What?!- – Say it ain’t so! Progressive Insurance’s Jamie in cahoots with bank robbers, and ones wearing cat masks, to boot? Well, Jamie is the eternal innocent, and when he signed on to be a wheelman, he didn’t understand that title to mean an escape car driver. Rather, wheelman is an old family name for Jamie..it’s Irish!
So when three cat animal-headed robbers make a hasty exit from the bank, Jamie cheerfully asks them if they’ve gotten their banking done.Unfortunately for the robbers, Jamie’s in no hurry to burn rubber leaving, either.He pulls out slowly, almost immediately stopping at a stop sign where he times the stop by counting 1 Mississippi, 2 Mississippi, etc.Jamie deals with their befuddlement by sharing that he has Progressive’s “Snapshot” feature, which rewards good, but not speedy drivers. These robbers are screwed…
And I guess that you could saythat these were cat burglars. I envy them their masks…
Dean Winters in his Allstate commercials effectively does a remarkable range of impersonations of objects, types of people, and to my interest, animals. In recent memory he has portrayed a raccoon, large breed puppy, bear, and my personal fave, a cat! Remarkably, he channels all of these creatures with little or no makeup, and often while wearing a suit. He doesn’t require a costume or prosthetics, rendering his minimalist but spot-on impressions by posture, actions, and attitude…
…and so equally masterful is Winters’ impression of a wild deer, emerging from a wooded area chewing on a leaf. He comes to a road, musing “What is thisthing?” as he freezes on that surface, because that’s what deer do. Transfixed by the headlights of an approaching car, Winters as deer is thrown up onto the vehicle before landing on the pavement before it, leaving vehicular damage in his wake…
Winters is not a dead deer, however, continuing to address us scuffed up while lying on the road surface. Heck, Mayhem is nigh about indestructible. And if you had Allstate insurance, you might save some bucks, and be saved from Mayhem…like him! 🙀
Drama Queens (and Kings, let’s be honest) are just about everywhere on the internet. You can barely enter a forum without encountering at least one, and they are easy to “trigger.” So it is appropriate that Dramamine has unveiled a spokes-animal that is an actual drama-llama, trying to get Rachel nervous about an upcoming flight…
…walking with her, the drama llama reminds the air traveler that she got nauseous during a previous flight, that the flight may get bumpy, and that she has a middle seat. But when Rachel whips out her box of Dramamine, the llama audibly gasps, stands back as the jet door closes, and tells the passenger that he or she is gonna wait right there!
Although the llama’s voice sounds male, if female would the drama llama be a momma? And at night time, would she be a drama llama in pajamas? Inquiring minds wanna know…
So if you see a drama llama, don’t feed it unless with Dramamine…and don’t confuse a drama lama with an emo alpaca, either… 🦊
This commercial for Mountain Dew blew me away…totally! It’s definitely furry-friendly. Three persons figure in it. A guy is working on his computer in a large office. He stares at his complexion on his monitor, and he is reptilian. A young womanin a diner happens to stare out the window, and sees her reflection as an exotic bird. A third guy is throwing out garbage in an alley, looks up, and sees his image as feline. This furry trio has gotta do the town, and they do!
We see these guys individually and collectively, the reptile viewing his reflection in an elevator glass and the big cat viewing his paw appendages. They go places, too, like a pool hall, making a fine entrance and getting admiring glances. The reptilian is shown performing in some kind of trendy club, playing to a receptive audience. Two of them are shown in an off-road vehicle.There’s no stopping these guys as they make the world their own in their idealized furry forms…
So enjoy…I think that someone out there in commercial-land finally understands the furry experience, and the inner self!And I’d drink a boatload of Mountain Dew if it would transform me… 🦊
Allstate’s “Mayhem” personification Dean Winters is a delight, often playing animal characters in commercials without any attempt made at animal costuming. You only know what he is impersonating because he tells you what he is, and is thinking…and acts the part! Dean Winters has memorably played in Allstate commercials a cat, raccoon, and St. Bernard puppy…
“I’m a bear,” offers Winters, “coming out of hibernation after the best nap of my life. And Papa is HUNGRY!” What, you’ve never seen a bear in a suit before? He comes up through the forest to the partially opened window of an SUV, peering through it in an exploratory fashion…
Without effort, Winters/Bear rips the door off the SUV, going inside in search of food. “And while you’re hitting the trail,” he elaborates, “I’m hitting your cooler!” Foodstuff goes flying out of the vehicle, with Winers happy to find some hot dog rolls…
When he’s done, our well-dressed bear whaps the mirror off the side of the vehicle, just for good measure. Now your insurance may not pay for all of this devastation, so you may wanna get Allstate to be protected from Mayhem, reminds Winters…”Like me!” He roars unconvincinglyas he walks off, his job there done…
Being a mascot therapist must be a highly specialized niche within psychotherapy, and a sweet gig if you can get it. The clients are all quite remarkable, like the green catfish mascot who’s questioning his whole existence, and having anxiety over the fact that NJM has no mascots. “Identity crisis,” writes the therapist dutifully in her note pad…
