–A baby humpback whale estimated to be about one to two months old evidently mistook a 36-foot yacht for its mother! The young whale swam around the sailboat several times off Australia, nuzzling it and attempting to suckle. The boat eventually lured the baby whale back to open water…poor confused kid!
Archive for August 2008
Whale Mistakes Boat for Mother!
August 18, 2008Aquaman?
August 16, 2008
–Olympian swimmer Michael Phelps has so far won seven gold medals, tying the record of Mark Spitz and being referred to in some circles as Aquaman…
…well, can Michael Phelps summon whales or communicate telepathetically with fish like Aquaman could?–Can he throw balls of water that impact with powerful concussive force?–Does he have a pet octopus or did he lose his hand?–I think NOT! —Hail Atlantis! 😉
The Georgia Ape
August 16, 2008
–Well, the Montauk Monster’s missing, but we’ve got the Chupacabra video, and supposedly a dead Bigfoot.–Not bad times for cryptozoology or hucksterism, depending on what you believe!
Reporters were not impressed by the Bigfoot presentation of the two men claiming that it was the genuine article, as they did not produce a body nor disclose its location. One of the two was also involved in a previous Bigfoot hoax in 2005, when he was going to do a “Pay-Per-View” thing. They did produce a picture, which looked like a Chewbacca costume with a few guts sprinkled on for good measure. Of three DNA samples produced, one was human, the second possum, and the third untestable. Without rigorous and independent scientific investigation, conclusions will be tainted at best.
This will take months to spin out, but I would look for the claims to start to unravel. I’d be thrilled, however, if this was the real deal…but DNA samples may prove that this was the offspring of John Edwards...
Bigfoot Found?
August 14, 2008
–This could be major, or just another hoax. Two Georgia residents who lead bigfoot-tracking expeditions are claiming to have found the body of a bigfoot in the woods of northern Georgia. The men, one a police officer and the other a former correctional officer, claim they have a body, photos, and DNA evidence of the 7-feet tall, 500 lb. mammal. On August 15th, the men will reveal their findings at a news conference in Palo Alto, where they intend to present DNA evidence that will prove that the carcass is that of a bigfoot. The creature has a 16-3/4 inch footprint and a palm to fingertip span of 11-1/2 inches. The presenters are not stating where the body was found or where it is now.
Will this be the find of a lifetime, or just another disappointment?–I want to believe!
The Minnow Rides Again!
August 13, 2008
–Remember Gilligan’s Island, the old sitcom so bad that it was good?–“Seven passengers set sail that day on a three-hour tour?”–Well, the ill-fated boat The Minnow from that show has been restored by a new owner, and will again be offering three-hour tours in Canada.
It has long been debated which character was hotter on that show, Ginger the movie star or Mary Ann, the girl next door. For me, it was two paws up for Mary Ann.– And let us not forget the Professor, who could make a radio from coconuts, but not fix a hole in the boat’s hull! The Professor was a good-looking dude in his day...
Chupcabra Video?
August 12, 2008
–Another Chupacabra video has recently surfaced, this one supposedly made by a sheriff’s deputy. Most of the alleged Chupacabra videos and pictures viewable so far on the internet are either so out of focus as to be anything, or they are laughable fakes. Something may yet come of the roadkill specimen preserved in a freezer in Cuero, Texas. I saw a brief snippet of the video on the news in which I only saw the life form from the rear as it retreated; definitely a canid. Some say that the creature is a gray fox with a bad case of mange, or a strange coyote…
…if the “strange coyote” is equipped with an assortment of Acme products, we’ll probably be seeing more of him… 😉
Python in Your Pants?
