Archive for June 2010

Adopt a Simian Celebrity?

June 30, 2010

– – We’ve referred here before to Bubbles the Chimp, pet of the late Michael Jackson who in the 1980’s tripped the light fantastic, going to parties at Elizabeth Taylor’s house, having tea with the mayor of Osaka, Japan, and even sharing matching outfits with Michael.  Then Bubbles got too big to be kept as a pet, and he went to the Center for Great Apes in Wauchula, Florida.

Now age 26 and currently weighing in at around 180 lbs., Bubbles is part of a group of seven chimps that spend their time climbing, playing, grooming and tickling one another, and sharing food.  His best bud is a 19-year-old male chimp.  As it costs $15,000 a year to maintain Bubbles,  the animal sanctuary where he resides is asking people to adopt Bubbles for $150 a year.   Although chimps live to be about 60 years of age, they usually only work in animal entertainment until the age of six, after which time they become too large and strong to be safely maintained in human company.   Zoos characteristically don’t take animals like Bubbles, who was raised by humans and doesn’t know chimpanzee rules…

Doggie Dreams…

June 28, 2010

– – Those of us who share life with dogs and cats commonly observe their paws twitching as they slumber; other clues of pet dreams include whisker movement,  irregular breathing, and yelping in canines.  Just as humans recall experiences while dreaming, pets are thought to do the same things due to structural similarities in the mammalian hippocampus, a part of the brain involved in memory. Pets also go through multiple sleep stages, from slow wave sleep to rapid eye movement stages, where most dreaming occurs.   Electrodes have documented REM episodes even in sleeping rats.

Growing evidence and documentation that animals dream challenges the notion that animals are reflex machines operating by instinct alone.  Darwin contended that if you can prove that an animal dreams, then you can prove that consciousness exists there as a dream is a conscious image.

All of which is something many of us have known for a long time!

Really Bad Luck…

June 26, 2010

– – If not for bad luck, some people wouldn’t have any luck at all.  Consider the case of a guy in Raleigh, North Carolina who earlier this month was mauled by a black bear in his front yard, ending up with a deep gouge in his wrist…

…bad luck, right?–But as a topper, the same guy was struck by lightning  four years ago!  Now the odds of being attacked by a bear and surviving in any given year are one in 28 million, while the odds of being struck by lightning in a year and surviving are one in 1.213 million.  The odds of being both struck by lightning and mauled by a bear and surviving both in a four year span of time are 1 in 372 trillion!  Now some would say that such a person is either doomed to suffer more or is due for good luck, but such belief is what is called a gambler’s fallacy, and has no place in statistics;  one event has no bearing on the other.

And did I forget to  mention?- -The gentleman afflicted by both events is a minister, who may be seen as extremely unlucky or cursed for what happened to him, or lucky and perhaps blessed because he survived both.   It’s all a matter of perspective, really…



Chicks and Jaguars Dig It!

June 24, 2010

– – How do you lure a jaguar?–Well, they seem to really like Calvin Klein’s Obsession for Men.  It also seems to work well for other big cats like cheetahs.

No kidding!  An experiment by the Bronx Zoo in New York found that Obsession for Men drew jaguars for longer than other scents.  The practice made its way down to Guatemala, where biologists report similar success in observing and tracking jaguars in Guatemala’s Maya Biosphere Reserve.  The use of the cologne in conservation programs will be expanded to other Central and South American countries.


I hear, however, that cougars are lured by younger males…


Basil Brush, Superstar!

June 22, 2010

– – Kids these days would probably roll their eyes at the notion of being entertained by a hand puppet, but in the days of yore young ‘uns were entertained by such as this and worse…

Combine a star who’s a hand puppet with British television and humor and you have Basil Brush, a fictional fox character who may be a glove puppet yet grows on you (like a glove), and can be hilariously entertaining. Created in 1963 as a children’s show character, Basil has evolved but always been portrayed as a well-spoken fox who can be appreciated on a variety of levels. A puppet who claims to dislike puppets, Basil’s most prized possession is his “brush,” the traditional name for a fox’s tail (for which we are rightfully known).

