Perry Shoots Less-Than-Wily Coyote…

Posted September 3, 2011 by vulpesffb
Categories: animal occurrences, animals, furry
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 – – Republican presidential aspirant Rick Perry, described by another Texas Republican as being “…like Bush only without the brains,” recently drew attention for reportedly shooting a coyote dead that he felt menaced his daughter’s Labrador while he was jogging on a trail near Austin.

Now Perry claims that he always carries his .380 Ruger handgun in undeveloped areas because he’s afraid of snakes,  and felt that either he or the dog were in imminent danger from the coyote, so the governor plugged him.  It should be noted that the governor was without his security detail at the time, so the incident or the degree of threat posed can’t be substantiated.  Coyotes usually, however, are wary predators that shun human contact, and when some Austin locals protested that Perry’s reaction was excessive and dangerous, Perry shrugged it off.   “Don’t attack my dog,” Perry said, “or you might get shot – if you’re a coyote.”

Dunno about this Perry, but I’d vote for Perry the Platypus…and had the coyote been Wile E., properly supplied and supported by Acme, the incident might have had a very different outcome…

Comments: 4 Comments

“Cloverfield” Sequel?

Posted September 1, 2011 by vulpesffb
Categories: aliens, creature features, movies
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 – – Whether and when there will be a sequel to the 2008 sci-fi movie Cloverfield is a topic of wild speculation, with no clear answer to either question at present.  I loved the original, although it took several viewings for the film to really grow on me.  Some good movies have had some disappointing or bad sequels, and I would hope that if a sequel is made, it would be worthy of its predecessor without that original essentially being re-made.  Clearly, the “hooks” are there on which a sequel could be mounted, most notably the creature’s apparent survival of even nuclear attack.   Speculations from the fandom have included a film made from the military’s perspective, a prequel, or even a film from the monster’s perspective! 

I am guardedly hopeful that a sequel will eventually be made, although probably not in the near future.   Director Matt Reeves and producer J.J. Abrams have had a variety of other projects, although interest reportedly still exists in eventually returning to the Cloverfield universe…

Comments: 1 Comment

The Big Yellow Rabbit…

Posted August 30, 2011 by vulpesffb
Categories: absurdities, animals, Brilliant but twisted, cool things, furry art
Tags: ,

  – – Someday, we may awaken to find our streets taken over by gigantic plushies, such as this 13-meter-high yellow bunny crafted by Dutch artist Florintijn Hofman in Orebro, Sweden.  Although he looks like he’s had a less than favorable encounter with the Cloverfield monster, the Big Yellow Bunny is part of the openART festival in Orebro, where the art is in town, and you can walk around it!  “Open Art” may not sit well as a concept with those who regard art as something to be possessed and hung on the wall…

…the Big Yellow Bunny questions the purpose of the public space, and changes the perspective of the monuments within.  One can also imagine the even more enormous child owner of the bunny coming to claim it in a Twilight Zone type scenario!   The work will be for sale, should you want a 13-meter yellow rabbit.- -Perhaps we could set up a steel cage wrasslin’ match for the BYB with Clifford, the Big Red Dog, or the 16-foot high pink and white wrecking ball bunny featured in an H & R Block commercial in the past; it’s all good…

Hah! – – And to think that they said art was dead!

Comments: 2 Comments

Geico’s Animal Eighties Artists…

Posted August 28, 2011 by vulpesffb
Categories: absurdities, anthropomorphic, Brilliant but twisted, feathered friends, furry, furry commercials, music, television
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 – – Eighties music played by a dog and a bird?- -Sure, why not!  Mr. Butters the dog seems to know his way around the keyboard, but the cockatoo seems a little pitchy on the vocals.  It’s just a Geico commercial, and it’s unlikely that this version of  “Take On Me” will win on American Idol…

Comments: 2 Comments

Did National Zoo Animals Anticipate Earthquake?

Posted August 26, 2011 by vulpesffb
Categories: animal behavior, animals, furry
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 – – While Washington’s humans continued to yammer into their cell phones prior to the August 23rd earthquake, those of the furry persuasion at the National Zoo may have known what was coming.  Zoo staff reported that before the 5.8 magnitude earthquake hit, lemurs were seen to have sounded an alarm, apes abandoned their food, flamingos rushed into a huddle, and a gorilla let out a shriek.  Even ducks and beavers interrupted feeding and other activities to jump into  water.  The zoo’s giant pandas, however, did not appear to respond to the earthquake.

Similar agitated behaviors have long been reported from captive animal populations prior to earthquakes elsewhere…

Comments: 4 Comments

Mystery Roadkill!

Posted August 24, 2011 by vulpesffb
Categories: animals, anomalies, mysteries, unexplained, unidentified
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 – – I, for one, can never get enough of mystery roadkill!  One such dead white mammal was found on a Douglas County road in Minnesota that boasts five claws, dark tufts of hair on its back and head, and long toenails.- -Well actually, it’s not boasting anything, such being one of the limitations of being dead…

While the head suggests a canine, the right front leg appears to have five toes, which is not typical for canines.  The long toenails are also not typical for an active canine.  While the creature is similar to a badger, the tail is much longer than usual for such.  Other guesses about the identity of the mystery carcass have ranged from a skunk to a wolverine to a wolf or, of course, the mythical chupacabra!   The usual rumors are also flying about secret government testing, without which I wouldn’t be here.