August 9, 2008
–Is that a giant Burmese python in your pants, or are you just glad to see me? –Well, it was a giant python, and it did enter the pants of a meteorologist doing a broadcast at the Des Moines Iowa state fair. The python was originally placed on the weatherman’s shoulders, but of course didn’t stay there, crawling at first to the man’s head and giving him a “kiss,” then entering one leg of the guy’s shorts and exiting the other. The broadcast was cut off as the snake was, err, extracted…
New England Vampires
August 7, 2008
—MonsterQuest reports that New England, in addition to giving us the Salem witchcraft trials and the Kennedys, also had quite a vampire scare in the 18th and 19th centuries. Some of those suspected of being vampires even had their mortal remains dug up and mutilated, as in the case presented of J.B., whose femurs (thighbones) were crossed in an “X” over his chest in addition to having his head removed from his spinal column and his ribs broken. This was all in an effort to break the supposed “grasp of the vampire,” their alledged curse upon and conversion of the living. Many of the poor souls thought to be vampires in actuality had “consumption,” which we now refer to as tuberculosis. In the late stages of that highly infectious disease, blood would be coughed up and appear on the lips, leading to speculations of blood-drinking.
The show also presented many other aspects of vampirism, including a discussion on the so-called “psychic vampires,” who supposedly don’t drink blood but rather feed off life and psychic energies. I, for one, can vouch that being in the presence of some individuals leaves me feeling utterly drained…
But as for me, give me a good ole werewolf over a vampire anyday!
Deep Philosophical Furry Questions…
August 6, 2008
–There are great imponderable furry questions, such as who would win a race between Speedy Gonzales and the Road Runner?–The answer to that one is moot, since Speedy Gonzales would these days be judged politically incorrect, and possibly deported to Mexico as an illegal alien. The question that we consider here is who would win a fight between Dracula and a Werewolf.
My speculation is that it would be a Battle Royale, worthy of respectful review and analysis for decades to come. I believe, however, that The Werewolf would prevail. For a visual portrayal of just such a battle, I recommend the under-rated movie Van Helsing with Hugh Jackman (“Wolverine”) in the title role and also portraying a werewolf…he captures the torment of being a werewolf, illustrating that most are not really bad individuals but souls unwillingly under a curse…and the climatic Dracula v. Werewolf battle scene I never tire of seeing, with glorious, no-holds barred, high-flying kinetic combat portrayed!–Two paws up, and they couldn’t be higher!–Makes me proud to be furry!
The Afflicted…
August 6, 2008
–The gypsy chihuahua Sylvia regarded the sweating man who sat before her in the small enclosed wagon that served as her home. “So, Mr. Talbot,” inquired the chihuahua, “what can I do for you?” The question was at best a formality as the gypsy already knew, just as she knew all things that were to come.
“Great gypsy,” said a very anxious Lawrence Talbot, “I know that you have awesome powers!”
“This is true,” responded the petite chihuahua, looking modestly at her paw but pleased at the compliment. “Please continue…”
“Gypsy, I bear the mark of the werewolf!–I cannot endure another cycle!–Free me, I beg you, of this curse!”
“What you ask requires powerful magic,” cautioned the gypsy, “and is not without its price!”
“No price is too great, Gypsy!,” assured the anguished Lawrence Talbot. “Hurry, I beg you, before the moon rises!”
“As you wish, then,” proclaimed the gypsy, working herself into a trance-like state and raising her saxophone. Her mouth then gaped open and she uttered the following spell, each verse punctuated by bluesy licks on her saxophone:
“When moons shall rise,/ and bring you dread/ take you my curse/I yours instead!”
The mysterious gypsy recovered from her trance as Lawrence Talbot jolted and twitched as if in a seizure. He then was still, opened his eyes, and exulted “I’m free, gypsy woman!–Your remarkable spell has freed me of this curse at last!–But suddenly I understand all mysteries, and can foresee the future!”
“And the down side, is?,” asked Sylvia with a dismissive wave of her paw. “So go take your new powers and make a fortune in the stock market, or perhaps at the racetrack!”
His eyes opened, the former Wolfman enthusiastically shook the gypsy’s paw. “You’ve given me a new life, Sylvia!,” he proclaimed. “I can never thank you enough!”
“Which doesn’t mean that you should stop trying,” counseled the gypsy. Nodding his head, the reborn man left the small wagon and vanished into the night.
As the moon rose, the gypsy began a startling transformation into a were-chihuahua, a snarling beast with menacing claws and savage teeth. A slight smile crossed the face of the transformed gypsy. “What is one man’s curse is another’s fondest dream!,” she observed before flinging herself into the night to begin the first of many successful hunts…
(…with thanks to Lon Chaney and John Dilworth!)
FOXSYLVANIA 
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