Archive for the ‘anthropomorphic’ category

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Tubi’s “Rabbit Hole” Commercial…

February 13, 2023

Being kidnapped by a giant rabbit is probably not one of the fears or phobias that you have, but after viewing this commercial, it may become one! These aggressive pursuit-rabbits are physically waylaying people in a variety of settings, carrying or dragging them to the Tubi streaming service rabbit hole, and casting them into it! Think that you’re safe in your car? Think again…the bunnies mob a group of vehicles stopped in traffic, extracting their occupants. They’ll kick your chair out from under you, and drag you by your heels! It’s a curious mix of cuteness meets the unexpectedly terrifying. Yes, there’s a Donnie Darko vibe here, and the rabbits are not especially gentle…

As they are flung down the enormous rabbit-hole (one is kicked) , the victims do not suffer cardiac arrest, but seemingly have expressions of surprised delight on their faces from the many Tubi offerings that they behold during their descent. So much for fear of falling…this may be the last thing that you see…

Not the best known streaming service, Tubi’s intent during their 2023 Super Bowl ads seems to be to make people aware of their existence through a novel device. “Find rabbit holes you didn’t know you were looking for?” You may never see rabbits the same way again… 🙀


https://youtu.be/GtyxWvifru8

Categories: absurdities, advertising, anthropomorphic, Brilliant but twisted, commercials, furry, furry commercials, television
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Comments: 3 Comments

The NJM Narwhal and Nemesis “Carl…”

January 26, 2023

For a company that boasts of “no talking animals or irritating jingles,” the NJM insurance company has given us some great ones. And what’s wrong with talking animals, I want to know? Sirs, I am one! 🦊

One of the first great talking animals that NJM has given us was this full-suited narwhal. Now it’s not everyday that you run across someone in a narwhal fursuit, and this fellow has the best intentions…he just wants to audition to be the NJM mascot, and gets zero tolerance. The poor fellow seems to have a flaccid horn…don’t they have a drug now that you can take for that? No wait, that’s the infamous “bent carrot” commercials for Peyronie’s Disease, thanks to which we’ll never see misshaped carrots the same way again…aargh! 😾

Anyways, the NJM receptionist sics laid-back security guard Carl on the poor would-be narwhal mascot to usher him from the building. Wearing a full-body narwhal costume isn’t all peaches and crèam; it’s easy to fall on stairs, for example…

Now Carl the Security Guard played by Scott Watson ordinarily has a boring and uneventful job, except when blue narwhals show up. He is unflappable, and plays the role to deadpan perfection, even in this surreal circumstance. He is the perfect foil to the irrepressible narwhal, ebulliently played by Jared M. Smith.

The narwhal is not easily discouraged or defeated, and in subsequent commercials tries to re-enter the premises, including by vehicle again to be thwarted by Carl. “I’m outta here!,” blusters the narwhal, only to find that his flippers make poor appendages for operating a car…

So catch the delightful rivalry of Narwhal vs. Carl, which to me is vaguely reminiscent of Charlie the Tuna trying to get Starkist to take him in those old commercials. This might be a great live action cartoon…

And now for the first time ever, we bring you the fox-narwhal hybrid. Yes, I think I could get into that character! Please note that my horn isn’t floppy or bent. Everyone sing now: “Fox-narwhals, fox-narwhals, swimming in the ocean, and causing a commotion, because they are so awesome…“

Categories: absurdities, advertising, alternative realities, animal spokepersons, anthropomorphic, aquatic, Brilliant but twisted, commercials, furry, furry commercials, humor, television
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Liberty Mutual’s “Catchy Tune…Squirrel Squad”

January 24, 2023

If you’ve ever been to a Chuck E. Cheese place or visited the Orlando, Florida area in times past, you’ve probably had contact with those animatronic animal robot bands that may have been high tech at one time, but now are more cornball and laughable than anything else. Liberty Mutual recreates the look and feel of those vintage robot animal bands in their recent commercial, “Catchy Tune.” You see, if a catchy tune can be implanted as an ear worm in your head, perhaps you’ll be more likely to think of the company or product it promotes should you want to buy something as mundane and unexciting as insurance.

What’s more, it appears that this animatronic Squirrel Squad band exists on a miniature stage neatly squirreled away (pun intended) right inside a wall of your very own house, ready to be summoned forth at any time! That would get old in what…a minute or two? You might even say that this Squirrel Squad would drive you nuts! What would be more appropriate, actually? But I kinda like the drummer…and hey, these guys work for peanuts! I demand pizza or some Chinese noms…. 🦊



(What?…I’ve played a few gigs…)

Categories: absurdities, advertising, alternative realities, anthropomorphic, commercials, furry, furry commercials, television
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Comments: 4 Comments

NJM’s “The Breakup” Walrus…

January 16, 2023

I find anthropomorphic walruses rather unsettling, although I’ve seen some portly balding dudes with brushy mustaches who rather resembled walruses; think Wilford Brimley! NJM has brought us some rather outstanding anthropomorphic animals in the past, including a standout ferret. He was a winner, whereas this guy is just disturbing…

In the commercial, the lady announces to her walrus dinner-date who symbolizes her former insurance company that she is breaking up with him, and going with NJM, a company that the walrus notes does not even have a mascot. The walrus is disturbed, and leaves in a huff, announcing that he is not then paying for dinner! The lady says that this is fine, as she’s saving money with NJM. The walrus waddles off in a huff, leaving us to notice the amazing details in his costume, flippers and all. I just think that the commercial could have gotten more into some walrus behaviors, like having him throw down an entire raw fish for dinner.