In more current incarnations, Basil has been depicted as having a family that is every bit as dysfunctional as many of our own. With his “Boom!-Boom!” catchphrase, I ‘d be proud to call Basil my foxy friend…



Blond Bigfoot?

June 20, 2010

– – A North Carolina man residing on a mountain in Casar reports having repeatedly encountered a ten-foot-tall yellow haired bigfoot with six fingers on his property.  The beast is reported to have looked like a giant ape with a man’s face, and it made whistling sounds.  It approached the man’s dogs and somehow became wrapped up in their chains, at which point the man poked the animal with a stick and rough-talked the creature before it left his property; no one likes trash talk, after all.   The man actually called 911 to ask if there would be a problem if he later found it necessary to shoot the beast!   As often occurs in such cases, there is no physical evidence or video/photograph of the reported cryptid.

The incident is not without area precedent, however.   In the 1970’s an unknown creature dubbed “Knobby” was often spotted in the same rural area, and was held responsible for killing chickens and other animals…


Animal Freedom Day

June 18, 2010

– – The world’s first online Animal Freedom Day is scheduled for July 24th, with a goal to create awareness and put an end to the slaughtering of animals and animal abuse, and promote creation of an alternative food source. Many high-profile celebrities, environmentalists, and politicians together with animal rights organizations will take part.

Promoted as a multi-venue music festival that will be streamed live for everyone to see, Animal Freedom Day will feature many performances from independent music artists to legendary music icons. It will be webcast live from the Burlington Jazz’n Blues Festival.

Ferret Legging…

June 16, 2010

– – We have learned from comedian Steve Martin about a sport called cat juggling, but did you know of another obscure but real sport called ferret legging?

Not for those who do not tolerate claws and sharp teeth near their, err, private parts, ferret legging involves having male-only contestants put live ferrets inside their trousers.  The winner is the one who is the last to release the animals.- – I swear that I am not making this up!  By the way, the world record for the event is an astonishing  five hours and thirty minutes!

It is speculated that the sport may have originated during a time when only the relatively wealthy in England were allowed to keep animals used for hunting, forcing poachers to hide their illicit ferrets in their trousers.  In the sport, competitors can’t be drunk or drugged, nor can the ferrets be sedated, muzzled,  or lacking a full set of teeth.   Trousers are tied at the ankles and belts are securely  fastened at the waist to prevent the ferrets from escaping; contestants do not wear protective devices or even underwear!  Two ferrets are then placed inside, and the competitor then stands in front of the judges for as long as they can…competitors can attempt to dislodge the ferrets from the groin area from outside of their trousers, although this can be difficult…and  yes, competitors are bitten and bloodied…one champion took to wearing white trousers so as to better manifest the blood!  Most males reading of this for the first time are by now probably either incredulous or squirming uncomfortably!

The sport has been practiced for centuries, but enjoyed a brief resurgence in the 1970’s.  Although described as a “dying sport” (we need not explain why), a national ferret legging event has been held in Richmond, Virginia every year since 2003…and participants can honestly respond in the affirmative when asked if they have a ferret in their pants!

(shudders)- – A sport I’ll never compete in, thank you!

Crying “Fowl!”

June 14, 2010

– – Be careful if you’re protesting in Singapore in front of a business,  especially if you’re wearing a chicken suit!

Police in Singapore are really tough on protesters, you see, with protests only allowed at a designated public park located on the fringe of the business district…so when a vegetarian PETA protester arrived outside of a KFC restaurant to decry allegedly cruel practices against chickens,  the protester was whisked away in a police car, and put  under functional house arrest.  His bags and his chicken suit were confiscated!

“…what I went through is nothing compared to (the treatment of) the chickens,” the protester was quoted as saying.


Buffaloed!

June 12, 2010

– -True Story! A man in the Florida Keys had to call 911 when a stuffed water buffalo’s head mounted on a wall fell on him and pinned him as he slept in a reclining chair!  The man had apparently woken up when the buffalo head fell on his lap.  Although the head was too heavy for him to lift, the man was able to reach for his cell phone and call for help.  The man could only yell his address and tell operators that he had been trapped.

(- -I love to see mounted animal heads take their revenge, don’t you?!)