Prompted to tell her more, the giant catfish comments almost tearfully that he also can’t seem to blink. “I meant more about NJM,” redirects the therapist.– –Ohh, the angst, the suffering here!We hear a muffled wailing sound, and the scene shifts to the waiting room, where we see a penguin and a robot mascot on the couch, awaiting their turn with the doctor. They are all good mascots with their tales of woe, no doubt, but unfortunately NJM doesn’t use mascots. Pity that, because these all look like good mascots…
Now if these fellows can’t find employment as mascots, surely they could fit into the Otherkin community… 🦊
Being kidnapped by a giant rabbit is probably not one of the fears or phobias that you have, but after viewing this commercial, it may become one! These aggressive pursuit-rabbits are physically waylaying people in a variety of settings, carrying or dragging them to the Tubi streaming service rabbit hole, and casting them into it! Think that you’re safe in your car? Think again…the bunnies mob a group of vehicles stopped in traffic, extracting their occupants. They’ll kick your chair out from under you, and drag you by your heels! It’s a curious mix of cuteness meets the unexpectedly terrifying. Yes, there’s a Donnie Darko vibe here, and the rabbits are not especially gentle…
As they are flung down the enormous rabbit-hole (one is kicked) , the victims do not suffer cardiac arrest, but seemingly have expressions of surprised delight on their faces from the many Tubi offerings that they behold during their descent. So much for fear of falling…this may be the last thing that you see…
Not the best known streaming service, Tubi’s intent during their 2023 Super Bowl ads seems to be to make people aware of their existence through a novel device. “Find rabbit holes you didn’t know you were looking for?” You may never see rabbits the same way again… 🙀
For a company that boasts of “no talking animals or irritating jingles,” the NJM insurance company has given us some great ones. And what’s wrong with talking animals, I want to know? Sirs, I am one! 🦊
One of the first great talking animals that NJM has given us was this full-suited narwhal. Now it’s not everyday that you run across someone in a narwhal fursuit, and this fellow has the best intentions…he just wants to audition to be the NJM mascot, and gets zero tolerance. The poor fellow seems to have a flaccid horn…don’t they have a drug now that you can take for that? No wait, that’s the infamous “bent carrot” commercials for Peyronie’s Disease, thanks to which we’ll never see misshaped carrots the same way again…aargh! 😾
Anyways, the NJM receptionist sics laid-back security guard Carl on the poor would-be narwhal mascot to usher him from the building. Wearing a full-body narwhal costume isn’t all peaches and crèam; it’s easy to fall on stairs, for example…
Now Carl the Security Guard played by Scott Watson ordinarily has a boring and uneventful job, except when blue narwhals show up. He is unflappable, and plays the role to deadpan perfection, even in this surreal circumstance. He is the perfect foil to the irrepressible narwhal, ebulliently played by Jared M. Smith.
The narwhal is not easily discouraged or defeated, and in subsequent commercials tries to re-enter the premises, including by vehicle again to be thwarted by Carl. “I’m outta here!,” blusters the narwhal, only to find that his flippers make poor appendages for operating a car…
So catch the delightful rivalry of Narwhal vs. Carl, which to me is vaguely reminiscent of Charlie the Tuna trying to get Starkist to take him in those old commercials. This might be a great live action cartoon…
And now for the first time ever, we bring you the fox-narwhal hybrid. Yes, I think I could get into that character! Please note that my horn isn’t floppy or bent. Everyone sing now: “Fox-narwhals, fox-narwhals, swimming in the ocean, and causing a commotion, because they are so awesome…“
If you’ve ever been to a Chuck E. Cheese place or visited the Orlando, Florida area in times past, you’ve probably had contact with those animatronic animal robot bandsthat may have been high tech at one time, but now are more cornball and laughable than anything else. Liberty Mutual recreates the look and feel of those vintage robot animal bands in their recent commercial, “Catchy Tune.” You see, if a catchy tune can be implanted as an ear worm in your head, perhaps you’ll be more likely to think of the company or product it promotes should you want to buy something as mundane and unexciting as insurance.
What’s more, it appears that this animatronic Squirrel Squad band exists on a miniature stage neatly squirreled away (pun intended) right inside a wall of your very own house, ready to be summoned forth at any time! That would get old in what…a minute or two? You might even say that this Squirrel Squad would drive you nuts! What would be more appropriate, actually?But I kinda like the drummer…and hey, these guys work for peanuts! I demand pizza or some Chinese noms…. 🦊
I find anthropomorphic walruses rather unsettling, although I’ve seen some portly balding dudes with brushy mustaches who rather resembled walruses; think Wilford Brimley! NJM has brought us some rather outstanding anthropomorphic animals in the past, including a standout ferret. He was a winner, whereas this guy is just disturbing…
In the commercial, the lady announces to her walrus dinner-date who symbolizes her former insurance company that she is breaking up with him, and going with NJM, a company that the walrus notes does not even have a mascot. The walrus is disturbed, and leaves in a huff, announcing that he is not then paying for dinner! The lady says that this is fine, as she’s saving moneywith NJM.The walrus waddles off in a huff, leaving us to notice the amazing details in his costume, flippers and all. I just think that the commercial could have gotten more into some walrus behaviors, like having him throw down an entire raw fish for dinner.
It’s important to remember that no actual walruses feelings were hurt in the making of this commercial.- – Goo goo goo joob!
FOXSYLVANIA 
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