It’s important to remember that no actual walruses feelings were hurt in the making of this commercial.- – Goo goo goo joob!

Categories: absurdities, advertising, alternative realities, animal spokepersons, anthropomorphic, Brilliant but twisted, commercials, furry, furry commercials, television
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Comments: 6 Comments

Shape-shifting in ‘Toons, Circa 1930…

January 4, 2023

It’s easy to think that the notion of shape-shifting from human to animal or animal to human form is a relatively modern notion, whereas references to it can be found dating across cultures from hundreds to thousands of years ago. To limit our discussion of shape-shifting, we’re just going to consider one early example of it occurring in the cartoon world…

Now the character of Betty Boop began as kind of an anthropomorphic French poodle who first appeared in Dizzy Dishes crafted by animation pioneer Max Fleisher. She was the girlfriend of Bimbo, a mischievous, trouble-making dog (below)…

Yes, I still like this guy, echoes of whom reverberated in 1960’s counter-culture cartoon art such as that created by Robert Crumb and others. Yet it was Betty who the viewing public latched onto, and within a year, her long dog ears had morphed into earrings, and her black dog nose had become tiny and human. Moreover, the evolved Betty was hawt, a caricature of a 1920’s flapper girl, and…gasp…a sexual woman!

Consider how female cartoon characters were commonly portrayed at the time, for example, Disney’s Minnie Mouse. It’s hard to imagine anyone being turned on by Minnie, including Mickey. But Betty had it all going on, although her features were described as neotenous, with the enlarged head, big eyes, and small limbs reminiscent of those of an infant or young child. Betty’s catch phrase of Boop-oop-a-doop was also evocative of infantile “baby talk.” So hot was Betty that she had to be toned down a bit for the general viewing audience that included children…

It must last be considered who was the real life model in styling for the cartoon character of Betty Boop. While several people have claimed credit for that honor and even litigated for the recognition, credit should actually be given to an African-American woman by the name of “Baby” Esther Jones, who died in 1984, and was an accomplished singer and dancer in Harlem…

So to paraphrase an old ditty, “Don’t worry if you work hard, and your rewards are few. Remember that Betty Boop was once a dog like you!”

Categories: alternative realities, anthropomorphic, cartoons, furry, furry art, retro cool
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Comments: 2 Comments

“Bambi: The Reckoning“ Is Coming!

December 7, 2022

I have to admit that I am not a great fan of hunting. Perhaps that’s because hunters consider those of my kind varmints, and perhaps it’s because I abhor seeing the spectacle of lifeless deer strapped to cars during hunting season in my state. We all know what hunters did to Bambi’s mother. And I say that payback time is hell…

I have a personal history with the Disney movie, Bambi. It was the first movie that my mother took me to. Think of it, I was five years old, and my own mother takes me to see a stag flick! Is it any wonder that I would grow up to be a furry? But enough of my childhood trauma. With a number of beloved childhood classics now falling into the public domain, they are now subject to revisionist treatment, and what’s coming out is either darkly hilarious or simply horrific, depending on your perspectives.

And so from the folks who brought you Winnie the Pooh: Blood and Honey, we have upcoming Bambi: The Reckoning! Let the hooves fall where they may, I guess…

Forget the 1942 Disney film with its tale of loss, life, and love..this is an extremely dark retelling of the original 1928 story, with Bambi retooled as a vicious killing machine on rabies. Yes, I…CAN…DIG IT!!!

Now the source material of the Bambi character is a 1928 novel by Felix Salten innocently named Bambi, A Life in the Woods. The original story passed into the public domain in 2022, and so is fair game for a horror movie treatment. The 1942 Disney version is not. Film maker Scott Jeffrey will not be allowed to use any of Disney’s character design for Bambi, but is rather drawing inspiration from a Netflix production called, The Ritual. In it, we will see Bambi’s transformation into a revenge-driven nightmare following the slaughter of his mother by hunters. One can hardly blame the guy…

Production begins in January of 2023, so no trailers are currently available, and all we have is a hint of the new character design. I, for one, will cheer on the exploits of this Rambuck. So bust ‘em up, Bambi! Let the games begin… 🦊

One can hardly do better, however, than this SNL visitation of the same theme. Enjoy!

