– – Worldly philosophers have debated this one for eons: Which came first, the chicken, or the egg? In this short commercial for DirecTV, we see a chicken voiced by John Goodman answer his door to behold…an egg distinguishable only by eyeglassses! Well, the egg (voiced by Steve Buscemi) winds up on the chicken’s couch in a homey-looking room where they debate the chicken vs. egg issue while promoting DirecTV. The chicken gets the last word in…
Archive for June 2011
The Chicken or The Egg?
June 29, 2011Don’t Forget To Duck!
June 27, 2011
– – A bus-sized asteroid with the catchy name of 2011 MD will pass within about 7,500 miles of the Earth on Monday, June 27th…a near-miss in astronomical terms. An object of this size can be expected to come this close to Earth about every six years or so on average.
Asteroid 2011 MD will be visible in moderately-large amateur telescopes, measuring 9 to 30 meters wide with the best guess about 10 meters. There is no chance that the asteroid will impact with the earth, and even if it entered the atmosphere it wouldn’t likely reach the Earth’s surface…no planet-killer, this. After making its closest pass at Earth, the asteroid will zoom through the zone of geosynchronous satellites, but is also extremely unlikely to hit any space junk…unless Lone Star and Barf are out there in their space Winnebago, seeking Princess Vespa!
“Bigfoot” Hair and Oil Samples to Undergo DNA Testing…
June 25, 2011
– – Samples of hair hoped or thought to be from a Bigfoot have yielded disappointing results in the past few years when subjected to scientific analysis; some have been found to be from a bison, others from a humble opossum. Here we go again with hair and oil samples left on a pickup truck in California’s Sierra National Forest over Memorial Day! Dirt and oil impressions left on the passenger side window may be from a Bigfoot, or they may be bear slobber and snot; a twelve-inch footprint was also found at the site. An even larger creature left impressions on the driver’s side window which included prints of a nose, eyes, and lips…the lips measuring about six inches long.
Friends of the pickup truck’s owner who have observed the evidence include a former science teacher and a correctional officer. They doubt that a bear was responsible for the intrusion as none of four ice chests filled with food in the back of the truck had been touched. DNA samples collected by a forensic expert may eventually shed light on the identity of the unknown intruder, although if the sample comes back having tested as near human or primate, it could match both Bigfoot and a homeless person…
“Pudding Face” Jello Commercial…
June 23, 2011
– – If ever human beings were in screaming need of plastic surgery, it is the “pudding face” people pictured in Jell-O commercials. The facial images presented are disturbingly creepy, reminding me somewhat of Jack Nicholson’s portrayal of The Joker; the commercials don’t inspire me to go out and buy Jello (“Gee!– -I wanna look like that!”), but rather to collect money to buy the poor afflicted souls with the condition prompt surgical correction (“Give generously, or “Pudding Face” is forever!”). An army of zombies with “Pudding Face” would be too horrible to imagine. It’s one of those things so weird and repugnant that you wish you could look away, but you somehow can’t help but stare at the image, as if it were a decayed mummy…
Green Light for “The Lantern”
June 21, 2011
– – Movies about comic book heroes tend to be at least somewhat disappointing if not outright disasters, and the reception for “The Green Lantern” has been at best lukewarm. I can’t claim to be wholly objective about the movie, having been a big long-term fan of the comic book and the title character; with this bias remembered and acknowledged, I did find the movie a hoot, and wasn’t disappointed; the pluses at least outweighed the negatives.
Sitting in the darkened theater wearing my geeky 3D glasses and waiting for endless commercials and promos to end, I pondered how much the 3D filming would add to my theater experience; it certainly added $3 to my ticket price. Perhaps in any sequel, the Green Lantern could take on evil surcharges! Ryan Reynolds as Hal Jordan I feel was a good choice for the Green Lantern; he’s muscular without being bulky, and played the character well with a mixture of cockiness and vulnerability. The CGI Green Lantern suit with its Kato-type mask was impressive if unreal, and Hal Jordan flies in a wonderful floaty style, at times striking poses that are classically Green Lantern. With some but not enough of the action set in deep space, you also get to meet all too briefly a variety of intriguing aliens who constitute the “Green Lantern Corps,” cosmic good guys who serve as protectors of peace and justice; some of Jordan’s training occurs at the hands of a massive and harsh alien drill instructor.
The Green Lantern has a rich and rather complex mythology which I won’t go into here in detail, but suffice it to say that Green Lanterns can manipulate the energy of will into any kind of physical matter and utilize it; Superman can’t even do this stuff! A yellow energy drawing on fear represents their major opposition, with a creature utilizing it called Parallax who reminds me of “the Blob” or perhaps a dirty version of assorted nasty entities from Star Trek. When the best warriors of the Green Lantern Corps go to do battle with Parallax, it’s like the Federation fighting the Borg at Wolf 359 with similar results.
