature served a similar function, with the skinned and otherwise altered remains of a spider monkey or similar primate masquerading as an unknown species or alien.

To show the relative ease of creating an otherworldly-appearing corpse, a taxidermist on the Weird or What Show took a skinned squirrel and paired it to the skull of a small primate which had been additionally modified to make it appear even more human-like. The results were both stomach-churning and disquieting, looking as convincing as many specimens submitted as “proof”of unknown life or aliens.  Dare to believe, but never forsake science and credibility.  Occam’s Razor is a good litmus test; the simplest explanation is usually the correct one…

 

Manchester’s Rotating Egyptian Statue…

June 25, 2013

statue– – I love the notion of accursed artifacts, articles from antiquity bearing some kind of spell, curse, or enchantment.  Because of this, I think it’s totally cool that an ancient Egyptian statuette in the Manchester Museum in Great Britain is rotating seemingly on its own, and sensibly away from visiting tourists!  This ten-inch high statue, an offering to Osiris the ancient Egyptian God of Death,  dates back to about 1800 BC, and has been in the museum’s collection for about 80 years.

Some, of course, are claiming that supernatural forces are behind the statue’s rotation, while physicist Brian Cox offers the explanation that the movement is a function of differential friction, where the subtle vibrations of passing foot traffic make the statue move; the statuette only moves in the daytime during museum hours.  But before we call out the Hardy boys or arm mummy nemesis Brendan Fraser with a gun, perhaps we should harken to the inscription on the back of the figure, and provision it with the beer, bread, and beef that it’s calling for from one of the many excellent English pubs about…

“Fleshy Corpses” and Other Fun Things…

May 9, 2013

sea monster

– – I’m always interested in unidentifiable mystery carcasses washing up on shore!  It’s better still if bathers are on the beach when it happens.  Submitted for your approval is this rather ferocious and prehistoric-looking specimen which washed up on Pukehina Beach in New Zealand…and no, I did not make up the name “Pukehina,” although it serves my purposes well.  About 9 meters in length with the lower part of the body mostly entrails from an attack, speculations soon surfaced that the remains were some kind of sea monster.   It probably didn’t smell like roses, either!

A marine mammal expert, however, has identified the remains as most likely being those of a killer whale, or orca.  When creatures wash ashore in a severe state of decomposition, they really don’t look their best, you see, and may not even look much like they did in life.   Bizarre-looking carcasses have been misidentified as sea monsters or even dinosaurs for generations.  Some masses of tissue brought up by the sea are so far gone as to be called, “blobsters.”  

In 1896, for example, a massive, six-foot-high “fleshy corpse” came ashore at St. Augustine, Florida.  After lots of speculation and probably gagging, a naturalist of the time decided that it was some kind of giant octopus previously unknown to science.  Then in 2003, something 40 feet long weighing 13 tons washed ashore on a beach in Chile.  Labeled the “Chilean Blob,” the remains were determined to be whale blubber.   More recently in 2008, I’m sure we can all remember the Montauk Monster, although this was much more modestly sized, being by most estimations the remains of a raccoon or a boxer dog.  Hopefully some more good stuff will wash up sometime soon, giving us material to write about!

…Anyways, there’s gotta be a really memorable bad movie for the Syfy channel lurking amidst all of this talk of fleshy corpses and bizarre-looking carcasses…Attack of the Blobster, maybe, I dunno…