Archive for the ‘furry’ category

“The Great Wolves Have Arrived” Commercial…

November 18, 2022

The Great Wolf Lodge commercials can be somewhat disconcerting. They are enormous wolves, you see, of a size that makes even dire wolves look wimpy. Fortunately they are friendly, and you ride them like oversized horses to the Great Wolves Lodge resorts…

A mother leaves work to find a Great Wolf waiting for her, and so rides him to pick up her son at school, even though the son would be barely a morsel for the wolf should he turn predacious. But not to worry! These wolves are just the iconic mascots for the family indoor water parks, which started in Wisconsin in 1997, and now have 19 locations…

Nothing brings the pack together like a trip to one of their indoor water resorts, so the commercial’s tagline is to “strengthen the pack!” We may all be grateful that these fantasy wolves are both imaginary and quite docile… 🦊

https://fb.watch/gT8kNjTyYx/


The Curse of the Collector…

November 10, 2022

Many people collect stuff, certain stuff, that is. It can be as common as baseball cards, a bit further out like comic books (just of a certain type, of course!), or highly specialized, like those collectors of figurines of pigs, cows, frogs, unicorns, clowns, Santa, or whatever. Some people collect pens, paperweights, matchbook covers, post cards, even electrical insulators. My mother collected antique bottles, much like those pictured above. The bottles in turn collected dust, although they did look pretty on window shelves with light passing through them.

Now collecting things can be considered a hobby, but if it gets out of hand can become an obsession, an addiction, or a form of obsessive-compulsive behavior. At the very least, you can soon wind up with storage problems for your “collection.” If uncontrolled, some collections can take over rooms, or even entire houses…

Now collections represent pet interests that largely are not shared with the general population. Others may regard your collection as “over-the-top” or weird. A collection is more a labor of love than a real financial investment, and their value is a niche market restricted to other collectors of the same thing. Few are those who have financed a college education with their “Beanie Baby” collection…

So if your plushie collection is getting out of hand, it may be time for your “higher self” to ask the collector in you, “Why are you doing this?!,” and break out of the collection cycle. But I’m keeping my foxes, anyways. Maybe I’m just trying to reproduce, I dunno… 🦊

Hail, Halloween!

October 31, 2022

Awash in Halloween here, and even though I haven’t worn a costume other than my partial fursuit in decades, I still as an adult get excited about Halloween. Now there are those who are already putting up Xmas decorations, but I feel that they should be taken out and maimed…we predators can do that!

Ahh, who can forget the giddy delight of slapping on a cheap store-bought Ben Cooper Halloween costume, and staggering half-blind around your neighborhood in the cold and dark to extort candy from the neighbors? The above leopard model was my last true Halloween costume, kind of a gateway to the furry fandom. I think that another kid just about pulled my leopard tail off, too. Are you not terrified of me?- -RAWR! Fear the cheesy leopard!

Nowadays, I have much better options to wear.- – Err, mask?- – WHAT mask?! I kinda look more like a werefox in this photo, but you know how unruly your fur can be when you first get up in the morning, right? Gotta do some grooming, plus drink that all-important cup of coffee before I scare small children by my appearance. But to you, good readers, I show my true self…

So blessed Halloween, come! I’m much more comfortable in your world than in mine, anyways…and everyday can be Halloween, if you truly believe! 🦊

Amazon’s “Red Riding Hood” Ad…

October 28, 2022

We seem to be posting a lot about wolves lately, but hey, Halloween is coming, and we gotta run with the pack, so to speak. So much has been written about Little Red Riding Hood that it’s practically a cottage industry, which may be appropriate since Grandma kinda lived in a cottage, don’t ‘ya know?

Well, Little Red here might be little, but she’s kinda hawt as well, and she sure ain’t no fool…no Big Bad Wolf is gonna pull one over on her. Going through those creepy old woods to Grandma’s house, this Little Red (Mikayla Roberts) fears no evil. So when she reaches Grandma’s house, she whips out her cell phone and places an Amazon order, which miraculously arrives almost instantaneously in time for deployment.

The Big Bad Wolf arrives, too…a magnificent, snarling version in white. But when Red deploys the dog toy that she has purchased, Wolfie becomes a good boy, jumping and playing with the toy in total delight! We’ve seen a similar transformation in such films as The Bad Guys, when Mr. Wolf just can’t help wagging his tail when called a good boy. There’s no such thing as a bad boy, really, right?