After Hal Jordan fights Hector Hammond, a catspaw of Parallax on earth who undergoes a repulsive metamorphosis, the ultimate showdown occurs in space…and if you see the movie, stay through the closing credits to see Sinestro turn to the Dark Side and hint at room for sequels! While not a perfect movie, with tweaking to emphasize the iconic Green Lantern elements this could be a worthwhile series…
The Keyboard Cat!
June 19, 2011
– – Cats on keyboards are nothing new with the original video coming from the early 1980’s, but this incarnation of Keyboard Cat, also known as Pistachio Cat, is awfully cute! Wearing an oversized lime green T-shirt and playing a bouncy little number on the keyboard while promoting pistachio consumption, this cat is likely to win your heart.- -So what if the cat appears mad at times and is being controlled by human hands hidden under the baggy shirt?- -It’s no wonder that as it was sung in The Aristocats, “everybody wants to be a cat!”
By the way, the current Keyboard Cat’s name is Bento, and he is the creation of Charlie Schmidt…
Necomimi; Brainwave-Controlled Cat Ears!
June 17, 2011
– – Japan has done it again! You may know that there are brainwave-controlled wheelchairs, so why not brainwave-controlled cat ears? The devices by the electronics company Neurowear, dubbed Necomimi, stand up when the wearer concentrates or sees something interesting. When you relax, your decreasing brain activity makes the ears fall down.- –I swear I am not making this up!
I wish that they had made the ears more realistic, and that a fox model was available! I don’t know what would happen if you strapped the ears onto an actual cat. Still, the idea keys into the notion of an augmented human body, and possibly a tail will follow that responds to brain waves; this may be furry of the future…
– -These Rats ROCK!!!
June 15, 2011
– – Remember the giant talking ants in earlier Orkin commercials?- -Well, no rat finks these, the latest Orkin commercial features a duo of really rad anthropoid rats playing hot licks on guitars in the living room of a nice suburban home that the family of four in residence comes home to unexpectedly.–Alright, the rats are a bit on the scruffy side and they’ve made a little mess on the floor, but damn, these rodents ROCK!!!- -Think Stephen King meets Jimi Henrix!
The one rat looks positively evil when he chides the family for coming home early, but hey, did you want Justin Bieber?- -These rats have got what it takes, and they know how to use it! They even offer the boy in the family a gig playing drums for them!- –Take it, you fools, don’t you know a gift when you see it?! – –I’ll play drums for them if the kid doesn’t want it, we’d RULE!!! (I can see it now…Foxy and the Vermin, Live In Concert!)
When the rats are driven out by the Orkin man (imagines voice of Stewie from Family Guy, “Damn you, Orkin man!”), they even split in a totally cool rat rod! Don’t drive these rats out, suburban white bread family!- – Sign them to a contract…FAST!!!- –These boys have a future!
Mountain Lions in Connecticut!
June 14, 2011
– – Mountain lions are said not to exist in Connecticut. The problem is, however, mountain lions don’t read, and nobody thought to tell them; they just don’t appreciate that the nearest confirmed population of their kind is in Missouri. As if to reinforce to one mountain lion that he was extinct, an SUV plowed into one on the Wilbur Cross Parkway earlier this month.
Now where do non-indigenous species come from? Most likely, a rather lively trade in wild animals that is fueled by the internet. While some states have laws prohibiting private ownership of non-native animals such as big cats, bears, wolves, and chimpanzees other states do not…and this patchwork quilt of different laws from state to state allows the irresponsible to travel to nearby states to make exotic animal purchases. Sadly, illegal trafficking in exotic animals is a global business worth up to $20 billion annually. A lot of the local exotic animal trade is fed by zoo or circus surplus, the descendents of those animals, or from breeders.
The eastern mountain lion slain may have been held in captivity, and either escaped or was released. Irresponsible human behaviors continue to claim animal victims in this manner…
(…tip o’ the pen to carycomic!)
Chimp Attack Victim Gets New Face
June 12, 2011
– – We had posted here following the incident of the horrendous chimp attack in 2009 that left Charla Nash blind, disfigured, and handless. In a 20-hour transplant operation last month, a 30-member surgical team performed a full face and double hand transplant at Brigham and Women’s Hospital, a medical first in the United States.
While the donor hands failed to thrive due to impaired blood flow from pneumonia and were subsequently removed, the full facial transplant, only the third to be performed in the United States, appears promising. The donated tissue is expected to conform to Nash’s underlying bone structure, allowing her in time to look somewhat like she did before the attack...
FOXSYLVANIA 
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