Things in the Refrigerator…


I, for one, find the notion of articulate beings addressing me from within the confines of an egg crate disquieting.  As someone who has taken a college-level embryology course, it’s hard enough for me to eat an egg, and I certainly don’t want to converse with one, much less some kind of medieval tiny humanoid thing clad in armor emerging from the crate.  This is clearly abnormal and wrong on so many different levels…

Introduced in 2012, Sir Can-A-Lot is on a crusade to “rescue the world from routine meals.” This Is far preferable, I suppose, to joining ISIS, and the diminutive knight is polite if annoyingly enthusiastic about the SPAM product that he endorses as “glorious SPAM!”  And I thought that needed a life!

Now in my dark little mind, I would like to see this scene rewritten to resemble a memorable one in the Gremlins films where a housewife becomes a kitchen samurai when confronted by invading gremlins, using household appliances against the invaders to deadly effect .– Let’s have the lady of the house grab the little knight, throw him in the microwave, and see if he sparks! Consider also throwing him in the sink garbage disposal to see how protective that tiny suit of armor really is! With a kitchen array of food processors, blenders, and cutting knives the possibilities for home defense are both varied and entertaining.

My mind is a strange and frightening place to be, really…

Explore posts in the same categories: absurdities, anthropomorphic, strange, television

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4 Comments on “Things in the Refrigerator…”

  1. carycomic Says:

    I’ve often thought that Syfy Channel should do a Saturday night movie-of-the-week entitled…IT CAME FROM THE BACK OF THE REFRIGERATOR! The obvious moral of the story being:

    “Clean out that stuff along the inner rear wall of the fridge before it evolves into a sentient–and malevolent–lifeform.”


    • vulpesffb Says:

      When my potato salad went bad, it held me up at gunpoint…


      • carycomic Says:

        “Potato Salad Annie!
        {Doot! Doo-doo-doo-doot!}
        She done kidnapped my granny.
        {Doot! Doo-doo-doo-doot!}”

        It’s a Motown joke.


        • carycomic Says:

          My bad! TJW never sang for Motown. He was what you might call “melanistically impaired.” But, then again, I used to think LeAnn Rimes was the baby sister of Busta Rymes!! So, what do I know?


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