The actress playing Grandma isn’t exactly an elderly, bedridden-cripple either, but looks to be a pretty hip and vital lady. Well-played update on an old timeless classic, Amazon!

(tip o’ the pen to carycomic…)

“The Real Cost” TV Spot, “Straw City”

October 25, 2022

The Big Bad Wolf continues to find new life in fresh incarnations, and this minute-long anti-smoking promo, while five years old, may have passed most of us by, and so bears visitation…

The Wolf here is kind of a pathetic figure, living a solitary existence is an apartment with a bare refrigerator. Seeking food, he gets in in his car, guided by his GPS, and goes to Straw City, which is populated by…surprise, pigs!

Now the Wolf used to be a seriously bad dude, you can tell by his leather jacket…but alas, years of smoking have so depleted his lung power that he now is incapable of blowing down their straw dwellings. Initially afraid, the pigs now look at him with a mixture of wonder and almost pity. Old Big Bad ain’t so bad anymore. One pig is so unconcerned that they walk past the Wolf while wearing headphones….

It’s too late for this Wolfie. He extracts a pack of cigarettes as he walks away, self-defeated. So toss the cigarettes…they ain’t no good for you! We preds have to keep our game up, ‘ya know… 🦊

https://youtu.be/9FKaJTV-0T0

Fluzone TV Spot: The Wolf in Sheep’s Clothing…

October 21, 2022

In a Sandofi commercial for Fluzone, the disease is personified as a ravenous wolf stalking people in various settings with ill intent. The notion of “the wolf at the door” is historically a longstanding one often used to represent all kinds of hardships and deprivation, from war to famine to disease.

The attempted predations of the realistic and sizeable wolf depicted here are repeatedly frustrated in this commercial by the simple fact that his intended victims have been immunized. Eventually he becomes a wolf on the run, rendered impotent by the simple fact that the people he surveys and passes have been protected…

And so we finally see our wolf retreating to the extent that he’s looking out the rear window of a bus. I don’t know what fare he was charged, but think that being immunized is a good idea lest you be visited and victimized by the flu wolf…

I’ve had my vaccine this year…have you?

“The Munsters;” Brittle Bones?

October 2, 2022

With October and spooky season here, it’s great to get into a Halloween-related post or two. I have to admit, however, that I was never a great fan of the 1960’s TV sitcom The Munsters, far preferring The Addams Family, which not only survived but thrived in its transition to movies, and brought us Wednesday Addams as a breakout character.

Now Rob Zombie absolutely loved The Munsters, and his film is a labor of love to them, described as a prequel that brings the characters of Herman and Lily together. Herman, a Frankenstein monster clone, is sewn together from body parts that include those of a bad comedian. Lily, a vampire, becomes romantically involved with the big guy much to the dismay of her vampiric father. This all becomes tiresome rather quickly, and the film is criticized as being overly-long and thin on plot.

Endeavoring to make a family-friendly horror movie is a difficult mission, and it tends to ultimately become more irksome than successful. The genres are not readily compatible, and the bright colors used in much of the film are hardly gothic. Filmmaker Rob Zombie is best known for far gorier cinematic fare, and he is rather out of his element here, even if he does love The Munsters. The characters here are all fish out of water, masquerading as everyday citizens whereas they are in reality stock-monster types. This plays better as a brief TV sitcom than it does as an extended movie where it gets wearisome.

From a furry perspective, I do like Lilly’s brother, Lester the Werewolf, portrayed here as an entrepreneurial werewolf who confidently makes really bad business decisions. Lester’s recessive genes are why Eddie Munster is a werewolf rather than a vampire or Frankenstein clone…

At any rate, diehard loyalists may find The Munsters a treat, whereas to many of us the movie is a pointless ordeal. Sometimes, dead television should be allowed to rest in peace…

National Comic Book Day!

September 25, 2022

I would be remiss if I failed to remind you that September 25th is National Comic Book Day! ‘Fess up now…how many of you grew up lingering over the pages of a comic book, and fantasizing about how great your life would be if you had a superpower…like, any one of them!