Categories: alternative realities, anthropomorphic, Brilliant but twisted, fantasy, furry, furry movies, movies
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Comments: 8 Comments

“The Mean One” Grinch Horror Parody…

December 2, 2022

If you’re tired of annually getting Xmas drummed into you from late October through New Year’s, you just might be in the right mood to appreciate The Mean One, a parody of Dr. Seuss’ How The Grinch Stole Xmas. Tag line: “First he stole Xmas…now he’s back for BLOOD!”

Forget the Grinch being redeemed, this is the Dark Grinch, or as Stephen King might say it, “Full dark, no stars.” This is Krampus as opposed to St. Nicholas, the Grinch as horror movie Xmas slasher.

Forget Scrooge, who got all soft and wimped out on us. This Grinch means business. It seems that he killed little Cindy Lou-Hoo’s mother during the daughter’s encounter with him, and now twenty years later, she’s back like Sarah Conner after the Terminator with an accompanying skill set..

The Grinch always did seem to have horror star potential, but hey, as Kermit the Frog famously noted, “It isn’t easy being green.” There are leavening notes of dark humor in the premise and available trailer footage, because after all this is a parody and satirical in nature. Memorable lines by Cindy Lou-Hoo; “It’s time to roast this beast!,” and “You’re a dead one, Mr. Grinch!”

Just color me green with envy for this dark Grinch, with battle scenes against Santa figures reminiscent of Shapeshifters Anonymous! Cindy’s weaponry includes an illuminated Walking Dead “Negan-esque” bat, and some kind of wonderful candy cane shotgun. So let’s all go on a slay-ride, everyone! 🦊

Categories: absurdities, anomalies, anthropomorphic, Brilliant but twisted, furry, furry horror, holidays, horror, movies
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Comments: 5 Comments

“Break Free” VW Tiguan Commercial…

November 22, 2022

As the movie Lamb showed us, sheep have been, well, shorn of proper respect and attention in the animal kingdom. They have untapped potential as pets and child-surrogates. This is brought to our attention in a recent commercial for Volkswagen’s Tiguan.

So what happens when you allow a wayward sheep into your VW Tiguan, and take him home with you? Well, he or she becomes much like a dog, hanging out the vehicle’s window, and making themselves at home in your home, demanding walks, drinking from the toilet, making a mess when you’re away, and adorably taking a bath while bleating.—Ahh, the many joys of pet-parenting!

Life gets bigger, you see, when you break from the herd. So “make your own kind of music.” Who am I to judge? Just don’t call your new ovine pet Lambchop. They might get the wrong idea…🐑

And a Happy Thanksgiving, y’all! 🦊





Categories: absurdities, advertising, alternative realities, animals, anthropomorphic, Brilliant but twisted, commercials, furry, furry commercials, television
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“The Real Cost” TV Spot, “Straw City”

October 25, 2022

The Big Bad Wolf continues to find new life in fresh incarnations, and this minute-long anti-smoking promo, while five years old, may have passed most of us by, and so bears visitation…

The Wolf here is kind of a pathetic figure, living a solitary existence is an apartment with a bare refrigerator. Seeking food, he gets in in his car, guided by his GPS, and goes to Straw City, which is populated by…surprise, pigs!

Now the Wolf used to be a seriously bad dude, you can tell by his leather jacket…but alas, years of smoking have so depleted his lung power that he now is incapable of blowing down their straw dwellings. Initially afraid, the pigs now look at him with a mixture of wonder and almost pity. Old Big Bad ain’t so bad anymore. One pig is so unconcerned that they walk past the Wolf while wearing headphones….

It’s too late for this Wolfie. He extracts a pack of cigarettes as he walks away, self-defeated. So toss the cigarettes…they ain’t no good for you! We preds have to keep our game up, ‘ya know… 🦊

https://youtu.be/9FKaJTV-0T0

Categories: advertising, alternative realities, animals, anthropomorphic, commercials, furry
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Comments: 3 Comments

Fluzone TV Spot: The Wolf in Sheep’s Clothing…

October 21, 2022

In a Sandofi commercial for Fluzone, the disease is personified as a ravenous wolf stalking people in various settings with ill intent. The notion of “the wolf at the door” is historically a longstanding one often used to represent all kinds of hardships and deprivation, from war to famine to disease.

The attempted predations of the realistic and sizeable wolf depicted here are repeatedly frustrated in this commercial by the simple fact that his intended victims have been immunized. Eventually he becomes a wolf on the run, rendered impotent by the simple fact that the people he surveys and passes have been protected…

And so we finally see our wolf retreating to the extent that he’s looking out the rear window of a bus. I don’t know what fare he was charged, but think that being immunized is a good idea lest you be visited and victimized by the flu wolf…

I’ve had my vaccine this year…have you?

Categories: advertising, animal presence, anthropomorphic, commercials, furry, furry commercials, television
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Comments: 6 Comments

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