The Coca-Cola Zero Sugar Pinocchio Commercial…



It’s been called “nightmare fuel,” extremely disturbing, and creepy; the Coca-Cola Zero Sugar Pinnochio Commercial, that is!  There is something not quite right about the skin tones, enormous eyes, and jointed arms of our CGI Pinocchio depicted; this is truly something terribly apart from nature.  He may “dance without strings,” but we only want to dance away from him, and quickly. – – Geppetto, how could you do this to us?!   Yes, there’s a bug in this commercial, and for me, he’s the highlight…

Now our marionette-boy is so bowled over by the taste of Coke Zero Sugar that his creator and cricket companion Jiminey don’t seem to believe his raves over the drink, telling Pinnochio that if he keeps lying, he’ll never be a real boy. They seem persuaded, however, upon trying the product.  “I never lie,” maintains Pinnochio. This, of course, is a lie, and causes the would-be boy’s nose to grow to tree-limb length across the room.  We really didn’t need to see this, and the Geico commercials of a few years back handled Pinnochio in a more clever fashion.

Geppetto looks younger and more vigorous than his Disney counterpart in this commercial airing, and I like the treatment of Jiminey Cricket as a fully-fledged anthropomorphic insect, minus the Disney hat, umbrella, and moralizing but complete with the proper number of six rather than Disney’s four limbs. – – This bug could go places if he doesn’t break into singing When You Wish Upon A Star.  So lose the “boy,” but the bug’s a keeper…

 


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10 Comments on “The Coca-Cola Zero Sugar Pinocchio Commercial…”

  1. carycomic Says:

    I prefer the Geico version that called him a “poor motivational speaker.”

    “I see nothing but potential in you—and you—and yooooooops!”

    LOL!

    Liked by 1 person

    • carycomic Says:

      On the other hand, he could give Buffy a run for her money when it came to vampire-slaying.

      “Please, Mr. Dracula, stay away. You’re scaring me!”

      SPROING!

      THUNK!

      “ARRRRRRRRRRRRGH!”

      Reduced to ash…by a nose. ;-D

      Liked by 1 person

    • vulpesffb Says:

      Pinocchio is a kind of animated doll, the creepiness potential of which has spawned legions of horror movies. Animated dolls are not to be trusted…or believed! 🙀

      Liked by 2 people

      • carycomic Says:

        Speaking of Disney imagery, though: here’s something to ponder with regard to the in-story chronology of FROZEN and FROZEN II.

        In the latter film, Anna and Elsa find a map dated (in Roman numerals) “1840.” Now, in the real world, “The Snow Queen” by Hans Christian Andersen was first published in 1844. So, let’s use that as the year Princess Elsa of Arendel was born. That, in turn, would mean that her younger sister Anna was born three years later. It would also mean that Elsa’s coronation occurred during the summer of 1865.

        That’s at least two months after the end of the American Civil War. The military conflict that–among other things–helped popularize photography in general…and photojournalism in particular. And, given how Arendel was evidently so isolated that her soldiers were still using swords and shields for close-quarter combat while (presumably, like the neighboring Duchy of Weaseltown*) still using crossbows as intermediate-range weapons, then it’s understandable why photographs might be seen as almost literally magical objects when they first started making the rounds, in that part of northern Europe, circa 1868!

        To put it in perspective? In the birthplace of famed WWI veteran Alvin York (Tennessee’s Valley of the Three Forks of the Wolf River), the hill people still hunted with single-action muzzle-loading rifles as late as 1916!

        So, let’s try not to judge the Arendelians too harshly. Okay?

        * “That’s Wesselton!”

        Liked by 2 people

        • carycomic Says:

          One more thing to ponder: FROZEN II’s opening scene depicts the celebration of a fall harvest festival during Elsa’s third year as Queen of Arendel. Presumably October; the peak of any autumnal rainbow north of the Equator. So, if we subtract the “34 years/5 months” mentioned by Lt. Matias and Chief Yelena of the Northuldra from that, we get the approximate date of King Runeard’s original treachery.

          June of 1834.

          That makes a fiendish kind of sense as, even in sub-arctic countries, summers can get pretty hot. In which case, an inconveniently dammed-up water supply would almost certainly lead to a trouble-making drought.

          Liked by 1 person

  2. carycomic Says:

    This fox walks into a bar and says to the bartender…

    “I’d like a little hair of the dog that almost bit me.”

    Liked by 1 person


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