Archive for the ‘television’ category

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Return of the Slowskys…

July 16, 2011

 – -I have to admit that I’m not a big fan of turtles, and if I want to see something move at glacial speed, I’ll go to Walmart and play “dodge-’em” with the senior shoppers obstructing the aisles there.  The Comcast (now rebranded Xfinity) spokes-turtles, the Slowskys, have been on hiatus for a long time…but would you expect anything else from them?  We last saw the turtle couple, Karolyn and Bill, in 2009.  In the latest Xfinity spot, we learn what the leisurely-pace lovers have been doing in those intervening years…procreating! 

Well, we won’t get into the gritty mechanics of reptilian sex here, as this ain’t that kind of blog…and although he’s been a long time in coming,  offspring Stanley (aka “Bill Jr.”) is at last here, and he’s cute as a button, even boasting toys like a rubber ducky in the comfortable-appearing Slowsky home…

Categories: animals, anthropomorphic, furry commercials, television
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Comments: 3 Comments

“Legend Quest” Coming on Syfy…

July 12, 2011

 – – For those of you interested in the kind of drek that I am, heaven help you…and you may want to give the upcoming Legend Quest series a look as it begins on the Syfy channel this July 13th at 10 P.M.  Billed as an action-adventure series, this Quest will follow Ashley Cowie, an archaeological explorer and expert in ancient symbols as he and his team travel the world in search of some of history’s greatest and most mysterious artifacts.  All of the elusive items are believed to hold hidden powers and mystical significance for ancient and modern cultures, and will include such items as King Arthur’s sword Excaliber and the Holy Grail.

Up first is a twin billing with the Ark of the Covenant and a Mayan Talking Cross featured…

Categories: strange, television, unexplained, unidentified, weird
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Comments: 4 Comments

DQ’s “Rock ‘N’ Roll Falcon

July 8, 2011

 – – Falcons seem to be going through a surge in commercial popularity, and Dairy Queen has also come to realize that animal spokesmen sell.  They’ve then given us an all too brief glimpse of one of the most awesome birds yet to be seen on television,  the Rock ‘N’ Roll Falcon!  This is one bird who knows how to do wing gestures, and who also talks the talk; “It’s good to be back in Boston, YEEAAH!”  If used as a front man, this falcon could guarantee that a band’s album would go platinum!

Dairy Queen had earlier given us such things as kittens floating in bubbles as well…

Categories: animals, cool things, feathered friends, furry, furry commercials, television
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The State Farm Falcon Commercial…

July 6, 2011

– – Insurance companies seem to be competing these days over who can produce the most off-the-wall commercials, and State Farm is in the running with an ad featuring a couple walking down a surreal street populated by a number of people, many of whom are carrying strange objects such as a gumball machine or a stuffed moose head.- -Well, it seems our man on the street has been saved sufficient money that he’s invested it in a falcon, which we see perched on his gloved arm.  Others beholding the falcon are envious, and make comments to the effect, “Aww, I could have got a falcon!”  The couple call their State Farm agent and thank him for buying them a falcon, but he denies having done that, maintaining that he simply saves people money, and that what they do with it is their concern.

Despite the fact that the peregrine falcon is magnificent, it should be pointed out that they are classified as raptors, the possession of which generally requires state and federal permits that can take years to acquire as well as specialized knowledge about their care and handling.  You can’t just go out and buy one at Walmart, no matter how much money you’ve saved! 

Categories: absurdities, animals, feathered friends, furry commercials, strange, television
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The Chicken or The Egg?

June 29, 2011

– – Worldly philosophers have debated this one for eons:  Which came first, the chicken, or the egg?   In this short commercial for DirecTV, we see a chicken voiced by John Goodman answer his door to behold…an egg distinguishable only by eyeglassses!   Well, the egg (voiced by Steve Buscemi) winds up on the chicken’s couch in a homey-looking room where they debate the chicken vs. egg issue while promoting DirecTV.  The chicken gets the last word in…

Categories: absurdities, animals, anthropomorphic, Brilliant but twisted, furry commercials, television
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“Pudding Face” Jello Commercial…

June 23, 2011

 – – If ever human beings were in screaming need of plastic surgery, it is the “pudding face” people pictured in Jell-O commercials.  The facial images presented are disturbingly creepy, reminding me somewhat of Jack Nicholson’s portrayal of The Joker; the commercials don’t inspire me to go out and buy Jello (“Gee!– -I wanna look like that!”), but rather to collect money to buy the poor afflicted souls with the condition prompt surgical correction (“Give generously, or “Pudding Face” is forever!”).  An army of zombies with “Pudding Face” would be too horrible to imagine.   It’s one of those things so weird and repugnant that you wish you could look away, but you somehow can’t help but stare at the image, as if it were a decayed mummy…

Categories: strange, television, weird
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The Keyboard Cat!