I had the rare kind of father who would actually bring me home a comic book or Mad Magazine occasionally when he came home from the store with the Sunday paper. It wasn’t just any comic book, either. Nope, it had to be a superhero one! My early years were spent paging through DC comics icons like Superman and The Green Lantern. Later, I would learn of the backstories of more obscure comic heroes like The Phantom and even Mandrake the Magician! “The Phantom is rough on roughnecks,” old jungle saying…

This led me down the rabbit hole in adulthood of discovering even more notable precursors such as The Shadow. When special effects reached a level where superhero movies were better than laughable, we were really off to the races with DC and Marvel characters, some more memorable than others, and renewing or finding new fan bases in the adult population…

And it all started with comic books, so remember this holy day. And I still have my Green Lantern ring, folks, two actually. If only the darn things worked, if only! Well, hope springs eternal, so they say…gotta keep trying! “In brightest day, in blackest night…”

“I’m Looking at a Werewolf,” from Terror in the Woods

September 9, 2022

Terror in the Woods isn’t a bad show, although it’s largely for entertainment value, with documentation sparse and scientific rigor non-existent. The episodes vary from ho-hum to compelling, and if you select the episodes of your viewing carefully, you may find them worthwhile and even compelling to watch…

Season 3, Episode 3 of the series first aired in September 2021, and it’s hard to resist the luring title of one segment, “I’m looking at a (bleeping) werewolf, and it’s trying to kill me!” Well, it turns out that the werewolf in question is kind of the Louisiana bayou variety, which stands about 7′ to 8′ tall, and has larger-than-human-like features with a wolf-like head. Known as a Rougarou, such shape-shifting creatures appear human if sickly in the daytime, reverting to a werewolf form at night with a thirst for blood. ..

Now there are as many ways to become a Rougarou as there are ways to spell it, with methods involving the classic bite to a witch’s spell. The cultural background of the creature is rich and diverse, originating from tales told by French Canadians in Louisiana to keep their kids in line, and out of the woods at night! – – Gotta keep the little buggers scared to get them compliant, ‘ya know!

While Rougarou have some commonalities with both vampires and traditional werewolves, they differ as well. They’re unbothered by silver bullets or religious artifacts, and to kill one usually requires decapitation and preferably burning or severe mutilation of the body.

In the series episode, a young guy hits on a strangely feral girl at the clothing store where he works, booking a date with her that evening. The hours pass but the girl never appears at the appointed site, so the guy plays basketball with other guys at the site for four hours before leaving with them at midnight when the court automatic lights go off. Hearing an unnatural noise behind them, the guys perceive something threatening and inhuman, and attempt to run away. One slips and falls, and the creature is upon him. Seeking to save their comrade, one of the others pulls a .38 from his pack and fires at the beast, because this is ‘Merica, after all! The presumed Rougarou is driven off but not killed, and the narrator of the tale suffers from nightmares thereafter…

So if you’re Louisiana-bound, enjoy some cool jazz and hot Cajun cookin’…but beware of the Rougarou, especially if you unknowingly arrange a date with one!

Pee-wee Herman Turns 70!

September 1, 2022

You tend to either love or hate Paul Reubens as his character Pee-wee Herman, and I have to confess being a fan. His character is a man-child, and falls into that category of people you might call cheerfully demented. Pee-wee is to me an amalgamation of all of the strange kiddy show hosts that I grew up watching, being drawn into their world, and accepting their twisted reality.

Peewee’s Playhouse ran for several years in the 1980’s, and was always a refreshing departure from reality. With his too-small gray suit, red bow tie, and white shoes, Pee-wee helped us navigate his twisted, surreal world of anthropomorphic chairs, pterodactyls, and iconic sidekick stereotypes such as Cowboy Curtis, Captain Carl (a grizzled sea captain), and Miss Yvonne, The Most Beautiful Woman in Puppetland. “We’re all mad here,” as the Cheshire Cat might say...

Paul Reubens is not just a one-trick pony. He has played a number of other roles, including a cameo as a waiter in The Blues Brothers, “The Spleen”in the movie Mystery Men, and the father of Batman villain The Penguin (above). He is scarcely recognizable in the latter role…

As The Spleen (above) in Mystery Men, Paul Reubens’ character had the superpower of, err…powerful flatulence, sufficient to render people unconscious…

So happy 70th birthday, Paul Reubens! And when you hear the Magic Word for the day, remember as Pee-wee reminds us, to scream real loud! 🙀


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