FOXSYLVANIA

– – It may come as a shock to hear that animals have been used as test subjects for Tasers to determine if being subjected to the stun guns can lead to ventricular fibrillation, a highly abnormal heart rhythm that can become fatal.  In a bizarre experiment, sixteen sheep were anesthetized, administered methamphetamine, and then given repeated shocks with Tasers to simulate what might happen when drug-addled humans were hit with the stun guns!   Some of the smaller sheep suffered elevated heart rates, but none experienced a potentially lethal heart condition.   “It’s not so baaad,” commented one sheep of his Taser experience.

Taser experiments have also been conducted on anesthetized dogs as well on on conscious pigs, surgically modified pigs, and pigs under the influence of cocaine! Neither the knocked-out dogs nor the conscious pigs suffered ventricular fibrillation, whereas the pigs surgically modified to remove the thick skin around their hearts did suffer near heart failure when the Taser’s barb was placed less than an inch away from their hearts. The coked-up pigs actually had their safety margin increased by 50 to 100 percent!  (“Hit me again, dude,  far out!”)

A Taser was also successfully used in the field on a cow moose in Alaska who refused to leave a construction site where her calves were trapped.   Research has gone on for five years studying the effects of Tasers on captive moose and bears, and Taser International is seeking to develop a wildlife-specific stun gun;  just don’t tase me, bro!   Wildly unauthorized field tests have also been conducted on bears and bulls as well as on more dogs and sheep…whole lotta shockin’ goin’ on…

…and by the way, the name “Taser” was originally an acronym for “Thomas A. Swift’s Electric Rifle…”