…while the Minnesota Department of Natural Resources has been unable to conclusively identify the carcass,  further testing is planned.  Meanwhile, guinea hens and cats in the area are missing, and burrowed holes from four to ten inches in size were spotted near where the animal was found.  The best guess on the identity of the deceased at this point is that it’s a badger with mange…or is it?!   Dramatic Fox

Comments: 4 Comments

DirecTV’s Giant Panda

Posted August 22, 2011 by vulpesffb
Categories: absurdities, furry, television
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 – – DirecTV has a new commercial featuring Vietnamese comedian Dat Phan, who plays a character called “Whale,” so named because he’s a “big boy in the casino.”  Everything that Whale does is “crazy big,” so he hangs out with tall caucasian models and a huge panda called Coco, who eats a bamboo stick while Whale watches Rango on television!

…the commercial, however, has been found offensive by some in the Asian American community due to its playing off Asian stereotypes such as Dat Phan’s forced accent and short stature, a giant Koi fish, and the enormous panda who eats bamboo.  DirecTV had earlier reaped ire for a commercial which played off black stereotypes…

…as for me, I’d love to sit with a gigantic panda and watch animation!


Comments: 2 Comments

Allstate’s “Raccoon Mayhem” Rocks!

Posted August 19, 2011 by vulpesffb
Categories: animals, anthropomorphic, Brilliant but twisted, furry, television
Tags: ,

 – – The Allstate “Mayhem” guy (Dean Winters) in this commercial is representing a raccoon, and every expense has been spared in his raccoon impersonation;  he’s clearly human, he’s wearing a suit, and the only nod to his status as a raccoon are dark circles around his eyes!  You could make yourself look more like a raccoon with a little construction paper…

The acting, however, is another matter; the Mayhem man says, “I’m a raccoon, and this time in your attic has been the best week of my raccoon life!”  He then proceeds to jubilantly demonstrate the things that raccoons can do in an attic, like playing havoc with the electrical wiring, throwing around the insulation, scratching the rafters,  and chewing a hole in the roof, through which we are shown Winters as ‘coon protruding.  “I’m the smartest raccoon I know!,” brags Winters in character, adding that he’s already had “like four babies.”  When Winters walks away from the house at the end of the commercial, he looks like Heath Ledger’s Joker in The Dark Knight walking away from the hospital before it blows…this should further solidify the raccoon rep as bad boys of the furry community!

The dark humor of Raccoon Mayhem is little less than brilliant!

Comments: 3 Comments

Fugitive Cow…

Posted August 17, 2011 by vulpesffb
Categories: animal rights, animals, furry, furry causes, furry heroes, strange happenings
Tags: , ,

 – – I’ve always felt empathy for fugitive cows, those bovines that feel the bloodline of the aurochs stir in them, and so do not go quietly to the slaughter… 

…and so to Yvonne, the six-year-old German cow, I say, You go, girl!  No milk dud, Yvonne escaped in May from a farm in Muehldorf, Germany where she was being prepared for the slaughter.  She made a new home for herself in the Bavarian woods, gaining the notice of authorities when Yvonne jumped in front of German police cars.  Deemed a traffic threat, hunters were then authorized to shoot the cow, which outraged animal rights activists.  An Austrian animal protection group then either offered or has already bought Yvonne from her original farm for 700 euros. 

While receiving much attention, Yvonne remained on the lam, prompting efforts to lure her in by sending bovine family members and friends into the wild.  A bull was even brought in by animal rights activists in an effort to romance the cow, but the bull turned out to be castrated, and Yvonne wasn’t fooled by this flimsy deception.  Things got weirder still when an animal psychic was consulted by the animal rights activists.  The psychic reported having contacted the cow by telepathy, saying that Yvonne was fine but didn’t feel ready to come out of hiding, fearing that the humans would lock her up and that she’d lose her freedom!

Meanwhile, the Hindu community recently issued a statement calling for German authorities to withdraw permission for hunters to shoot Yvonne, saying that the decision was ill-advised.  A German newspaper has also created a Facebook page, and offered a reward of over $14,000 to anyone who can capture Yvonne…

…my sympathies are on the side of the cow on the run, who has probably connected with the underground and awaits the furry revolution…long life and good fortune to you, counter-culture bovine!- -Fight the power, Yvonne!

Comments: 3 Comments

Real Roadrunners…

Posted August 14, 2011 by vulpesffb
Categories: animal behavior, animals, feathered friends
Tags: ,

 – – I love the Warner Bros. Roadrunner cartoons as much as anyone, although I venerate the coyote and like the roadrunner, and if involved would probably negotiate, and try to find Wile E. something else to eat that he might be happy with, maybe order him up a pizza and share a slice with him, canine-to-canine.   In reality, however, roadrunners are not tall, skinny birds that can travel in a blur of motion, make “meep-meep” sounds, and defeat Acme-supplied coyote geniuses. 

They are, however, tough and resourceful birds who are more likely to be doing the murdering than running from would-be murderers.  They are almost exclusively carnivorous, and will eat rattlesnakes, sinking their beaks into the snake and repeatedly smashing it into the ground until the snake is both dead and tenderized in a technique aptly named, the Centrifugal Slam; the snake is then swallowed whole, bit by bit!   Roadrunners will also eat tarantula hawks (an insect), horned lizards, and other birds…all in all, a bird who would rather fight than flee!

Just a reminder that cartoons are rarely accurate sources for aspiring ornithologists or zoologists, and an animal’s lethality should not be judged by its appearance!

Comments: 3 Comments

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