Archive for June 2023

Dean Winters’ Allstate Mayhem “Bear” Commercial…

June 24, 2023

Allstate’s “Mayhem” personification Dean Winters is a delight, often playing animal characters in commercials without any attempt made at animal costuming. You only know what he is impersonating because he tells you what he is, and is thinking…and acts the part! Dean Winters has memorably played in Allstate commercials a cat, raccoon, and St. Bernard puppy…

“I’m a bear,” offers Winters, “coming out of hibernation after the best nap of my life. And Papa is HUNGRY!” What, you’ve never seen a bear in a suit before? He comes up through the forest to the partially opened window of an SUV, peering through it in an exploratory fashion…

Without effort, Winters/Bear rips the door off the SUV, going inside in search of food. “And while you’re hitting the trail,” he elaborates, “I’m hitting your cooler!” Foodstuff goes flying out of the vehicle, with Winers happy to find some hot dog rolls…

When he’s done, our well-dressed bear whaps the mirror off the side of the vehicle, just for good measure. Now your insurance may not pay for all of this devastation, so you may wanna get Allstate to be protected from Mayhem, reminds Winters…”Like me!” He roars unconvincingly as he walks off, his job there done…

(The “Mayhem” Fox, Instrument of Chaos!) 🦊

Of Mechanical Beasts: the “Metalhead” episode of “Black Mirror”

June 16, 2023

Set in the monochrome hell of a bleak, dystopian future where artificial intelligence has driven civilization into the ground and all but eradicated humanity, three scavengers enter a warehouse in search of needed supplies to help an injured companion. They extract a box which looks promising, but hidden behind the box is a robotic guard dog…

The Robo-dog, like the creations of Skynet, is an efficient killing machine. It sprays the three humans with tracking shrapnel, and kills one swiftly with a firearm integrated into a limb. The two survivors flee to their vehicles with the Robo-dog in pursuit; this mech is relentless and merciless, and it gallops after them, smashing into one vehicle and killing the driver…

That leaves only the one woman, Bella, alive to battle the robotic horror. Fortunately she’s cut from the same cloth as Linda Hamilton and Sigourney Weaver, crashing her vehicle in an attempt to crush the metalhead but only damaging one of its limbs. That damage renders the robotic dog incapable of climbing a tree, and loss of battery power forces it to power down until it can do a solar recharge. It does so, however, and the pursuit continues…

The Robo-dog selects a knife as an alternative weapon, but the survivalist woman blinds it’s visual sensors with paint. It continues to come after her using auditory sensors, and it takes two shotgun blasts to put it down. Before being destroyed, however, the killer Robo again sprays the woman with tracking shrapnel, one of which lodges hopelessly beyond removal in her jugular.

The tales of Netflix’s “Black Mirror” seldom have happy endings, however, and more robo-dogs are on the way, far more than could be out-battled. The dark tale does, however, end with a twist, leaving the viewer dazed and dazzled…what a rush!

(Battle-damaged Robo-fox on the attack…)