June 19, 2011

 – – Cats on keyboards are nothing new with the original video coming from the early 1980’s, but this incarnation of Keyboard Cat, also known as Pistachio Cat, is awfully cute!  Wearing an oversized lime green T-shirt and playing a bouncy little number on the keyboard while promoting pistachio consumption, this cat is likely to win your heart.- -So what if the cat appears mad at times and is being controlled by human hands hidden under the baggy shirt?- -It’s no wonder that as it was sung in The Aristocats, “everybody wants to be a cat!”


By the way, the current Keyboard Cat’s name is Bento, and he is the creation of Charlie Schmidt…

Categories: animals, Brilliant but twisted, furry, furry commercials, humor, television
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– -These Rats ROCK!!!

June 15, 2011

 – – Remember the giant talking ants in earlier Orkin commercials?- -Well, no rat finks these, the latest Orkin commercial features a duo of really rad anthropoid rats playing hot licks on guitars in the living room of a nice suburban home that the family of four in residence comes home to unexpectedly.–Alright, the rats are a bit on the scruffy side and they’ve made a little mess on the floor, but damn, these rodents ROCK!!!- -Think Stephen King meets Jimi Henrix!

The one rat looks positively evil when he chides the family for coming home early, but hey, did you want Justin Bieber?- -These rats have got what it takes, and they know how to use it!  They even offer the boy in the family a gig playing drums for them!- –Take it, you fools, don’t you know a gift when you see it?! – –I’ll play drums for them if the kid doesn’t want it, we’d RULE!!!  (I can see it now…Foxy and the Vermin, Live In Concert!)

When the rats are driven out by the Orkin man (imagines voice of Stewie from Family Guy, “Damn you, Orkin man!”), they even split in a totally cool rat rod!  Don’t drive these rats out, suburban white bread family!- – Sign them to a contract…FAST!!!- –These boys have a future! 


Categories: absurdities, animals, anthropomorphic, Brilliant but twisted, furry, television
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Furry Friendly: The Stanley Steemer Man

June 8, 2011

 – – Alright, he’s not the Green Lantern, but the Stanley Steemer technician is quietly awesome, a man who goes beyond dedication to outright fanaticism.  He is absolutely passionate about his job, in one spot throwing himself upon a trashed carpet by the curb and bewailing its fate.  “Why, WHY?!,” he moans with anguished soul.  “I could have saved this one!- -I could have SAVED this one!,” he sobs as if in a Shakespearean tragedy. 

In another spot, the dedicated cleaner asks an associate if he’s ever cleaned up after an alpaca.  “It was awesome!,” he enthuses.  Evidently the carpet-cleaning needs of a home with multiple preschoolers, free-range chickens, and an alpaca are all in a day’s work for this unsung hero.

More recently, the Stanley Steemer man is regarding a carpet stain, and mentions that no mammal in the household will accept ownership of it.  “But now is not the time for blame,” he philosophizes, “now is the time for action!” 

He’s probably deranged, but I’m so glad that the Stanley Steemer man is on our side!

Categories: absurdities, Brilliant but twisted, television
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Comments: 4 Comments

Bears – “That’s Amazing” Geico Commercial!

June 2, 2011

 – – Worldly philosophers have long pondered the question, “Do bears (defecate) in the woods?”

Well, this one shown by Geico does…respectably, using a privy, of course!  And this bear is also equipped with a newspaper tucked under his arm and reading glasses!  Realizing that others may be waiting to use the facility, he leaves when his business is done.- -What more can the observing biker say other than, “That’s amazing!”

While perhaps not as brilliant but twisted as the gecko, caveman, or question guy commercials, this “amazing” furry commercial bears a look!– -With Geico, you never know what’s bruin…

Categories: absurdities, anthropomorphic, Brilliant but twisted, cool things, furry commercials, humor, television
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Comments: 2 Comments

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